Mommyyyyyy!!!!

KristenBtobe · July 2010

We're having lots of "MOOOOMMMMYYYYY!!!" moments in our house lately. Maggie wants me to do EVERYTHING with her. She drags me around the the house by the hand, cries if Mike tries to take her for her bath, or diaper change, or if I leave the room. She doesn't do this all the time, but at least several times a day. I mistakenly thought we were past some of this separation anxiety stuff...blah.

Any tips for how to deal with it?

sistrkate · July 2010

I don't really think it's separation anxiety, I think it's anxiety about sharing you with her brother. We are still going through this with Justin, although he is more adjusted to having a sibling.

Justin never wants to sit in my lap, unless Tyler is sitting there. He wants to go in every room with me, he wants me to read him his books at night, and wants me to tuck him in.

My only comment is that it slowly gets better. We acknowledge Justin's feelings -- "Mommy/Daddy loves you so much" and make sure we spend some one-on-one time with each of them. I think he feels pushed out of the way at times and we just try to make him feel secure.

KristenBtobe · July 2010

Very good point. I'm working very hard to spend quality one on one time with her. I take her out on my own at least once a week and talk it up as special Mommy Maggie time, even if it's just to Target. Owen sleeps until 10 AM so we get up early and do things together.

It's just so painful to see her utterly melt down because I'm not doing exactly what she wants, and it's always at the most inconvenient times-at dinner she wants to sit in my lap, wants me to give her a bath when I'm feeding Owen, etc. She also tends to do it when I'm busy doing housework or on the computer.

warriormomerin · July 2010

sistrkate:
I don't really think it's separation anxiety, I think it's anxiety about sharing you with her brother. We are still going through this with Justin, although he is more adjusted to having a sibling.
Justin never wants to sit in my lap, unless Tyler is sitting there. He wants to go in every room with me, he wants me to read him his books at night, and wants me to tuck him in.
My only comment is that it slowly gets better. We acknowledge Justin's feelings -- "Mommy/Daddy loves you so much" and make sure we spend some one-on-one time with each of them. I think he feels pushed out of the way at times and we just try to make him feel secure.

Actually, the older they get the worse it gets. The minute Owen started realizing that he wanted things himself it went a little down hill. It's constant in my house. I've learned to always give them the same color/flavor/type of anything when possible. Luckily, DD is now old enough to get the concept of sharing, but she still has her moments.

Keep in mind that our case is probably more extreme since they're constantly fighting over one parent. I wish I could rip myself in half some days.

sistrkate · July 2010

I agree, the timing seems to be really inconvenient when these meltdowns occur. You're describing my days to a T. I think when you are busy is probably when it bothers her the most......Justin wants me to hold him while I'm cooking dinner, he bursts in the room when I'm putting Tyler down for a nap, etc. When we go out to eat, he wants to sit next to me and wants me to hold his hand to walk in and wants his father to take Tyler all the time. I guess it is really just a huge adjustment for them and quite honestly, I don't know a better way to manage it than to do what you are already doing.

adamsbabble · July 2010

I have no advice since we're constantly dealing with the same thing, but I just thought I would say that Ava loves Maggie's bathing suit in your siggy... so much so that she is insisting "No, that's Ava!" in the picture.

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