Infertility

The silver lining of IF...

I know that is a really strange to say, but our IF struggles have brought my DH and I closer together.  

I didn't think it was possible for us to be any closer, but we have gained such a strength in our marriage through this struggle.

Don't get me wrong, there are times that we disagree and do not see eye to eye on certain things, but I'm very proud of how we are so open with each other.  We discuss our sides and then find a way to meet in the middle.

We were having a pretty big discussion last night and we weren't coming to an agreement.  So after thinking about my side all day and trying to see his point of view (he did the same), we sat down this evening and finished our discussion.  There was such a relief when we finished because we managed to meet in the middle and resolve the issue. 

Has anybody else experienced this "silver lining" of IF with their DH, DW or SO?  Thanks for letting me share ;0)

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Re: The silver lining of IF...

  • Yes, I would say even though we have been through a lot less than many of you girls, that we are closer than before we began this journey. My DH is so supportive and understanding. I really could not ask for a better husband. I love that he supports me even when I am having "one of those days" and cry for no apparent reason. If there is anything good about IF, perhaps it is the fact that you learn to depend on eachother more than ever before.

    Thanks for the reminder!

    GL to you!

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  • I absolutely feel the same way. For us, the experience and trauma of going through our two losses brought us even closer than we ever had been (and we were together for 8 years before we got married - so we already knew how close were were to start). Now, in the 2 years since the losses and now struggling with IF and all of the testing, BFNs, unexplained diagnosis. ..it's only continued.

    now certainly we have our issues and problems and fights, but even when we do - we return to the fact that we've made it through this - and it grounds us a bit. 

     

    m/c#1 07/16/08 (11 weeks), m/c#2 10/10/08 (8 weeks). and then nothing since except every test possible (no answers). IUI#1 and #2: BFNs Super lucky to be buddies with Peetie. Our out of nowhere, surprise DD born 5/29/2011
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  • Totally agree. My DH has been my greatest supporter through all of this, and there are so many times I've felt so bad for putting us through IF. I know I can't blame myself...he is truly my best friend and has learned how to handle my emotional meltdowns.

    Arguments still occur, but they are different now, we have learned to let the petty things go and find a way to compromise, because in the end we both want the same thing.

    I know this is our path for a reason, but its easy to forget that. Thanks for showing me a little light in such a dark place!

  • Yes, dh and I say all of the time that IF has brought us closer together.

    I'm so glad that you and your dh have a silver lining :)

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    Unexplained Infertility

    After two Clomid cycles, three injectable IUI cycles, two IVFs, two miscarriages, and one lap surgery, IVF #2 has brought us our little boy!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    TTC #2
    After months of being postponed or cancelled, FET #1.3 (Natural FET) brought us twin girls!

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    Surprise! Baby #4 is due in March!
  • Yes. I absolutely agree! DH and I talk about it quite a bit. I did not know we could get any closer, but IF has definitely brought us closer and made our relationship stronger.
    DS #1: (Summer 2010) Gonal-F, Ovidrel, Endometrin & B2B IUIs (Hail Mary Cycle) DC #2&3: IVF #1 (November 2011) Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
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