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2nd Trimester
jmmiller28
member
My Mom Is A Jerk
jmmiller28
member
Let me preface this with the fact that I love my mom dearly.....but.....the other day she saw me and greeted me with "Hey there CHUBBY!" Yeah. My own mother. Granted, she's never been good at the whole motherly/nurturing thing but I was totally aghast. First of all, I am not chubby. I've gained 8 pounds thus far. Secondly, I'm pregnant and who on EARTH that is even remotely close to me says that?! I politely told her that I found that incredibly offensive but she just laughed and said "oh what? I can't say that to my own daughter? I am just teasing you, Chubby." And she continues to say it every time she sees me. I am floored. Any suggestions on what to say to her or how to re-educate her on the stupidity/incredibly hurtful nature of her comment???"
This discussion has been closed.
Re: My Mom Is A Jerk
I don't have any suggestions, but have to tell you that you're not alone. My mom asked me if my belly was fat or baby. It's probably both...but there is a lot of baby at this point. She lifts up my shirt and jiggles my stomach. Not okay, Mom. Not okay.
Then my dad tells me that my hips look like they've gotten "even wider." Seriously, wtf? I told him that his beer belly had gotten "even bigger" and it looked like he was further along than I am.
I'm sorry she's hurting your feelings. Unfortunately it sounds like this issue will get worse before it gets better if you choose to pursue it.
When she said "Hi there chubby" I would reply "What's up fatty?"
Maybe she would get the hint then. I already call her old so that wouldn't work.
While baby sleeps I'm roaming random boards
My mom took to calling me "Fat Girl" while I was pg. When I'd tell her it was mean or I was hurt, she responded exactly like your mom. She'd say "Well you ARE fat but for a good reason so why are you so upset?" Um, yeeeahhhh.
You should just do the same thing back to her. Lift her shirt and jiggle her belly.
I'm sorry but I think you're being overly sensitive. When I saw my mom this weekend she called me "chubby bunny" and I didn't think twice about it. I know my mom loves me and doesn't actually think I'm fat so really what's the big deal.
Have to agree, I find this a common trend on these forums, people are always very offended by peoples comments about their weight, I understand their are some stupid people out there, and strangers/ acquaintences especially should really hold some comments to themsleves. But truly, if there is ever a time to be cool with being fat it's now! When we are pregnant and can be proud of the weight, lot's of people out there are dying to have what you have, even if they don't look like a supermodel doing it. No ( healthy) woman should be happy to be pregnant and have someone tell them they haven't gained an ounce.
My DH and I joke all the time that hopefully this is baby I have gained and not Rolo ( my favorite chocolate craving lately) and frankly it's probably a bit of both, but 6 months from now, I'll be losing alot easier than I was 6 months ago, so better now than another time! It is the one time that when someone tells you you have gained weight, look at them with a big smile and be happy and proud and excited you are growing with baby! It just means you are one step closer to having that healthy well fed baby! ( of course we all know there is a limit of excess, but it doesn't mean you should be ashamed to be gaining weight at all) Chill out smile and realize they are not looking at you in disugust when they see your weight gain, it healthy natural and MANY people think BEAUTIFUL!
On a second note, maybe I'm old school, but you NEVER disrespect / talk about your mother regardless of what she may say. If you have expressed to her that you would like her to stop, there isn't much more you can do other than stop talking/visiting her. But I completely disagree with the other posters who recommended saying something smart back to your mom. I know that if I said anything close to what was posted above my mother would slap me into tomorrow. While it may seem harsh, I would do the same to my child if they disrespected me like some of the posters recommended.