Time out for tantrums?

JillRock96 · July 2010

Do you do this?

At Ava's age, I generally only do time-out for serious, dangerous behavior (like hitting, or if she doesn't listen when I tell her not to touch cords, etc.). But, she has been throwing monster tantrums lately. My psych background tells me that if I don't give her attention or feed into the tantrum at all, she will stop. However, this DOES.NOT.WORK. We've been consistently ignoring tantrums for months, and they will continue for a good 20+ minutes. I'm wondering if I should try time-outs for the really big tantrums -- though wouldn't that just make them worse?

Thanks for your input.

ela81 · July 2010

We put Isabel in her pnp for big tantrums! I know some don't agree with using things like pnps for time out but it has not caused a problem for us. I almost think it help, she's happy in her pnp. When I put her in her pnp she stops having her tantrum on as few as several seconds as long as a couple of minutes.

tina623 · July 2010

We ignore all tantrums. Even the ones that keep going..unless there were other behaviors and we've reached the "that's it!" point. Then she gets picked up, put in her bedroom on her bed and we shut the door. They usually calm themselves down and read some books which are in a basket at the foot of their beds. A time out may help her.

tina623 · July 2010

Is she throwing more tantrums because of the babies? If that's the case, I don't know what you should do. I assume you are taking time for her but I've heard girls react to new siblings worse than boys do. I have no experience with this. I hope it stops soon.

JillRock96 · July 2010

tina623:
Is she throwing more tantrums because of the babies? If that's the case, I don't know what you should do. I assume you are taking time for her but I've heard girls react to new siblings worse than boys do. I have no experience with this. I hope it stops soon.

I think part of it is the age -- she gets so frustrated when she can't tell us what she wants or when she can't get something to work the way she wants it to. But yes, they have definitely increased in frequency since the twins' arrival. She gets a ton of one-on-one time with us (including swim and gymboree classes every week and lots of solo outings with me to run errands), so I don't think there is anything else we can do in that respect....

Mrs.Reem · July 2010

One of the books I read (or maybe it was the instructions for our timeout pad??) said not to do timeout for "big emotions." Going by that I would say no, but we have the same problem. Katen is persistent and not a quitter. She could go on for hours... The one and only thing I've found is to let her do it for a while with me ignoring her, then start acting goofy and make her laugh. Usually I'll ask her, "what's your name? Gertrude? Oh no that's not it. Jimbo?? and act like an all out idiot. That seems to pop her out of it.

I've also noticed that if I don't get the kid a little something to eat at least every 2 hours, she's worse.

DavezWife · July 2010

My Ava is easily distracted, so her trantrums are super short, until I show her something shiny, lol.

However, giving her a couple minutes to loose her marbles and then I work with her to take deep breaths and blow on my face. Usually that ends it. But again, she's SUPER distractable.

JillRock96 · July 2010

Thanks, ladies!

We've been working on the blowing thing when she gets upset to help her take deeper breaths (and to distract her). Sometimes she gets SO upset that she really can't calm herself down. In those situations, a time-out would definitely just exacerbate it. And Mrs.Reems, we have the same problem with low blood sugar and tantrums -- I think Ava takes after her mama. Wink

EastCoastBride · July 2010

Totally OT, but I was reading your ticker WAY wrong. Ava's says she is 1 yr, 8 months old. So w/ the twins, I read it that they were 9 months old.

I did the calculations and I was like "How did she get PG IMMEDIATELY after having Ava?!".

Then I read them again. Phew.

browneyedgrl4282 · July 2010

JillRock96:

tina623:
Is she throwing more tantrums because of the babies? If that's the case, I don't know what you should do. I assume you are taking time for her but I've heard girls react to new siblings worse than boys do. I have no experience with this. I hope it stops soon.

I think part of it is the age -- she gets so frustrated when she can't tell us what she wants or when she can't get something to work the way she wants it to. But yes, they have definitely increased in frequency since the twins' arrival. She gets a ton of one-on-one time with us (including swim and gymboree classes every week and lots of solo outings with me to run errands), so I don't think there is anything else we can do in that respect....

I really think it is the age! I am dealing with the samethingw ith Preston! We do the one on one time as well! When they nasty tantrums we do timeout! He is a different boy when he comes out of timeout! As for girls acting to new sibling we have the exact opposite here! Jordana is wonderful with the baby till this day! Preston wants to push him over and smack him!

Courted · July 2010

Yes we resoted to doing this. I bought a "thinking chair" and when Nico starts throwing a tamtrums because he did not get his way or something (I do not do it when he is fristrated because he can not communicate) then I put him in the chair for 1 minute. He will cry and scream but stay in the chair. Usually by the end of the minute he has stopped screaming and I will let him out. He seems be understanding this concept.

firsttogo · July 2010

We give time outs for more of discipline things, but with tantrums, I will put him in a different area and tell him that he needs a break until he gets it together....I use the term break, so it is certainly different from a time out KWIM?

Want a personalized experience?

Time out for tantrums?

Re: Time out for tantrums?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards