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February 2011 Moms
hesherhero
member
Okinawa, Japan
hesherhero
member
Hi Ladies,
My husband just got to Okinawa, Japan on unaccompanied orders. It was much easier to deal with being away from each other before we found out I was pregnant. We decided it wouldbe best to get married before he left instead of after he got done with his year there now that I am pregnant. We figured we would just do this year and not have his orders changed since we would have to stay there for 3 years instead of 1. He called me the other night upset and said that he changed his mind and was going to talk to some people to see if there was anyway to get me over there. I tried telling him that it was probably too late. He's convinced since he is married now and expecting a child they may make an execption, I'm not counting on it happening at all. I really wanted to go with him at first and he thought maybe I should stay here, but now I'm starting to think he was right maybe he should just do this year alone and I stay here with my family and him just come home in February for the birth. Don't get me wrong I want to be with him so bad right now. But, I'm not sure I can handle being in Japan for 3 years with my first baby and alone. If I wasn't pregnant it would be a completely different story I would have gone in a heartbeat. I'm just thinking what would be best for me and the baby right now and I'm not sure that being there for 3 years is. Just looking for advice and maybe what would you do if you were in this position.
Thank you!!
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Re: Okinawa, Japan
My SIL was living in Okinawa with her husband when she got pregnant with her first. They had no family there, and it was hard. But they did fine. You'll make friends who can help you out if you need help with the baby.
I live in Alaska, and my family lives in Texas and Hawaii. So, that's almost just as isolated as Japan, and I'm not worried about not having help. My mom will come up for a week, and that's it. Maybe your family could come visit for a week or so too?
If it were me, I would go be with my husband. But I can see why you would want to stay too. Good luck with whatever you decide.
-m/c at 11w2d due to partial molar 2008 -m/c #2 2009
Beautiful daughter born February 2011
**Ultimate TTCALer 2009**
That is such a tough decision. I think that if I were in your position, I would go with my husband. Living on a military base is different than living in the foreign country off of base. It's true that you wouldn't really see your family, but in that kind of situation, you are with other families who are away from home as well and you become each other's support system.
So, if he's there by himself, it's for 1 year...if you go with him, it's 3 years? I'm a little confused exactly what's going on. If he's only there for a year, and then comes back, isn't it possible that he'll be stationed far from family again? Then when you go to be with him, you could STILL have to be far from everyone.
On each side there are benefits and sacrifices...but neither would be a bad decision. Good luck!
I was on the Mainland when we had our first baby. I gotta say I LOVED JAPAN. I've been to Okinawa too (It was just a 4 night stay, but still got to go off base and see some stuff.) It's awesome!!
I personally would put in the 1306 and get the heck over there!! Japan/Oki is a GORGEOUS, wonderful place to have a family. It's a very short flight to the mainland, and also super short to GUAM!!! Which if you go to Oki, you MUST go to Guam for at least a week. Take a MAC flight (free) and stay in the AF/Navy hotel there for cheap, and go snorkeling in Tumon, visit Lover's rock and the water park there... We stayed in Hotel Nikko and it's a drop dead gorgeous hotel.
Okinawa is not a death sentence and personally, I couldn't handle being without my husband for a year ESPECIALLY expecting a baby! Family can catch good deals for tickets in May-ish and come see you and visit a country they'd otherwise never see. Good luck in your decision, 4 1/2 years in Yokosuka was NOT enough for me! You'll love the festivals and every thing there. If you want to talk to me about it, you can send me a message.
Hi, Congratulations on everything (pregnancy and marriage). I have to admit I was lurking around. I'm apart of the International Nestie board on TheNest. Please come over and introduce yourself. We have a few nesties that I know have lived in Japan before, but I don't know if we have anyone lives in Okinawa.
But we have very many ladies who are expat wives and mothers living away from family. They may be able to assist with any questions. We are super friendly and enjoy helping.
DH and I moved to Australia in February. I was super excited about it all. A few weeks after getting here, I was pregnant and I'm due in December. I can tell you that there are days that I think to myself 'Seriously, what I have I gotten myself into?' We have no family here and a very small network of friends. But I'm also very excited and happy. I know there are women who have much less support than I do and they make it work. Good luck with your decision.