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Doesn't listen at all...

megan0071234megan0071234
in Northern California Babies

We are really having a lot of trouble with DD listening and I am afraid that eventually she is going to get hurt because of it. Mainly, my problem is that we tell her to come here or stop & she immediately runs away or does whatever she is doing at a more rapid pace (like jumping on the bed).

She has already fallen off the bed and almost was hit by a car because she was running away. She just laughs & keeps going. Yesterday, I had to move the garbage can outside because she kept trying to climb in it.

Our house is safe, and other than things like the garbage or jumping on the bed, she really would have to try to get hurt. But, she acts this way in public, and I am really afraid that she will climb a bookshelf that isnt anchored to the wall or run in front of a car that doesn't see her.

She is just turning two tomorrow, if that makes a difference. I never had these issues with DS- she is 100% his opposite.

Does anyone have any tips or advice on what I can do?

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Re: Doesn't listen at all...

  • scrapmama2201scrapmama2201

    It would be so much easier if they came with a pause button. Or a mute button. Or a power button.

    I try, but not always successfully, to give two options to a no. You can't jump off the bed, but we can make a pile of pillows and you can jump off of them OR you can jump on your trampoline. It's easy to forget that they need to be taught the appropriate behavior in place of the undesired one.

    At age 2, we had no kitchen chairs in our house, no coffee table. All climable objects were removed until he learned not to climb.

    As for running away, we had to rely on the stroller many many many times. Even for short walks into a store. If he ran, in the stroller he went. One chance. It was a stressful stage, but he eventually got it.

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  • Mrs_ShmoopieMrs_Shmoopie
    imagescrapmama2201:

    It would be so much easier if they came with a pause button. Or a mute button. Or a power button.

    I try, but not always successfully, to give two options to a no. You can't jump off the bed, but we can make a pile of pillows and you can jump off of them OR you can jump on your trampoline. It's easy to forget that they need to be taught the appropriate behavior in place of the undesired one.

    At age 2, we had no kitchen chairs in our house, no coffee table. All climable objects were removed until he learned not to climb.

    As for running away, we had to rely on the stroller many many many times. Even for short walks into a store. If he ran, in the stroller he went. One chance. It was a stressful stage, but he eventually got it.

    I think the part I bolded is so key.  I repeatedly remind myself (sometimes many times a day.  And sometimes many, many times an hour!) that we're building an entire human being from scratch.  DS needs to be taught the most basic things which is sometimes very obvious and sometimes not so much.  They don't necessarily know that it's not okay to jump on the bed or that no means no.  We also try to do what scrapmama suggested where we give two options in place of what he can't do. 

    In terms of running when out in public, luckily this hasn't been a huge, huge challenge for us so far.   When we're out in public in certain places (like parking lots, crowded places) we've told him, "Do you want to walk and hold mommy's hand (or sit in the stroller) or do you want me to carry you?"  We sometimes have battles where he doesn't want to hold our hand and tries to wiggle away but then we just pick him up and deal w/the tantrum.  When he's calmed down we tell him, "If you want to walk then you need to hold our hand.  Otherwise I will pick you up and carry you (or put you in the stroller)."   That's helped although it has definitely been a process and sometimes he still forgets. 

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  • megan0071234megan0071234

    Thank you for the advice. She is just so different from my son who always wanted to be right there holding my hand. I know she hates the stroller or her harness in public, but overall it is safer for her to be restrained. We will just deal with the tantrums.

    My parents are buying her a small trampoline with a handle for her birthday this weekend, so I am hoping that will be a good substitute for her bed.

    Thanks again.

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  • amyfeliceamyfelice
    I agree with the advice you got and of course have not reached that stage yet, but your siggy pic is so funny in the context of this post :) Good luck. I am not looking forward to this stage! 
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  • megan0071234megan0071234
    Maybe we need a crate at our house! We were at a party at my sisters & she literally spent the whole time playing in that thing. She put all her toys & snacks in it & just had so much fun. It is pretty funny since she is so wild. Everyone at the party found it pretty ironic that as soon as she found the dog crate, that is where she wanted to be.
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  • amyfeliceamyfelice
    I'm sure the novelty would wear off quickly! but it's super cute. 
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