I swear everyone found out their babies sex today IRL. My twin sister was no exception, she is having a girl. Isabella Jane is her name, 10 fingers, 10 toes, the u/s tech said she looks perfect.
I think I have been holding up real well. If I cry, it's in private. No one who knew about my m/c asks how I'm doing, and it's only been two weeks (found out three weeks ago). The only person that cared enough to write me a card was my sister's mother in law. So coming home from the big reveal at dinner my H asked me if I was OK, I told him this was really difficult. All I could think about at that moment was the big blood spot on the pad in my underwear at the moment... that was remains of my baby... I bursted out crying in the car, something I haven't done. And all I could remember him saying was, "This is common", not in a caring understanding way, but in a get over it kind of way.
I just feel like a HUGE failure right now, and no one seems to realize I'm completely empty inside. Ridiculously empty & completely depressed. I just keep faking these "I'm OK" & "I'm so happy for my sister" emotions.

Re: So today was a REALLY difficult day
I am so sorry!
My sister who has a 3 month old, just told me she's trying again, and if she gets pregnant before me, I know I'll turn into the best liar in the world, telling her I'm happy for her.
As for people asking how your doing or sending cards, I get jealous too when I see girls who say they had cards, flowers, and dinners pouring in! I got two cards, one from a distant aunt and one from my moms coworker. My MIL was great during the m/c, but now I agree that no one really asks anymore now that it's been 3 weeks.
Again, I am so sorry you are feeling this way. Know that every women on this board has felt that way towards someone and it's not strange. I am SO thankful for this board because just when I begin to feel alone, someone else pulls me up and shares a similar emotion to show me this is normal!
I couldn't have said it better.
I really hope tomorrow (and all your tomorrows) is better than today. (((Hugs)))
We love and miss you Jillian (18w) and Peanut (6w). Welcome to our TAC miracle Jacob!
TTC#1 since May 2009
PCOS * Hypothyroid
Bean - BFP May 26, 2010. EDD Feb 3, 2011. Natural Miscarriage 8w5d - June 29, 2010.
Pumpkin - BFP Feb 8, 2011. EDD Oct 21, 2011. Natural Miscarriage 6w3d - Feb 28, 2011.
May 2015: IUI#2 - nada.
Thanks ladies. BTW, when I said "no one seems to realize..." I meant IRL. I know you guys all understand, and I thank all of you for your empathy! You all are WONDERFUL!