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Preemies
Frustrating comment from a mom no less...
I'm taking Sophie to kidde gym classes for the summer and I was chatting with one of the moms afterwards. I was telling her how Sophie was a preemie, and she asked me how early. I said 13 weeks, she says "oh thats not that early, is it?!" I kinda fired back and said YES it is, she was 3 months early, I was only 6 months pregnant and she spent 10 1/2 weeks in the NICU. Then she got a sympathetic look on her face and asked how long it was before I was able to hold her. When I said almost 2 weeks then she kinda got it. UGH. You would think a mom would realize gestational timelines!
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Re: Frustrating comment from a mom no less...
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Maybe she thought her comment would make you feel better. Sort of like when someone spills something on themselves and you tell them no one will notice. Or she is just ignorant.
Anyway, my heart goes out to you. I was not able to hold DD until she was 4 days old and it was extremely painful. I can't imagine having to wait two weeks. She looks like a big cutie now.
Brady Phoenix, 8.29.09
Claire Zoe, 10.26.10
Ugh, that is super annoying. I've gotten comments like that before, from one-upers, when I say our LOs were born at 32 wks they comment on how they know someone who had a LO at 22 wks! (I don't even get into whether that is actually possible considering viability...)
I think there are some people who just don't understand. and others who just always like to be right, regardless if they have any knowledge about a situation.
And I agree with pp, 2 weeks must have been so rough:( I had to wait 2 days with DD and it was so difficult, I can't even imagine.
Whenever someone asks how early DS was I always say 24 weeks and not "16 weeks early" just because most don't seem to get it unless you specify how far along you were.
We ALWAYS get one-upers as well. It is amazing that our son was born at 24 weeks and EVERYONE always seems to know a 22 weeker and I kind of roll my eyes on the inside. DH and I were just talking about that little girl from Florida who is the only known preemie with an approx GA that early. If there are supposedly all these 22 weekers walking around don't you think they would be in the news as well?
Best comment of all time: We were in the middle of buying a car when DS was born and when I got out of the hospital we had to stop by the dealership and sign some papers.
Salesman: I just want to let you guys know that I know exactly what you are going through. My son was born 5 weeks early and weighed ONLY 5.5 pounds.
Me (humoring him): Oh really? How long was he in the NICU?
Salesman: He didn't stay in the NICU, but he was really early.
::headdesk::
Jacob 3.23.08 * Grace 7.22.09 * Eli 7.26.11 * Annabelle 1.18.14
That reminds me of what my SIL said to me a couple of weeks after DD was born. She told me how her son, born full term, was only 6 pounds 7 onces, but is now over 6 feet tall.
Um, ok, soooooo not the same thing. And really, when you have a preemie in NICU, do you really care how tall they are going to be as adults? At that point, I just wanter her to be able to breathe properly.
Sometimes I wonder if moms of termies forget everything from their pregnancy.
yea, I've often thought that too!
all right, had to add my own comment/vent, since i've always known it would be catty of me to say something spiteful back to my girlfriend. she loves to bring up in every conversation (and has posted on all of her initial photos) how her daughter was "almost 2 weeks early!". 38 4/7, 8lb 4oz... that's called full-term. i've never said anything back because i know she's just naive, but it bugs me immensely. not to mention when she commented to me a few weeks ago that i'm "so lucky he was in the NICU... you didn't have to deal with people always wanting to come over and visit". really??
haha, ok, done ranting. thanks for letting me get that out
but it's true, a lot of people truly don't understand what "premature" means, or just don't think and don't realize how hurtful some comments are. it's not a competition. certainly not one that anyone desires to win.
Please, keep venting!
This is right up there with the people who tell us we're lucky to have kids in the NICU because it gives us more time to relax together or go out to dinner or get away for a weekend. And we get time to recover from c-sections without having to worry about taking care of babies. Yeah, because having a kid in the NICU isn't crazy stressful or anything and carrying around a freezer and a breast pump is super easy.
To the last person who said that to me I asked, "So, would you trade places with me then? And have my experience?" She admitted that she wouldn't ever want to trade places. We left it at that.