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Update: Behavioral issues
A month or so ago, I posted about behavioral/emotional issues we've been experiencing with Sam, and I wasn't sure whether to seek the help of a professional at this point, or to wait until he's a little older.
Well, after yet another disagreement with DH over each other's parenting approaches after a particularly difficult time with Sam, I agreed to go ahead and have Sam evaluated. I figure if nothing else, we can get some input on how we can be better parents for him and meet his needs better.
DH and I met with her this morning, and I just really loved her. I think we made the right decision, we chose a great doctor, and it's going to be a very good thing for all of us. She's going to meet Sam on Friday for their first evaluation session. She'll do 5 sessions before she makes any kind of diagnosis (3 with just Sam, 1 with him + me, then 1 with him + DH, to see how we each interact with him).
I just wanted to thank you all for giving me your input and thoughts before, and to let you know what we'd decided. It's been very hard for me to admit to myself that my little boy has troubles, but well, Sam just is not typical in any way, and I just am trying to see this as an education on how to parent a unique child. I hope that by starting this process at this young age, we can head off any potential larger problems that would arise down the road. I just want to help him get to a place where he can achieve anything he wants.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Update: Behavioral issues
i'm glad to hear you had a good experience with meeting your new doctor. it sounds like you're happy with how things will be progressing from here. keep us updated on what she determines. i think it would be great to have someone offer helpful tips on dealing with kids....other than granny and papa.
good luck.
GOOD FOR YOU!!!!
ITA with one of the pp that Knowledge is power! It sounds like you have found an ideal doctor since she doesn't want to rush into a diagnosis. I think it's really great that she wants to observe your parenting styles separately - maybe it's just something that he is playing off the both of you, and the doctor will be able to see this, which you would never be able to do(be an outsider looking in).
It sounds like you are doing what's best for your DS, no matter what the outcome!
I'm glad you're happy with your decision and I hope everything turns out for the very best. Sounds like Sam is in great hands!
Just curious about the docs in Singapore, since we lived in Mexico for a time and Sarah was delivered there. How hard was it to find an English speaking doctor and what discipline did you choose? Developmental pedi, psychologist, et cetera?
Thanks everyone. I, too, am very comforted by her approach to diagnosis. I feel confident that we made the right decision.
KKMMex, it wasn't hard at all. English is very prevalent here. It's the language of business for the most part, and it is required study for local school children. There's just a small minority of people who don't speak it, and they're mainly the older Chinese generation. Granted they have their own dialect (called Singlish), and some people are harder to understand than others. Sometimes I have to ask them to repeat themselves a couple of time, because it's kind of "broken" English with some extra stuff thrown in there.
As for how we chose, I've never even heard of a developmental pediatrician, so we went with a clinical psychologist. She's Asian, but she did all of her study in the U.S., so we knew she'd be familiar with the American culture, and hopefully Sam could feel more comfortable.
Congrats on moving forward. I agree that this doctor sounds like one you can certainly feel confident with when she does make a diagnosis. Keep us updated.
(as an aside, I sort of feel like you are lucky to be outside the US for this. in my experience from friends, I bet a doctor like that would be harder to track down in the states)
So glad you have a plan moving forward that you're comfortable with!
And best of luck with your eval time with him. I know I'd be freaking out about trying to act naturally when I knew I was being observed.
6-yr-old Elena and 4-yr-old Julia.
My Blog! All about my girls and quilting
Have hope! Seeing an expert is the first step, but be open to alternative approaches. My best friend has triplets and two of them (a boy and a girl)have been diagnosed with problems in the autism spectrum. They were diagnosed when they were two and three years later they have made amazing progress.
They started doing cognitive therapy, which is the approach that traditional psychologist recommend. After 18 months of this therapy, they develop a lot of social skills but my friend decided that (a) they seemed to have reached a plateau, (b) she was convinced that these behavioral problems can be cured - regardless of what doctors say. So she put them in the SonRise program, which has been a wonderful thing for the kid and the parents because it has changed everyone's perception about the behavioral issues.
I know you still don't have a diagnosis, but when you do get one, I encourage to be open. I am a scientist by training and worked for years in medical research. I was super skeptical of the alternative approaches that my friend sought to treat her children after traditional medicine couldn't give her more answers. But I'm the first to admit that I was wrong and these kids are completely different from the kids I knew just 3 years ago.
Good luck in this journey.
rayskit10--I can't really say for sure how hard it would be to find someone like this doctor in the U.S., but I will say that the quality of medical care here is top notch. We've been so pleased--every doctor any of us have had has been proactive and open-minded. Most offices are even open on Saturdays!
newinhouston--That is wonderful that your friend's kids have made such progress with an alternative approach. I'm actually very open minded about that kind of thing, although my husband would be less so. I'm currently getting treatment from my obgyn for hormone imbalance, and we're doing it all through diet and a vitamin regimen. He's very skeptical, but he's also seen an improvement, so he's coming around!
I'm glad you have such great care there and that there's no problem finding docs who are good English speakers. When we were in Mexico I felt that both Sarah and I received very good care. The healthcare system there is modeled after ours and the hospital where I delivered in Mexico City was excellent. Neither my OB nor Sarah's pedi spoke English as their first language, but they spoke English well enough that I was comfortable with them.
Developmental pediatrics is a medical specialty focusing on the assessment and treatment of children with developmental delays, developmental disabilities or chronic conditions effecting physical or emotional development, learning or behavior. (Can you tell I cut and pasted that definition?? )