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December 2010 Moms
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WWYD: "Lost the will to live" (NBR)

ChatterboxBride09ChatterboxBride09
in December 2010 Moms

Sorry for what I assume will be a fairly emotional posting but I don't know what else to do right now...

 My mom just got off the phone with her dad and he mentioned that my grandma has basically "lost the will to live." We saw her a month ago at my cousins wedding and they went home a day early because she just wanted to go home and lay in bed. She came to my wedding last December and did the same thing, she stayed for the ceremony but left before the reception. She' had surgery a few years ago and has been in a wheelchair ever since because she didn't want to do physical therepy, now she isn't capable of walking. She rarely gets out of bed now, and its not because she can't...but simply doesn't want to anymore. 

Grandpa doesn't think she will make it until December (which made my hysterical to think about). I want her to be able to meet (or at least see pics) of her first Great Grandchild.

How do you encourage someone who has "lost the will to live" to keep trying??  

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Re: WWYD: "Lost the will to live" (NBR)

  • 1CINCYGIRL1CINCYGIRL
    I am not sure you can do anything about it, it seems so much bigger than a an easy fix. Maybe you can encourage family to take her to the doctor. My father became depressed after having major surgery- we went with him to the doctor and they prescribed meds for depression. After 2-4 weeks we started seeing a difference. I understand how difficult this is for everybody involved- my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
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  • MrsSmiley09MrsSmiley09
    So sorry you are dealing with this!  She may need a doctor's help.  It's understandable that she is depressed and feeling this way.  I would encourage everyone in the family to give her extra love and attention.  Ask for her advice and try to include her in anything you can.  Maybe she will start feeling loved and appreciated and find the will to live again. 
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  • Chick7806Chick7806 member

    I don't really have any advice to offer other than to say I'm sorry. We recently went through this with my MIL. She had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in November and went steadily downhill. Towards the end, she would/could not go out of the house and didn't really want to be involved in anything- I think if she did, then she would have to face the possibility of her own demise. It was an awful couple of months, and I tried to encourage her through phone calls and such, but you can't make someone behave/feel a certain way. Just be there for her and enjoy the time that you have.

    My MIL died in early June, and I was beyond heartbroken... still am. But I've also been working hard to reshape my thinking about the situation. I'm sorry you having to deal with this, especially right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you. 

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  • chickaboo1974chickaboo1974 member

    I am sorry to hear about your grandma.   Having worked in hospice for years, I know it is not uncommon for the elderly to enter into depression.  It sounds to me that your grandma is depressed.  She would probably benefit from seeing a Dr. that specializes in geriatrics.  I say that because some drugs effect the elderly in different and sometimes dangerous ways.  This Dr. could review what meds she is on now and then prescribe something for depression.

     

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  • missesrumissesru member

    I'm sorry you're going through this.

    Unfortunately, there may be no way to encourage her to "keep trying".  Sometimes "losing the will to live" is really being ready to move on, and that's not necessarily a bad thing.  I'm sure your grandma has a ton of great memories, and a great family to be proud of.  In general, death and dying are looked upon as negative.... but that doesn't have to be the case, and maybe it's not the case for your grandma.  

    Obviously I don't know you, or your family, or the situation... but I think many people in similar situations are ready to move on, and those around them aren't comfortable accepting that and find it difficult to understand.

    Hopefully you can find peace with this situation, whatever the outcome will be.   

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 

    BFP #1 ~ 1/26/2010 ~ MMC @ 6w6d discovered @ 11w3d ~ D&C 3/16/10
    BFP #2 ~ 4/22/2010 ~ EDD 12/29/2010 ~ Born 12/19/2010 ~ My Rainbow Baby
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