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Need help convincing DH...

jnksmomjnksmom member
in Stay at Home Moms

DH's parents did very well financially and DH was used to buying anything he wanted. When we got married, we didn't make that kind of money(and still don't) but he still buys what he wants. The problem is we don't have the money and he just uses a credit card which DRIVES ME CRAZY! There have been 2 times we needed to fix a car(which cost $2000 both times) and had to use the credit card which is one thing. DH however, wants a new phone or computer or a treadmill and he charges it. I have tried talking to him about it and explaining to him that we should put money in savings until we have enough to pay for whatever he wants. If we didn't have credit card debt we would have the money to put in savings or even just the extra to do these things.

I am at a loss as to what else to do or how to get it through to him that if he continues to charge things we will NEVER get out of debt and also that we end up paying twice the price for stuff because of interest.  DH works with finances at his job...why doesn't he get this or just doesn't care???? Anyone have any ideas of what I can do?

The newest thing is he wants to go to Australia in December to visit his family(his dad is from Australia and all of his dad's family is still there). DH's brother is going and said he would pay for DH's airline ticket but DH wants me to go also.  I would love to go to Australia and to meet his family but I do not want to pay for my ticket with a CC. I refuse to do it. If he wants to go with BIL that is okay with me but he is against going without me. He said it will be okay, we will just put it on the credit card. UGH! NO we won't!!

Thanks for letting me vent and any suggestions would be great. Any other ways to make him stop using CC??

 

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Re: Need help convincing DH...

  • Dr.LorettaDr.Loretta member

    I would post this on the Money Matters board. The ladies there have great ideas on books to read or other resources so that you're both on the same financial page.

    GL

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  • ljones1025ljones1025
    You should let him listen to Dave Ramsey!
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  • justme04justme04 member

    Its deffinatly hard on people who are used to being able and spend money on anything they want when they need to go on a budget.  Look at how many pro athletes and rockstars and actors who are used to that huge paycheck and never know what to do once they don't have access to that kind of income....their spending habbits don't change....and thats how you see all those stories about former stars and athletes who go broke and have to sell everything they own.

    I would suggest posting on the Money Matters board on The Nest too.  Maybe they will have some good advice to help you curb your husband's spending.  Another option would be to call the credit card companies (if you have joint credit cards) and ask them to lower his limit....As long as he hasn't max'd out the card.  You can set up the same spending limits on his check card as well.

    You could also look into some financial literature or seminars?

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  • Kitten80Kitten80 member
    I feel your pain.  Once DH's credit cards were closed, he racked up $9000 on mine - and stopped paying the bill because he was using savings/checking to buy more crap.  And, my DH also works with money and does very well at it!  He will come home spouting how he found out they paid such-such bill late every month for the last year and that is $X in fees, and they got over draft for this and this, and they don't need this high a phone plan, and I caught a $4000 mistake.  However, at home he is guilty of all of the above.  Drives me up a wall.  If we lived MY way (like you, I only buy it if I have saved cash for it), we would have excellent credit, have paid off most or all of our student loans, etc.  He & We are now in counseling - this will destroy our marriage if he doesn't get his spending problem under control - you can't live like the independently wealthy if you are not.  End of story.  That probably doesn't help but at least you aren't alone - my suggestions, have a talk.  If it doesn't help look up the characteristics for spending problems & see if he meets the critieria.  Try going to counseling if you can or at least maybe he would listen to a financial advisor? GL!

     

     

     

     

     

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  • UltrazGSDUltrazGSD

    I would suggest finding a local (or line course) of Dave Ramsey's class Financial Peace University."  He also has a daily radio show, and several books.  He is amazing with finances, and big on getting husbands and wives on the same page financially.  Here's his website:

    https://www.daveramsey.com/

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