What is a polite way to tell people not to touch me?

hawaii123 · August 2010

I have a CW and at least 2 of H's family members that I just know will pat my belly when they find out I'm pregnant and will become down right obnoxious when I start to show. I am one of those people that doesn't like people in my personal space, let alone touching me. To me, just because I am carrying a child doesn't give them the right to put their hands on me...and I know its going to make me irritable and I just might smack someone if I don't have something to say to tell them its not allowed. Any ideas? Embarrassed

kwitt22 · August 2010

Ask them if you can touch their belly!

In all seriousness, I would just kinda back away and say I am really not comfortable with you touching my belly. Its all in the tone you use, just be polite about it.

Tarah716 · August 2010

I know - I hear it's open season for randoms to come up and touch your belly once you start showing. I don't mind if friends & family do it but I don't want Joe Smith feeling he has the right to pat my tummy. It's still me he's touching and that's odd.

I've read the best way to deal with this is to step back from the touch and put your arm out to block them from reaching forward. Then say - I know you mean well but I'm just not a fan of the touching of my belly. Thanks for your congrats though.

eeyoreem · August 2010

I don't think I'd be so polite about it. I'm not really all that worried about people I know and family touching me, though none of them have yet. I just know that I would flip out if someone I didn't know that well did it.

skio · August 2010

Ugh, I don't know, but I'd like to know the best way, too. I like my personal space and don't want anyone at all except DH touching my belly. My SIL was already all over me when we told them the news...at 9 weeks. I really wanted to smack her hand away. I ended up just bluntly telling her that my "belly" is just gas and bloat right now, so she backed off, but I know she'll be back when I start to show.

I think I'll just put my own hand on my belly and nonchalantly push theirs off and take a step back. If people don't take the hint, I guess I'll have to just say, "Please don't touch." Or maybe I'll just get one of these:

Other good ones on this web site.

azpharmgirl · August 2010

maybe when you are around these people hold something in front of you like a drink or hug your stomach so it is harder for them to touch you. make sure you have plenty of room around you so you can move away and see when they are about to make their move. also maybe ask dh to step in if he can to say "my wife really isn't comfortable with people touching her." otherwise what is said above sounds reasonable.

eeyoreem · August 2010

my friend had a shirt when she was preg that said "touch the belly, lose a hand"

hawaii123 · August 2010

skio:

Other good ones on this web site.

LOL!

I didn't realize complete strangers walked up and touched pregnant women also. Now those people are likely to get PUNCHED

RayRay007 · August 2010

I probably wouldnt be polite about it! lol. I can just see my FIL saying "look at you!" and touching my belly every time I see him and I will probably just roll my eyes and suck it up and take it, but it it's anyone other than my immediate family (incl. dh's), then it's going to be "don't touch me" period.

Kayteagirl · August 2010

The one I plan on using is if they touch my belly, I'm going to pat theirs...NO ONE likes their belly rubbed by randoms...

drpayne · August 2010

I think I might say "I didn't realize we were so close" and grab his/her belly right back.

justme9 · August 2010

I'm in the same boat. If a stranger tries to touch me, I have no problem being rude. I find it incredibly rude to think a strangers belly is public property.

With family, I want to be polite (although I still think it's rude to assume you're suddenly allowed access into my bubble space.) For now, I've made a couple of vague remarks that I hope nobody starts touching me when I start showing. I hope they pick up that family is included in the "nobody," not just strangers.

But, I definitely need a polite way to discourage touchers before they start touching me or I will definitely spit out something snide.

mommyjenny257 · August 2010

One of my best friends had a random woman in Walmart come walking up to her with her hand out to touch her belly. My friend quickly swatted away the hand and said "Excuse me, I don't know you!" and walked away.

Magical95 · August 2010

I am definitely going to go on the offensive and watch and if someone tries I am going to take a step back or stop their hand. If it is someone I am closer to I may get more verbal. Like my sister (she's 16) reached over and touched my belly in public in front of family who didn't know so I reached over and started rubbing hers and called her out on it. I may feel differently when it is more than fat, but right now no one should touch it.

on_the_move · August 2010

If you honestly want to be polite than maybe something like " I know you are excited, but I don't like being touched" or "would you mind keeping your hands to yourself"

It's easy to say you would be rude, but when you have that nice personality it can be hard to shut down some people who you might care a bit about.

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