Parenting after 35
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it happened AGAIN!
For the second time this year, I got asked by a stranger if my girls were my GRANDDAUGHTERS!!! I am 42, but don't feel 42, but I must really look AT LEAST 42. I have decided that I MUST make some changes in my appearance. I know I need to lose weight (kept the weight from baby #2, and added a bit)--I'm beyond pudgy. I can work on that. Hair is long, but I wear it twisted up in a clip pretty much all the time--time for a REAL haircut? Super round face, even when thin, it's round--what EASY hairstyle might work? I always tell the hairstylist (the once or twice a year that I go to one) to just trim it, and keep the length so I can, you guessed it, put it up on my head! I've NEVER had short hair--never shorter than shoulder length. Make up is minimal, but I do still wear it--blush, eye liner, mascara, lipstick--I don't think it's the makeup. Anyone else going through this? It didn't happen with my first one--I had her at 38 and folks couldn't believe I was 38. No one has that disbelieving look now when I tell them I'm 42--does having 2 kids REALLY age a woman?? I need to capitalize on this feeling of "change" I'm having right now--hope I don't wimp out! Encouragement needed!
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Re: it happened AGAIN!
I think people are just getting ruder (and dumber!) It probably has nothing to do with how gorgeous I'm sure you are- it has more to do with their lack of ettiquette!
That said, I think confidence is one of the most attractive things a person can 'wear'. Regardless of your haircut or size or makeup, if you feel good it will show through.
So if you want to change things up and go for a new style for yourself then go for it Momma! But dont do it because some dimwit was rude to you...
I am sorry! That sucks, that someone made you feel bad about yourself! But if you are ready for a little change, then go ahead! But do it because you want to.
I think that is the only place I spend my money on is my hair - that I will find a way to fit in our budget!!!! I have to cover my gray's ; ) I am dreading the day when I need to cut my hair - how old is too old to have long hair???? I figure I will do it when my kids are old enough that I have time to blow dry it straight in the morning ; )
Wow. that's just plain rude of them. Sorry you had to go through that.
If you want to make a change, then do it for you, not for rude and silly people who probably will be grandmothers themselves at 42.
Have you considered a pixie cut? I think it's an adorable, modern look that can suit most face shapes. That, or some version of a bob. I have this now and it's really easy - just wash and go.
Don't feel too badly. It was probably some white trash idiot who became a parent at 14 and never learned that you should be an adult before reproducing.
(((((((hugs)))))))
Hear! Hear!
And I agree with everyone who said make any changes to your appearance for YOU and not because of morons who can't watch their tongues.
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Thanks everyone for the uplifting words! I don't think the lady said it to intentionally be mean--it was "oh, your granddaughters are so cute!". To me it was a wake-up call--bottom line, to complete strangers, I look older than I am. It is important to me to project an image that matches how I feel--I don't feel 42 (most days!). I do want to make some changes. Thanks for the encouragement to make those changes for the right reasons!
FWIW--I do have a couple of friends my age who are grandmothers, one is a grandmother 4 times over! So I know it's not out of the realm of possibility to be a grandmother at my age--I just picture my 75 year-old mother when I hear "grandmother".
I'm sure you don't look like a grandmother--people just don't think before they speak.
I have a round face, too, and I usually get a chin length bob. My hair is really straight and thick, so it has to be layered well or it just hangs there, but if the cut is good I can wash and go. I used to get into ponytail ruts for months at a time, so that was part of the reason I started getting it cut a little shorter. I need to get a maintenance cut every 2 months to keep it looking okay.
I'm 42 and silver, so I totally understand. What about bangs? Not "soccer mom" bangs, but either go heavy, like Chrissy Hynde, or wee pixie bangs, like Audrey Hepburn. Distinctive bangs are a big style move, to me, and I think going for personal style over "flattering to an older face" is actually the more youthful option. Also, that way you can try out a smaller change and keep your ponytail before deciding to go big.
You could also do one of my favorite, favorite looks with bangs. I used to do this but I can't since I committed to silver. Bleach out the underside of your bangs, or a stripe or two on one side, and dye it an awesome, fun color, like blue or purple. I did black plus various different colors for a long time, I loved it. It depends on what color the rest of your hair is.
ANYway. You know best, and I am sure you look way better than you think you do.
This. I was going to suggest a bob also - if YOU want to change. We have a couple of regulars who post and have round shaped faces and look super cute w/bobs.