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Arcadia1114
member
Will Questions
Arcadia1114
member
DH and I just realized that we need to set up a will. Has anyone else done this? Where did you go/ How did you find someone to do it? Is it possible to do it online? We are planning on asking a friend of ours to be executive to our will and insurance and take custody of DS if the worst should happen. Also, my sister assumes that she will get DS and our insurance policy if something should happen to both of us. However, she is VERY immature and extremely bad with money. She is a great auntie but would not make a great mom. Should we tell her ahead of time that she is not the beneficiary? Lastly, any idea how much a will should cost to set up (not to be cheap but just to have a ballpark figure). TIA!
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Re: Will Questions
Yes we had a will set up when we got married. Fortunately for us, my dad and brother are estate planning attornies and that is what they do.
First of all you will need to designate 2 people that would take custody of DC in the event you both die. There is a #1 person and #2 person, in the event you both die and your #1 person is also dead. (sorry if that sounds morbid!)
If only one of you dies, your assets will go to the Spouse first. If you both die, you will need to decide if you want all your assets to go straight to the child (like when they are 18) or to a Trust, which will have a person, usually the person that gets custody, that has control over that money. Or you can pick another person to control the money but it really makes more sense to give the Guardian control. So you definitely want to pick someone that would not only be a good parent to your child but that handles money well.
You don't need to tell your sister anything. My sister thought the same thign and there's no way I would make her a Guardian. The only way she would ever know that she wasn't Guardian is if you and DH both die and at that point, do you really care?!
And the likelihood that both you and DH go at the same time is pretty remote.
I don't know what a regular attorney would cost you but I know you do a basic will on legalzoom.com. Ask around too....I'm sure family members or coworkers could give you a name. If its not too complicated, I don't think it would cost that much.
GL!
Yes. We did one before DD, and will update it as soon as her adoption is finalized.
We got a lawyer. The last time I did one, I had a legal plan through work, and found someone in the network. For the update, we found a lawyer who does adoptions and estate planning, so he'll be familiar with any issues that may arise.
I would not do it online. This is one time I would invest in a lawyer to "do it right". Some states recognize online wills, some don't. I wouldn't want to risk my will being null and void because I wasn't familiar with the law.
You can easily designate your friend to be executrix, and she will deal with the will according to your wishes. As far as insurance is concerned, all you need to do is designate her as a beneficiary with the insurance company. That doesn't require a lawyer.
I would be very surprised to be considered the beneficiary of any insurance policy. In our case, our beneficiaries are each other, and if both of us go, either our parents or our kids are beneficiaries.
You can tell your sister whenever you want that she's not going to be the executrix and she's not going to have custody of your DS. it's up to you when you want to have that conversation.
Will costs vary. Our basic one was around $350, but you may get quotes up to $1K or more. It depends on how complex it is, whether you're setting up trusts, where you live, etc.
GL
We have done 3 wills. 1 when we got married, and when we had DD, and again when LO was born.
You need an attorney. Luckily for us, my family has attorneys falling out of the sky, so we used a second cousin. We had a very hard time deciding who would raise our kids. DH's brother and SIL are great parents and probably my first choice, but they are VERY Catholic and DH refuses to let them raise his children.
I have two brothers, one of whom I wouldn't let babysit my cat. So we chose a cousin to raise them. We asked ahead of time, and also asked them to keep it to themselves because it really isn't anyone's business. They have a copy of all our paperwork and insurance policies.
You should talk to your sister. If something should happen, you don't want custody battles and people contesting the will. We also have a friend to be executor, benefactor, guardian of LO. We talked to our parents and siblings, so everyone knows what we want to happen to LO.
DH has a pre-paid legal service at work that is $20 per month, and we get a will free with the service.
We just got one done before DD was born (we had previously used LegalZoom.com before we had kids), and we went to an estate lawyer. He helped us prepare 6 documents for $500 total. Each of us had a will, medical power of attorney and power of attorney document. We had the words of our will written so that they would include any future children; that way, we won't have to update the wills as often.
We live in VA to give an idea of the price in our area.