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tst1998 · August 2010

After 11 months of trying with absolutely no success I finally gave in and accepted we might need some help. I just went in for my first lab tests yesterday, and am terrified of what the results might show. I'm 34 (35 in three months), DH is 33. We've been married for just over two years. I naively thought we could wait until my work schedule was good, and boom--we'd get pregnant. HA! No such luck. This has been the hardest 11 months of my life, constantly up and down the roller coaster of hope and disappointment. Well-meaning friends telling me "oh just wait, it will happen for you!" I hate getting the "guess what, we're expecting!" emails, not because I want anyone else to be going through what I am, but because I don't understand why it isn't working for us. There's nothing to suggest any problems, regular periods, I'm ovulating, DH has had a previous pregnancy to his credit. And I have wonderful friends, even a few who've been through ART who really do mean well. I know they know what I'm going through, but they have their babies. They go home after hanging out with me and think how glad they are no longer where I am. I feel very alone.

And that's why I finally decided to see an RE. With them on board, I'm hoping this feeling of futility will be lessened. Right now we're exploring the possibility of luteal phase defect. Anyone have experience with that? I alwasy associated that with recurrent miscarriages, not inability to conceive. DH still needs to get tested (he's terrified of doctors). And if we still don't have a good explination, I'm looking into acupuncture/Chinese medicine. Maybe I just need to relax? Has anyone tried that?

Sorry for the long introduction. A friend recommend this as a good soure of support for this process, and I'm hoping going through this with a few other people (even if just virtually) will make the ups and downs a bit more tolerable. Thanks for listening!

LnR70707 · August 2010

Welcome and GL!

and no, relaxing has nothing to do with it and is the worst advice anyone with IF could get. Some of the ladies going through IVF have used acupuncture in conjunction with their meds, but I don't think there is any proof that it increases fertility.

STL34 · August 2010

Welcome to the board. Sorry you have to be here. Good luck!

Hollwd · August 2010

Welcome and I promise you will catch on quickly to all of our little references also not sure if you have been lurking but at the bottom of this page on the left hand side there is a bump glossary that will help explain out abbreviations.

GOOD LUCKand hope you are not here long.

lckcdc3 · August 2010

Welcome, sorry you have to be here. Sorry, I don't have any experience with luteal phase defect. However, this board is filled with really great ladies with great advice.

Oh and as far as your "relax" comment. For most of us it's like nails on a chalk board (even if you are just talking about yourself Smile ). It's obviously best to relax but a lot of us here have gotten the "relax" comment told to us and its AWFUL to hear. Relaxing doesn't fix medical problems! I hope your RE can find out what the problem is. As scary as it is going through all the testing, its really great to have an action plan going forward!

Sunflower0908 · August 2010

Welcome to the board.

I hope your RE appointment goes well and you can start to get some answers or a plan in place.

Those "relax" comments are just so annoying. As I said to one friend who told me to relax: "If I had a broken leg, would you tell me to Just Relax? No, you'd tell me to see a Doctor".

Anyway, good luck and Welcome!

tst1998 · August 2010

Thanks for the directions to the glossary! Some of these posts are like reading a foreign language. Hopefully I don't commit any breeches of etiquette while trying to find my way around here.

crystalmarcellin · August 2010

The ladies on this board have great knowledge and advice and understand what we are all going through. It's nice to come some where like this for support and also it's nice to be able to vent about how everyone says, " relax and don't try to hard and it will happen." That saying got old real quick!

orange1414 · August 2010

Welcome and good luck!

bellasera · August 2010

I think relaxing is good for your own sanity, not because it's going to get you pregnant. I know it's hard going through test (I kept pushing it off myself) because we are so afraid of the answer. Personally, knowing has lifted this weight off my shoulders and I can now move forward to actually trying to have a baby.

In my case (tubal damage), no amount of relaxation or accupuncture would have gotten me pregnant. (But I have to add that I did enjoy accupuncture).

Good luck with the tests.

roxhudson · August 2010

Good luck with your testing. I just introduced myself this week and everyone has been very welcoming. Ditto on the relaxing...seeing my RE was the best thing I could have done for myself b/c they confirmed that I needed treatment if we were ever going to get pregnant.

Welcome!

Liz629 · August 2010

Welcome. I am also relatively new and just had my HSG today. Starting to get answers is a big relief.

Ms H13 · August 2010

Welcome to the board. It's a good place to vent, get advice, and talk to people who are in the same place emotionally.

Eris-Alexis · August 2010

Welcome and GL. What you are feeling is a common theme on this board and is totally justified. The women here are amazing and have already taught me a lot.

I am intermittently annovulatory and also have a suspected luteal phase defect. My Dr put me on Clomid this cycle to sort out the ovulation issues, and also said that it could help with the luteal phase. Mine is about 10 days, so just a couple days short of what it should be.

It is excellent that you are going to see an RE. I hope that you are able to come up with a plan you feel comfortable with. Having a plan in place definitely made me feel better.

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