Fear of not being able to handle two kids...?

jaybird44 · July 2010

I've always wanted a big family, my husband and I have always talked about wanting 4 kids...now I'm pregnant with #2 and I'm freaking out that I can't do it...

it could be that I'm really sick with this pregnancy and really tired but I am just really worried I can't hack it...not to mention doing it again for a 3rd or 4th! How do you do it?

lwrigley2000 · July 2010

I have the same fear and I'm not even pregnant with #2 yet.

macchiatto · July 2010

Not to be flippant, but you just do it. You'll figure it out once they come. The nice thing is, you've been through it all before with one baby, so at least you'll somewhat know what you're doing with the next one!

mrs.bridgettkay · July 2010

Like PP said, you just do it. I think going from 1 to 2 is a lot easier than going from none to 1. I feel more relaxed this time around. It's tiring but DH is a great help. I tell myself that someday I'll be able to sit and relax.

iloveclayton · July 2010

I agree with the ladies, everyone always asks how I handle it with twins. You just do it. Its not as hard as you might be afraid it is. Just breath and and when things get out of control just take a minute and remember those babies need you and you are more than capable to do anything.

Paris05 · July 2010

Crap I can't handle the one I got

Yes I am very fearful and I am not even pregnant yet

Echowysp · July 2010

I go through waves of "Yes, I *can* handle this" to "What the &$% were we thinking??" and then back again.

I figure it will all work out and I'll have good days and bad days. Just like with any transitions.

2bejunebride06 · July 2010

I have this same concern. We want to have 3, but now that #2 is on its way, I'm nervous. No turning back now! I have faith that it will all work out, I just worry about keeping my sanity!

Sunkiss028 · July 2010

You seriously just kind of do it! Just like everything fell into place and you knew what to do when you had your first one, same goes with number two. It was an adjustment having a 2nd, but not nearly as bad as I thought. I am in this place right now with deciding about number 3, I really want another one, DH doesn't. He is a cop so I get 75% of parenting duties and that scares me to add another...though I still really want one!

janjag · July 2010

macchiatto:
Not to be flippant, but you just do it. You'll figure it out once they come. The nice thing is, you've been through it all before with one baby, so at least you'll somewhat know what you're doing with the next one!

this. and also, you are not feeling so great right now. when you're not pg it'll be totally different.

lite-bright · July 2010

The first two months were really hard for me, TBH. I had a c/s this time and a longer, tougher recovery. Plus, I couldn't nap with the baby this time around b/c I had my toddler to handle during the days, and DD1 no longer naps regularly.

But DD2 started sleeping 6-8 hour stretches at two months and is generally an easier baby than DD1 was -- and I thought DD1 was pretty easy! I feel like I've got a pretty good handle on things most days at this point, although evenings can still be rough and the sleep deprivation still has me on the edge of zombie-dom every time DD2 has a bad night. But BFing is easier and the whole newborn thing seems a lot easier b/c I feel like I know how to handle most things/what to expect. I think the hardest thing now is that I don't feel like either girl gets as much one-on-one attention/activities as DD1 is used to -- but that's inevitable. And it's awesome to see their relationship developing already -- DD1 brings toys to DD2 to share, and DD2 thinks DD1 is hilarious and fascinating to watch.

DH and I still aren't sure if we can handle three. At least now, one of us can take each girl or we can trade off if one is asleep!

DEBBIE33CASEY · July 2010

I have the same fear- don't worry you're not alone. I originally wanted 4 kids as well but everyone around me has been actually trying to talk me out of it- and i'm starting to buy it. I can't imagine lugging around 2 kids to run my errands when it's already hard for me to do it with just 1!

jason&robin · July 2010

I have really had to count on DH. We really have to tag team them. I have always grabbed DD and DH grabs DS. As time went on, we developed a good plan and we sort of stick to the same routine. It's not so bad. There are moments when both kids have lost their cool and I am frazzled but most of the time, it's pretty manageable. Like the other ladies have said, you just figure it out!

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