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Alabama Babies
Just curious
Does one set of grandparents see your LO more than the other? Does LO recognize one set better? If one set sees them more than the other do you know the reason or is it a mystery or is it just the way it is?
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Re: Just curious
FIL and SMIL see her way more than anyone else. They live in town and DH and his dad work together. MIL lives about an hour away and gets to see her not quite as much, but still more than my family.
The funny thing is, DD loves her Grammy (my mom) more than any of the others. She's SO happy with my parents and I think that's because they aren't all in her face 24/7. My parent's don't do the baby talk with her and just talk in soothing normal voices (like DH and I do).
SMIL and MIL have to be right.there.in.her.face all the time making big expressions and talking in high pitched baby voices. Because of this DD cries any time they hold her or get too close to her. I try to tell them to just talk normally (and to hold her upright and not cradled) but they don't listen. SMIL actually gets pretty offended that "her baby" (ugh) "doesn't like her". Maybe they'll learn one of these days!
DD sees my parents WAY more! My mom keeps her every day while I work, so that is the biggest reason why. There are also several issues with DH's family, so we don't let his parents keep her. They only see her once or twice a month (maybe.)
Of course DD is much closer to my parents and reacts differently to them. I think it is natural to be more comfortable with people you see more often.
My parents see her at least once a week because we trade off on going to their house and them coming here...they live about 45 minutes away and she definitely recognizes them better.
My inlaws hardly know Aubrey. They don't really come over here much, and so the only time they see her is when we go over there and they pretty much think we should always come there. They only live an hour away, but I still feel like they should be willing to even things out more..plus they only usually want us to come on Saturday evenings and evening isn't Aubrey's best time of the day...it's when she is fussy. We tell them that but they don't listen. So she is usually fussy with them, doesn't want to let me or Wes out of her sight, and so due to that they think she is a difficult baby and they get their feelings hurt because they think she doesn't like them.
FIL sees him every day, so obviously they are very close. However, he loves my parents and gets excited every time he sees them (still quite a bit, considering we live a few hours away). I think it helps that he "talks" to my mom on the phone every day and sees pictures of them a lot.
I think it's normal, like Rory said, to be more comfortable with those you see often. I also believe that babies are naturally more comfortable with certain people, and that it does matter how they act around the baby (as Amelia said).
Each set of grandparent's live around 3.5-4 hours away. We see my mom and SFIL/MIL about the same amount, just in different spurts. He recognizes them equally, but I think he's closer to my mom than MIL. Like pp said, MIL is all up in his business and I think he gets aggravated at that. He's much more himself around my family.
We rarely see FIL/SMIL. I hate it, too, because he needs to know them also. But, they hardly make an effort to come here, and we usually split the weekend when we go to DH's home.
DS may see my mom just slightly more than MIL, but really not that much. My mom lives closer so I looked to her for quick babysitting when I'm doing things on our side of town. MIL only lives 25 minutes away though so he still sees her a lot. I think they both are probably equally recognized and favored by DS right now though. He cracks big smiles at the sight of either of them and always has a great time with them.
My dad sees DS about once a month and he's never met FIL. But he see's DH's uncle (FIL's brother) quite a bit though. He and his family live around the corner and he has been DH's father figure. Interestingly enough, FIL called a few days ago complaining that he's never met DS. It makes me laugh.
My mom and my grandparents see K usually about once a month or so. They live 2.5 hours away and I often go to florence to visit them. When we can't make the trip up there, my mom sometimes comes down for a night to babysit so that DH and I can have a date night.
My dad lives across the country, so K has only met him three times.
My inlaws, on the other hand, live about 7 hours away. We try to see them about once every 2-3 months, but it's a long drive.
Basically, DD warms up to people really fast. With my mom she knows who she is and will reach out for her immediately, although that just started within the last month or two. With everyone else, she will cling on to me or DH for the first few minutes until she figures out that the inlaws or other family members are nice people.
natural m/c and d&c at 10 weeks - 1/24/2014
DX w/ hetero C677t and A1298C MTHFR - 3/4/2014