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I feel like a bad mom...

PrincessLinLinPrincessLinLin
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Whenever my DH is home he always asks "do you wanna feed/change/hold DS?" and my answer is almost ALWAYS "no, you can do it this time" I just feel like I do this stuff all the time when DH isn't home so when he is I just want a break. The other day DS would NOT stop fussing no matter what, so when DH walked in the door I handed him LO and walked out the door, got in my car and left. I came back after 30 minutes of just driving around to a sleeping baby and DH making dinner. Am I a bad mommy for wanting a break?
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Re: I feel like a bad mom...

  • sugarland726sugarland726 member

    I don't think that makes you a bad mom. I usually ask DH to change her diapers when he gets home from work since I do them all day. Wanting a break is totally normal. I would just try and make sure that DH had a chance to decompress from his day as well before throwing a crying baby at him.

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  • poolrat00poolrat00
    Nope. I want one everyday, and I know DH will too once I got back to work and he's work from home/take baby to work daddy. I've never left but I plan to for an hour or two soon, I just started pumping so DH can feed LO if he needs to.
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  • jennygirlmtjennygirlmt member
    No! You need a break! Honestly, after being at work all day I think a DH needs some bonding time with LO.  And a burnout mom is a bad mom.  So feel free to hand the baby over and drive around, go to the mall, read in the tub!
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  • RitaT22RitaT22 member
    No, you are not a bad mom. DH works 24 hour shifts so I take care of DS by myself a lot. As soon as he comes home I ask him to tend to him for almost everything except feeding (I am breast feeding). The sucky part for me is he takes naps with DS almost every day he's home, and then I'm stuck doing housework. Still trying to figure out my way around that one.
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  • palukapantspalukapants member

    I don't think so.  I think it is normal to need a break, and afterall you have been home all day caring for your baby.  I do the same thing when my hubbs comes home.  I too have the feelings of being a bad mom but everyone tells me it is ok to take a break.  Take care:)

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  • Pytko7Pytko7
    We all deserve to take a break!  My mom was staying with us once in a while the first few weeks to help with anything I needed. And I still love Dh to just bond with DD.  Nothing like having time to shower and enjoy it or even clean the house and not have to think bout LO.  Hey they get a break by going to work, were working 27-7 just not getting paid in $ but love.  My DH works alot to help with the income im not getting and we get about as much sleep.  The first day he complained he was tired I wanted to hit him, he gets more than I do.
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  • adcffaaadcffaa member
    It does not make you abad mommy to want/need a break. We all have our breaking points and having a new LO can get us to those points very quickly. Take time for yourself every so often just to do whatever you feel like doing. Maybe a little pampering?  now matter how short or long ALL mommies need a break from LO. Even if its just 5 minutes.
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  • Kerianne1176Kerianne1176

    No No No and No.  I am doing it alone since I left my husband in my 7th month of pregnancy and LO is 2 months old.  I live with my parents and they help out a lot when they can but they dont do overnights and really its only a couple hours in the evening when they will take him while I shower or because they want to play with him and I can try to get some stuff done or take a 10 minute walk by myself around the block to clear my head.....By the time that time comes, I practically THROW LO at them! hehehe. To have any break as a new mom is a gift!  I dont consider myself a bad mom because once in a while I like to hand over the responsibility to someone else for an hour or two and I dont think you should either.

    Everyone needs a break...infants are draining and there is no easing into it...we have the baby and POW we are on the job 24/7.  Give yourself a break and a pat on the back for everything you are doing! You deserve it!

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  • kirkettekirkette member

    No, that makes you human. You need to take breaks. 

    There's no special award for moms who work so hard that they burn themselves out.  

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  • Mere7706Mere7706 member

    No way... this week was the first time I went out without the boys. I went out Wednesday to do some gift shopping that would have taken me 5 hours if I had the boys- I was shopping for 2 hours with lots of different ins and outs of the car. Then Thursday I went out for coffee with a friend, I had B with me but he slept most of the time and I didn't mind sitting there holding him, knowing I was out in public with a friend for a nice visit.

    I feel so much better knowing I had those breaks to shop and socialize. (we don't get many visitors here at the house since we live out of the way for most people)

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