c-section, "note" to surgeon

aluminium · August 2010

We're Team Green and worried that the surgeon or OR nurses will spoil the surprise at the last minute. Thinking about writing a message on my belly, something like: "Don't spoil the surprise. Please let us see for ourselves whether it's a boy or a girl!"

MagPie08 · August 2010

I'm confused. Do you want them to dangle the baby over your face so you can see for yourself? How can they 'spoil the surprise' once the baby is born?

ETA: if you have specific vision of how you'd like this to play out, I'd write it in your Birth Plan, not on your stomach.

FishNchips1 · August 2010

Tell them that as soon as you go into surgery.. I doubt they will let you leave a 'note' on your belly to tell them otherwise.

max1563 · August 2010

You can tell the doc to hold up the baby, and allow DH to look and then tell you. That is how my SIL did it with her twins.

LCB34 · August 2010

MagPie08:

I'm confused. Do you want them to dangle the baby over your face so you can see for yourself? How can they 'spoil the surprise' once the baby is born?

ETA: if you have specific vision of how you'd like this to play out, I'd write it in your Birth Plan, not on your stomach.

I agree. I don't get what is so wrong with the doctor pulling the baby out and announcing.

If you want to be demanding - make sure you let people know - but don't be surprised if things don't go according to your demands.

sassy0930 · August 2010

I agree with MagPie, the whole thing is that you get to hear the doctor say "it's a..." then you know. I've not heard of them not saying anything until you've SEEN the baby's genitals.

MassageMomma2010 · August 2010

Docs like to keep a sterile field and will probably not take to having to wipe off your note before getting started. I would tell everyone and anyone you see that day that you want to learn the sex by seeing your son/daughter.

mlc92404 · August 2010

In defense of the OP, I hear more and more woman talking about this. They dont want the Dr telling them the sex of the baby when it comes out (vaginal or c-sec), they want to wait till the baby is put on them or handed to them and find out themselves..

snansley · August 2010

Maybe the surgeon could cue your husband to look over the drape "Dad, want to tell us what it is?" Unless it is some sort of emergency, you will be awake and both you and DH will be able to talk to the medical personnel.

We are Team Green and I want my husband to announce it to me so I understand where you are coming from.

GRKaters · August 2010

Just tell them when you get in there--and remind them if you need to (or have DH do this!)--that DH wants to announce the sex. No big deal.

TexasLadyBug · August 2010

I think it would be better to just express your wishes to your Dr and your nursing staff when you arrive. If I was a Dr I would be pretty annoyed if I got all the way back to OR, ready to go and then have to wait for the staff to clean your belly to make a safe/sterile area.

nosoup4u · August 2010

snansley:
Maybe the surgeon could cue your husband to look over the drape "Dad, want to tell us what it is?" Unless it is some sort of emergency, you will be awake and both you and DH will be able to talk to the medical personnel.
We are Team Green and I want my husband to announce it to me so I understand where you are coming from.

Yeah, definitely remind them, have your DH remind them. I can't imagine it's a big deal, but you may have to be a bit pushy if they're used to announcing it.

tmbuchmann · August 2010

FishNchips1:
Tell them that as soon as you go into surgery.. I doubt they will let you leave a 'note' on your belly to tell them otherwise.

This is a stupid side-note but it reminded me of when my Grandma has surgery done she will write on herself with permament marker leaving the doctor notes. Like she had knee surgery this year she wrote on her good knee "Wrong Knee" and on the knee that was supposed to have the work done she wrote "Injured Knee." She's terrified that the doctor will screwup and operate on the wrong body part. (say parnoid??)

blondek8 · August 2010

Writing requests on your belly is stupid. Sorry, but it is. Just ask your OB and nursing staff prior to your section. However, don't be surprised if things don't go the way you've planned. Sh!t happens. In the end and in the grand scheme of life does it really matter who tells you the sex of the baby?

sweetadventure · August 2010

tmbuchmann:
FishNchips1:
Tell them that as soon as you go into surgery.. I doubt they will let you leave a 'note' on your belly to tell them otherwise.

This is a stupid side-note but it reminded me of when my Grandma has surgery done she will write on herself with permament marker leaving the doctor notes. Like she had knee surgery this year she wrote on her good knee "Wrong Knee" and on the knee that was supposed to have the work done she wrote "Injured Knee." She's terrified that the doctor will screwup and operate on the wrong body part. (say parnoid??)

Sadly, it isn't that paranoid. The wrong side gets operated on all the time. My friend's grandpa and my sister's coach both got knee surgery on the wrong leg.

hudsaunt1 · August 2010

So if they do tell you what you had, is it going to totally ruin your birthing experience? Are you going to claim that you had a tramautic birth experience because you couldn't see what your child was before you heard it? IMO ~ when DD hearing that I had a "healthy baby girl" was the best thing ever..especially since I didn't have my glasses on & my mom was taking her out of the OR right away to show my DH (who is a chicken sh!t).

Unknown · August 2010

This content has been removed.

argonne · August 2010

sweetadventure:
tmbuchmann:

FishNchips1:
Tell them that as soon as you go into surgery.. I doubt they will let you leave a 'note' on your belly to tell them otherwise.

This is a stupid side-note but it reminded me of when my Grandma has surgery done she will write on herself with permament marker leaving the doctor notes. Like she had knee surgery this year she wrote on her good knee "Wrong Knee" and on the knee that was supposed to have the work done she wrote "Injured Knee." She's terrified that the doctor will screwup and operate on the wrong body part. (say parnoid??)

Sadly, it isn't that paranoid. The wrong side gets operated on all the time. My friend's grandpa and my sister's coach both got knee surgery on the wrong leg.

I agree. Not paranoid at all. Actually, when you go in to have surgery done on a knee (or any other 'sided' body part), most doctor's will put huge X's on the side not needing surgery and you will get asked about 1,501,789 times which leg they are operating on by every single one of the medical staff that visits you.

red daisy · August 2010

rochella:
I don't know about you ladies, but I'm going to write my entire birth plan on my belly now. Though since, so far, I'm all set up for a vaginal delivery, maybe I should shave my pubes to say "no meds" and they'll get the point.
Sorry, OP! I'm not usually mean, just some fun at your expense... no need to do that, just express your wishes to your surgeon and nurses and DH.
And if it doesn't happen, well, hopefully a beautiful healthy baby in your arms will make you feel better about it.

This just made my whole day!

lysa3950 · August 2010

No one told us what we had after our c-section, nor did they hold him, up. My husband had to walk over to where the nurses were cleaning him up to find out, while I was laying on the table dying of curiousity.

tiggergirl0325 · August 2010

It's not going to piss them off to write it on the belly. They have to wash the belly anyway, so it's not giving them any extra work. Like others have said, patients are marked up for different surgeries all the time.

That being said, it's totally not necessary. Like others have said, you are going to be awake and can tell them. Don't be afraid to talk with the people in the room--it can be intimidating, but you will have a nurse prepping you and getting you ready and they are usually quite friendly. Just let them know your wishes and make sure to ask them to spread the word. Chances are it's not going to be an issue at all.

aluminium · August 2010

Thanks to those of you who read this with a sense of humor. The rest of you are uptight a-holes.

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