Natural Birth

I don't feel prepared for a natural birth at all, starting to panic..

I feel like there are 10 books I should have read by now, I should have been meditating WAY more, doing yoga, watching videos, everything I can to prepare and I haven't. All I have done is hired a doula, and I have done some relaxation breathing with DH a handful of times. I know in my heart this is what I want, and I really believe deep down I can do it, but in terms of actually doing my homework and preparing for it, I feel so unprepared. And there are moments when I do start to doubt myself if I can really do this. Last night my DH said jokingly "Yep, You're right, you are unprepared, I don't know how our ancestors ever got through a natural birth without prenatal yoga or Birthing From Within. You mine as well forget the whole thing right now". It made me laugh, but then I started to cry anyways. I have an appointment with my doula this week and I am going to bring it up to her. It's not that the motivation isn't there either, it's really just more of the time factor, I have been so incredibly busy I can hardly breath. Any advice to cram study for a natural birth? Am I just overreacting ladies? Thanks for any advice you can give. :)

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Re: I don't feel prepared for a natural birth at all, starting to panic..

  • I read a couple books and had birth class with my MW, but I never practiced breathing or anything like that.  I would famialiarize yourself with the stages of labor (bc knowing when you're in transition and it'll be over soon helps).  It's natural, you'll be fine.  I'm a wimp (just ask my DH), I had a bit of pit (induced at 23 days past EDD), and gave birth to a 10 lber without pain meds.  If I can do it, anyone can.
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  • I agree with PP  - read about the phases of labor, emotional signposts of labor, etc. so that you can be prepared a little more.  Also, I think reading positive natural birth stories really helps too, because it gives you the confidence that you too can do it! 
    Lilypie - (YBLf)

    Lilypie - (Cfah)
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  • your H is mostly right!  we are made to deliver babies and you'll do what naturally comes to you that will be the best way for you to deliver.

    if you want to be more prepared, watch some natural births on youtube and read a lot of positive natural stories.  I think doing those two things have helped me immensely.

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  • Okay, thanks ladies. I'm glad to hear that you still think it's possible for me without all the preparations I feel I should be doing. I'm going to watch some videos on youtube and talk to my doula about the stages of labor. It's comforting knowing that some of you have already done it, with or without preparations, even with pitocin! Thanks again, I feel a lot better :) I love this board!!!
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  • First, I would worry much more if you thought that you were completely prepared for birth - it's much more normal to worry about the unknown.

    Do you have Netflix? The streaming option has prenatal yoga videos - that might be something easy to do right now. And prenatal yoga seriously helped me a ton when I was pg the first time (though have I done it at all this pg? Hell no! I'm in the same boat as you, hee hee...).

    I think the best bits of advice I gleaned from prepping the first time was to take each contraction one at a time - don't think about how many are left, and just relax during them. The other one was to really visualize your cervix opening during contractions, and the baby coming down, etc, etc. Cheesy, but it helps.

    You can do this - I definitely remember panicking about labor towards the end! Good luck!!

    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • I feel the same as you, I feel like I have hardly prepared, been so busy. I used to read all this natural childbirth stuff before I was pregnant but haven't really wanted to read ANY thing since I have been pregnant, except how my baby is currently developing. We did some practice relaxation breathing in our hospital childbirthing classes but that is about it. I am worried that I'll forget how to breath or concentrate. My husband keeps saying we need to practice and I agree, but we keep forgetting to. I am taking encouragement from what everyone else has said.
  • Thanks again so much ladies, I feel TONS better. And will do on the reading of Ina's book, Keri, thanks :)
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  • Ahh you just made me feel so much better! I am totally in the same boat as you and constantly go through days of self doubt and feel like a giant clock is ticking down and I haven't done everything I was suppose to do. But the responses everyone gave are so right on and I feel so much better now. We live in a world of so much information and giant checklists that it's easy for us to feel unprepared, but when you think about it- how could anyone fully prepare for the unknown? You will do great---thanks for being so honest :)
  • I went to an antenatl class, but it wasn't natural focused, just a generic one. It was good to help me learn all the terminology.

    I got a book out of the library on yoga and birthing. I think I did the exercises less than 5 times.

    I thought about perineum massage. I did that twice, very half-heartedly. 

    I discussed my wants for the birth with my midwife once.

    That was the extent of my preparation.

    I had the birth I wanted. I went all natural except for using gas when I was pushing. But this was part of my birth plan, in that I was relaxed about using gas. I think next time I'll aim to do it without, because I feel like if it hadn't been available I would have been fine. 

    I used hot water, a lot inthe shower and the tub.

    I tried other things that didn't really work for me like wheat packs, birthing stool. I had snacks on hand, but didn't want to eat.

    The antenatal class had lots of info on various labouring positions. I vaguely looked at the sheet. On the day, I just did what felt most comfortable, because that's what you naturally do when you're in pain.

    So I guess my point is, it's good to be informed but on the day your body really does take over and will guide you towards what is most comfortable for you. 

    In hindsight, a lot of what I did whilst labouring, ie, leaning over and rocking my hips and squating down through the contraction because it was most comfortable, was also what the antenatal class and my midwife told me was most effective for easing the baby down the birth canal and into the optimal position.

    So, your body really does know what to do.

    Good luck for your upcoming birth. You'll do great. 

     

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    Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
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