With my first pregnancy, several of my college friends found out right after we did because we were all together and I was not drinking. They know me well enough to know I would have at least one or two even if I was on medication etc so I had no excuses that they would believe. We waited until after the first appt to tell our parents and siblings and then over the next few weeks we told all the rest of our family and close friends when the opportunity presented itself.
This time, I don't know if I want to wait. We have our first appt on July 19. I originally wanted to wait until DSs birthday party on Aug 22 and have him open a "big brother" t-shirt as the last present. I love the idea in theory but I don't think I can wait that long. The big issue is that we are going to Myrtle Beach the first week of August with some friends (the same college group that knew first the first time around!) There is no way I can not drink for a whole week around them and them not figure it out. I would like to tell just our parents and siblings after the first appointment and wait until the birthday party to tell everyone else, but I don't think they could all keep their mouths shut for a whole month.
Part of me just wants to tell everyone now and be done with it!
What do you all think? When are you telling.
Re: When are you going to tell?
i told my mom the day i found out (she is my best friend and i cudnt keep it from her) and she told my dad. i also told my sister in-law the day i found out and she told my brother. but other than those 4, no one knows and we plan to keep it that way as long as we can. its driving me crazy not to tell everyone i see. our first appt is the 12th so i guess we will decide after that.
with DS i was young so keeping it a secret was easy since i wast ready for my parents to find out yet. but eventually they did and turns out they were super happy
We've told our parents/siblings (my parents on Father's Day, DH's last weekend), my BFF knows because she's trying to set a wedding date and was contemplating Feb/early Mar and I couldnt not tell somebody, one of DH's friends knows because he told him he was going to be a dad and DH had to tell him too. All of these people are sworn to secrecy until end of the first trimester though when we make it public.
I'm sure a couple more will find out along the way but I really want it to be DH and I doing the telling not our parents and I dont want to have to untell people god-forbid anything goes wrong so we are trying to keep it really limited.
It is really hard not to tell though, especially when I feel like crap and am declining invites to go out with friends where they would know if I wasnt drinking, etc.
HomemadebyHolman
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After early fetal echo at 13 weeks.
ETA: my mom, sister and H's dad knows.
We're driving from SF to LA this weekend to tell the family (both mine and his) And then I want to tell my BFs when we get back. But I'd like to keep it secret until at least the 2nd tri for other friends and general public. I really want to tell everyone, but should something (god forbid) go wrong, I know that I'll at least have the support of my closest friends and family to fall back on.
PG#1 - 3rd cycle BFP. Team Green. HELLP syndrome @ 34 weeks.
Later diagnosed with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, possible link to HELLP.
PG#2 M/C 3/14 - Surprise BFP 2/13. Beta's doubled every 52 hours from 3w5d-5w5d
Viable pregnancy scan at 5w5d; 2nd u/s showed 2 days of growth in 7 but a HB of 120
3rd u/s on 3/10/14 had no HB and baby had only grown 7 days over 14
D&C 3/17/14 - complications - DX Retroflexed uterus, multiple tears to cervix
All Welcome
Chart
Best friend - as soon as I found out
My parents - after first U/S (6 weeks)
His parents - after second U/S (8.5 weeks)
Everyone else - after next U/S (12.5 weeks)
I told my best friend right away b/c she knew we were dealing with IF treatments. We told our parents and dh's brother/his fiance right after first u/s with a heartbeat at 6 weeks. We have pregnant friends staying with us next week, so we'll likely tell them too. Plus, tonight a friend sent me a message on fb saying she had a dream we had a baby and asking if it means something! So, how can I not tell her now?