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BM taking SS away for a year

junebugs345junebugs345
in Blended Families

DH was told last night that BM wants to take SS away with her for a year.  She just finished her dance teacher qualifications and got an offer for a paying internship but she will have to move off island and wants to take SS with her. DH is crushed but I think it will be good for SS to get time with her as she has been away at school for 4 years now, only returning 3 times a year.  SS is extremely attached to DH so we're worried about how he will transition.  We've talked about getting Skype but that's about as much as we can do as travelling there to see SS will not be possible. Any advice on how we can make the transition easier for SS? 

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Re: BM taking SS away for a year

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    McNurseyMcNursey

    SS lives with you full time and has for the last four years, right? Is there a CO in place saying who has custody? Do you feel this is in your SS best interest? From what I've come to see the wants of a mother are not always in the best interest of a child.

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    paris.inthe.springparis.inthe.spring
    Where would she be taking him and where are you, that you would not be able to go visit even once in a year?
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    paris.inthe.springparis.inthe.spring
    Also how many sk's, and bm's are we dealing with here? Is this the same SS that hurt your feelings?
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    junebugs345junebugs345

    I have 2 SSs and there are 2 BMs.  The previous post was about SS#2, this post is about SS#1.  BM has full custody but there is an oral agreement that SS spends every other week with us, which he has done for the last 3 years.  SS will be back to visit for Christmas and Easter but it will be very difficult for us to visit him b/c of our financial situation at the moment.

     

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    DREWLILYDREWLILY
    So there is a CO in place or no? Oral agreements don't count for much. Most CO's have clauses in them about moving. How old is SS? If he is school age, then travelling for a year doesn't really sound plausible. And who would be looking after him while BM is working and travelling?
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    junebugs345junebugs345
    There is no CO in place.  Where we live, the BM has full custodial rights if the parents are not married when the baby is born (unless you can prove she is unfit).  SS is 7.  We don't know what the arrangements will be, as she has yet to let us know.
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