I think I'm new here...
vera1127
member
Well, I'm definitely new here, but possibly here to stay. My son is 8 months old, and I'm just now realizing that all of the emotions I've been feeling, the strain on my marriage, the problems with my parents, the list goes on...are PPD. I think I've been in denial that what I've been feeling is actually depression. It hit me last night when DH and I, on our anniversary, got into a huge blowout fight and I just cried and cried and cried and couldn't stop. I even shared with him the thoughts I have had of seeing DS thrown into water (not something I would EVER do nor do I have a desire to do, but the terrifying images still make their way into my head). It scared him. I felt like a crazy woman. I still do. I feel like this isn't my life. Although I love DS terribly, I am starting to feel detached from him. My dr's office opens at 8am and I am calling them right away hoping to get an appt with whoever I can today. I am semi-ashamed yet relieved to be here.
A couple of questions for those of you "experienced" PPD-ers. How did the appointment go? What medication, if any, were you put on? Did you go to therapy/counseling as well or just medication? I am so nervous.
Re: I think I'm new here...
You made the most difficult step - congrats. Admitting it to myself was so incredibly difficult. Then I was so nervous going to the OB. My BP was through the roof! When my MW walked into the room, I just busted out crying. Mostly out of relief because I knew things were going to get better at that point. My biggest piece of advice to you is DON'T HOLD ANYTHING BACK. No matter how silly it makes you feel or how "stupid" it makes you feel. Tell your OB exactly everything that you have been thinking and feeling. That is the only way you can get the exact help that you need. Walking out of her office I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders just because someone else knew. Someone told me that things could get better. I was put on Zoloft - and it worked wonders for me. I was diagnosed right before my son turned 7 months. I did not go to counselling because the medication worked so well for me. I know many ladies on here do go to counselling though, and it works very well for them. GL, and lean on us anytime you need to! Good luck at your appointment. Let us know how it goes!!!!
First off, congrats on taking that first step! Its hard to accept that something may actually be wrong. I think women in general try so hard to be strong all the time, but I've finally learned that its ok to not be ok sometimes!
I was just diagnosed with PPD last week. My daughter is 5 months old and I think i was in denial for awhile there. But my appointment went well, it was actually a relief to finally get it out there and realize that I am not going crazy! My dr put me on Lexapro 10 mg a day. I am on day 6 and already starting to feel better. The first few days were rough, the side effects I experienced were intense anxiety, dry mouth, tired ALL the time, and nausea. But those have went away for the most part.
Good luck to you, I'm sure you will be fine. You've already taken that first step, so its all uphill from here!