For those of you that don't know. My in laws arrived on Tuesday. How it began was that my MIL called an hour before her arrival time to make sure we were still picking her up. DH asked if the train was running late and she said no. Well we get to the train station and the train is running 40 minutes late. She had to know that because we saw DH's step brother with his family get off the train and he said that he knew that his train was an hour behind and that he had already called his business partner. DH called his mom to ask her why she didn't tell us since we had the baby and we had to pick up Mya at her bus stop from camp and she said that she wasn't paying attention. (Keep in mind we saw DH's step brother for about 1 minute and they live in CA.)
At about 4pm, I start discussing what everyone wants for supper so I can get it started. MIL informs me that the stepbrother and his family want to go out to dinner (they were supposed to be here for the week, but we were also informed during this time that they were only in Providence for one night and they were going to Boston for the rest of the week). FIL said that they would call when they were done with their meeting. Well 5pm comes around, Mya is starving and no phone call. Plus I need to get stuff done. I have FIL call them to see what the plan is and I suggested going to the Cheesecake Factory, Dave and Busters, and all of the nice restaurants at the mall since we needed to drive 2 cars in and they have the parking garage. They finally call back at 6pm saying that those restaurants basically weren't good enough and they started naming all of these restaurants that need reservations, you must get dressed up, and they don't allow children. I lost it on them and they didn't understand why. I told them about these restaurants ahead of time and why we couldn't go there that night and they didn't care. They expected me to sit on the outside deck at one of the restaurants at 7:30pm at night. All they cared about was theirselves. Needless to say, I didn't go and Mya got food from Olive Garden to eat.
DH didn't understand why I was so upset with them and it was only the first day, but he soon figured out why. Yesterday, I was expected to be their maid. FIL wanted a cup of coffee. I showed him how to use the Keurig and he then said to me, "Well aren't you going to make it?" I told him I showed him so if he wanted another one he would know how to do it since I have things to do. Anything they wanted, either myself or DH was expected to get it for them. Including serving them lunch and supper, putting it in their plate, cleaning up everything including their plates, cups, etc. from the table. They didn't even offer to help.
I had to basically force them to hold Ava so I could get something done and if they thought that she went to the bathroom they would yell for me to change her diaper. There are no motherly instincts to go and do it theirselves or to do anything with her besides hold her and put her to sleep. I have been working with DH (that has no previous baby experience) on how to change diapers, feed her and play with her and I thought that his mom could encourage this but she was just as clueless.
Yesterday, we discussed at lunch time what we would be cooking for dinner the next three nights. I waited until 2pm for the MIL to take a shower and get dressed. Finally, I couldn't wait anymore and told Josh that I needed to go to the grocery store to get the stuff. I guess she told Josh how rude I was for not waiting. I am sorry, I designed baptism invites in the morning, got them in the mail, made lunch, washed 3 loads of laundry and cleaned up bottles, lunch, and breakfast and she had more than enough time to get ready.
Last night they inform DH that they need one of our cars to drive to Boston for 2 days. DH asked why they were going there and they said that they were going to meet the stepbrother and his family. Josh is just crushed because he only sees his mom once a year and he thought that the whole reason for her to visit was for her to see the kids. So, right now Josh is driving them to the T station for them to take the T to Boston and they will be back Friday night. He was supposed to leave at 8:30am and when I got home from dropping off Mya at camp he was still home. They weren't ready until 9am. He then told them that if they miss the T then they can sit there and wait for the next one. He is beyond pissed.
I just have never seen anyone so unhelpful when someone has a baby and so inconsiderate for people who just had a baby. They couldn't even help me carry in the groceries yesterday.
Re: Now I can vent.
I'm dumbfounded! I thought my IL's were less than helpful but this takes the cake!
I'm so sorry! Good riddance for them being gone.
It sounds like you're feeling well though, at least.
I am LIVID for you!! I'm so sorry they suck dear
big hugs!!
WOW... Just Wow...
How is it that they think its ok to come visit you right after you have a baby and expect you to still do everything? I just don't get people like that. If you are going to come stay at someones house right after they have a baby then you are there to help and give the poor mom a break! I'm so sorry you have had to put up with their crap!
How is Mya doing with the new sibling?
April, Mya is doing so much better since Amy Ro came. She has been reading Ava books and helping out whenever I ask her too. She is still nervous about giving her her pacifier, but it will get there. I think that she likes sitting in the backseat with her and being in charge. Thank you for asking.
[url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tte03a3.aspx[/img]
~Kimberly & Eric~ April 21, 2008 ~Tensing Pen ~ Negril, Jamaica ~ My Blog: One Sunset at a Time
That's so good to hear! Do you think the photoshoot helped make Mya feel special?
K+S 9.18.9 | DD #1 age 2 | PG # 5 EDD 9.17.12
Started TTC Nov. 2011
1st clomid cycle June 2012- No response :: HSG August 2012- Left tube blocked, right tube clear :: 2nd clomid cycle Aug. 2012 BFN :: 3rd clomid cycle Sept. 2012 :: BFP Sept 30th :: DS born 6/15/13 :: BFP #2 7/29/14 M/C 8/5/14 :: BFP#3 10/20/14 DD born 7/1/2015 :: Applied to be surrogate April '17 :: Transferred 1 Embryo for IFs Dec. '17 :: Surro Babe born 9/11/18 :: Started 2nd Journey May '19 :: Transferred 1 Embryo for new IFs 9/24/19 :: HB 138 at 6w6d
Ugh, they suck. Period. So sorry you had to deal with that!
Morgan, The photoshoot definitely helped. It helped her to feel important.
Wow, that is crazy, so sorry you have had to deal with that! Im glad Mya is adjusting well to the baby. Im sure as time goes by she'll really love being a big sister!
Katy and Brett ~ Runaway Bay, Jamaica ~ October 4, 2008
This exactly. I am really sorry