Baby Showers
qme09
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Registry Etiquette
qme09
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in Baby Showers
I am being thrown two showers, one by family, and one by friends. I live far away from my family, so this seems okay. But lots of people have asked about a registry, and pretty much bugged the heck out of me about it. I ended up making one, with the things I'll actually need, not so much cutesy extras and whatnot, but I worry that its rude to request anything? I know lots of people have registries, but I feel awkward about telling people what I want, especially since baby things are so costly. I don't want to ask for things I don't need, but on the other hand, the things I need are expensive. I made the registry and all, but now I want to delete it, because I feel so weird about it. Is it rude to ask for the things I need? What is it okay to ask for?
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Re: Registry Etiquette
some people just need a registry so they can get an idea of what you want/need. It's not a bad thing. Put only what you want/need on there.
I will admit to you that on our registry, I marked things like a bottle warmer and a bottle sterilizer "purchased" so people could think that we already had them. Truthfully, we just didn't want those things (we did it with a few other things, too), and it we didn't receive them!
others don't like to look at a registry, so you'll still get tons of random stuff from those people - because they think they know what you need.
Registries are helpful and eventhough you have one people will get you what they want to get you. They only faux paux that I see that bothers me is multiple big items. For example three or four travel systems, two or more breast pumps or cribs and changing tables. THAT really irks me. Just be practical and no one will bat an eye. HTH
Here's what would make registires "rude" - if you told people w/o being asked "Here's where I registered. I want you to get me a gift, and it has to be off of this. I dont' care if only expensive stuff is left over - I expect everyone to buy off of it and buy everything. If you dont' but off of it, I will return whatever you give me because it's not specifically what I wanted.".
If you aren't doing this, then all it is is a "wish list". Just letting people know what you want and need. And many people LIKE using them (I do!) because they want to make sure they really help you out and get you set up.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
i found that most people love to give gifts to babies. if people are asking where you are registered, that's saying a lot. i know some people are more givers than takers, but it's not rude at all to register (at least in my area and circle of friends). as a guest, i'd rather give someone something that they wanted and needed. it reduces chance of duplicate gifts. it's also very convenient for the guests since they can also have the option of having it shipped by ordering online if they are not able to make the shower.
we pretty much got everything we registered for. our family got us most of the big items and our friends bought the rest. and we reciprocate, so it's all good
Registries are perfectly acceptable and honestly make the guest's life easier. If the guest doesn't want to shop from the registry, they don't have too, but if they do, it gives them a place to start.
The way I see it, anything you need in the first year is fare game. Yes there are a lot of expensive items, but there are less expensive ones as well, like recieving blankets, bottles, nipples, safety items, etc.
You want to make sure that the registry has a variety of items and price ranges. Mine is about half items $15 or under, 1/4 items $40-$15, and the last 1/4 are the more expensive items with only a few being over $100.
TTC#2 October 2011. June 2012 diagnosed with mild PCOS and both tubes blocked.
10/1/12 miracle BFP 11/12/12 missed m/c (9w2d), baby stopped growing at 7 weeks
1/16/13 BFP, EDD 9/27/13, m/c 1/19/13
2/12/13 BFP, EDD 10/25/13 Please stick little one
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Why did you even bother registering for things if you didn't want or need them and were just going to mark them as "purchased"? I don't get the concept behind that.
Why did you even bother registering for things if you didn't want or need them and were just going to mark them as "purchased"? I don't get the concept behind that.
If my InLaws had their way, I'd register for my birthday and Christmas. They like to be given an exact list of what I need/want.
Our registry is going to be a list of everything we plan to buy. If family wants to help, great. If they don't, eh, not worried, I get a completion coupon.
Also note: none of my friends have babies yet so I doubt they would have any idea what to buy me without a registry.