How do you feel about belly-touching?

IrishCoffee7 · August 2010

I am not what you'd call a touchy-feely person but I'm not uncomfortable with the occasional hug etc. either. I totally thought I'd be fine if family members showed affection to my belly, even close friends. So far no one had really tried to touch until this weekend.

I visited my family this weekend and my sisters and closer relatives were gawking over the belly and wanting to rub etc. For some reason when my little sister (17) did it it was ok but when other relatives (even my mom or my SIL, whom I'm close to) tried to touch, I totally cringed.

I feel weird being so opposed to it since it's my family and I don't think they'd expect me to care that much. But I felt like everyone was all up in my personal space!!

Hyfagal · August 2010

I'm not a fan. I don't really want anyone but H all up in my biz but I'm able to supress my automatic judo chop action when it's a family member.

ashleywebber · August 2010

Since my love language is touch, I like it. No one that's touched me has bothered me.

Allie30 · August 2010

Your love language? tell me more!

I love it, but no one does it! :-( Sometimes my husband does but I often have to ask him to. She always kicks when people touch, but usually, it's just her and me.

~Flossie~ · August 2010

If it is people I know well, I am fine with it. Strangers- no way. So far everyone who has touched my belly asked first so it wasn't a surprise or anything.

MassageMomma2010 · August 2010

I'm cool with it. But I don't guarantee they'll feel anything. DH has only felt LO move a few times. Most of the kicks or nudges are right under my right boob and I doubt anyone will know to stick their hand there.

Some family will just go for it, most strangers ask for permission first. I didn't like it when Step-MIL talked to my belly as if I weren't there. That bothered me much more than a half second belly pat.

bstrangely · August 2010

it depends who it is. we have a close friend who is just inexplicably drawn to it and always apologizes while he's touching the belly. that's ok. dh's aunt who i'm not at all close to has actually hugged it a couple of times... not me... just the belly. that's a little weird. she needs to throw me a shower or something if she wants those kinds of privileges. it doesn't help that she's usually been drinking and lingers like she's at the end of a date with it.

wife1014 · August 2010

It depend who it is and for how long. I don't care about a tiny rub or pat, but any longer than that is just odd unless it's my husband, sister, or mom.

ashleywebber · August 2010

heckysue:
Allie30:

Your love language? tell me more!

I love it, but no one does it! :-( Sometimes my husband does but I often have to ask him to. She always kicks when people touch, but usually, it's just her and me.

I think it's from that book...like The Five Love Languages or something. A girl I work with was reading it...it discusses the way people express and receive/perceive love and how to communicate between the different "love languages."

This. There is a book called The Five Love Languages. Basically we all have a primary love language (one of five - acts of service, words of affirmation, gifts, touch, or quality time). Mine is touch. Of course most of us like some or all of them. I really enjoy being touched (like having my head rubbed, being scratched). Being pregnant, people rubbing my belly is fine with me. Of course I love when DH does it.

OCIrishBruin · August 2010

I absolutely hate it. The only person I want touching my belly (besides me) is DH. Everyone else - hands off!

MTAngel · August 2010

I don't like it - I'll let my friends and family if they ask first but I certainly don't suggest it to anyone. I don't know why it bugs me but something about it just rubs me the wrong way.

2.red.heads · August 2010

i'm not really a touchy-feely person either, but for some reason i don't mind my belly getting touched. sadly, hardly anyone ever does!! not even my husband!

jbergs · August 2010

There is no logic to who I'm comfortable with touching my belly. Essentially I have one friend, my doula & DH are the only ones I've been comfortable with touching my belly - oh, and the Dr. too! I can't stand it when my mom or MIL do it.

Allie30 · August 2010

ashleywebber:
This. There is a book called The Five Love Languages. Basically we all have a primary love language (one of five - acts of service, words of affirmation, gifts, touch, or quality time). Mine is touch. Of course most of us like some or all of them. I really enjoy being touched (like having my head rubbed, being scratched). Being pregnant, people rubbing my belly is fine with me. Of course I love when DH does it.

Thanks for the info! I'll have to check that out. I'm so clearly a "touch" and "acts of service" person. My husband can tell me he loves me until the cows come home, but do the dishes or bring me home a pizza or scratch my back and I melt into a big puddle of goo.

And that's also what I tend to do for him -- like if he's having a tough day I'll bring him a burger and shake (his favorite) at work or something.

Tink0910 · August 2010

If I know the person I dont care. Strangers that have or have tried HELL NO!

mkeatts · August 2010

Totally hate it. And my friends are obsessed with my belly (I'm the first one to be pregnant). I want to punch them, but then I feel guilty, because they are just excited for me. But mostly I want to punch them.

cnu_gurl · August 2010

I dont mind if DH does it, and there are a few ladies at work who have touched it, but only for a few seconds. Strangers=NO WAY! And I dont know why, but I discourage my mom from touching my belly. Only because everyone else asks, and my mom will just come up out of nowhere and rub my belly. My mom has a way of picking at my last nerve.. and so I just tell her dont touch, unless I tell you to.

McJen715 · August 2010

It depends on the person. If they are super grabby and hold their hand really hard on my belly for too long I get annoyed. If they just sort of want to feel her moving when I mention she's moving I don't mind so much. It also depends on how bitchy I'm feeling that day.

I thought I would hate it a lot more than I do though. I don't hate it in most cases.

KJmashup · August 2010

I am normally not a touchy-feely person at all, but I have actually been enjoying most of the belly touches. My pregnancy brings out a new side of my coworkers, family, and friends, and I enjoy see their faces light up whenever they touch my belly and talk to LO.

I would not want a total stranger to touch me, though. Ick.

blondek8 · August 2010

I'm not a touchy-feely person in the least, but surprisingly I haven't minded the belly rubs. As long as it's people I know it's fine. Excluding my MIL -- hands off.

MamaKajsa · August 2010

I'm not a fan of people wanting to touch unless I offer it to them. I even had a strange woman come up to me while I was working and just plant her hands right on my belly. I didn't even know the chick!!!!!!

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