Do you ever feel like every pregnancy is going to end? — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Do you ever feel like every pregnancy is going to end?

I posted a little earlier about my two friends announcing their pregnancies. They are only 5 and 6 weeks pregnant, so they must have just found out in the past couple weeks. After the tears have past, I now am shocked at how early they told me they were pregnant. After dealing with a loss, I now feel like people are crazy to announce pregnancies so early, because they could lose the baby. It's hard to think postively about any pregnancy. Of course am not wishing anything on them and I know it's really none of my business about when they tell people they are pregnant. I am just nervous for them and of course insanely jealous. Does anybody else ever feel this way?

Re: Do you ever feel like every pregnancy is going to end?

  • I do! But I've always felt that way! The first pregnancy I ever encountered was my Mom's when i was 9, she lost the baby, and ever since I've expected all pregnancies to end.  Even when she was pregnant again with my sister, I didn't expect it to be successful, which it was.  With my pregnancy, all I could think about was "I can't believe I'm going to have my first baby, I can't believe I didn't lose my first baby, etc" But then I ended up losing her at 40 weeks.  So, now I REALLY feel like that.

    But, I do plan to tell people pretty early when I am pregnant again.  I want as many thoughts and prayers for my future pregnancies for as long as possible.  And I don't think I can imigane it being any worse to tell people I lost my baby at early stage, then it could be at the latest stage possible. 

    I pray for all pregnancies to stick, but unfortunately, I like you, and left with a bad taste in my mouth.  Sad

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    Dear God, I would have loved to have held my baby on my lap and tell her about you, but since I didn't get that chance, will you please hold her on your lap and tell her about me?


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    TTC since 2008

    6.27.2009 Clomid Cycle #3 100 mg

    BFP 7.27.2009 EDD = 4.1.2010

    Keely Gale was born sleeping 3.31.2010

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    TTC since 5.2010

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  • *am left with a bad taste in my mouth. (Sorry,I should have proof read before I replied)
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    Dear God, I would have loved to have held my baby on my lap and tell her about you, but since I didn't get that chance, will you please hold her on your lap and tell her about me?


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    TTC since 2008

    6.27.2009 Clomid Cycle #3 100 mg

    BFP 7.27.2009 EDD = 4.1.2010

    Keely Gale was born sleeping 3.31.2010

    Velementous cord

    TTC since 5.2010

    5 cycles of Clomid 100mg all = BFFFFFFFN

    Femara Cycle #1 2.5mg 2.3.2011 = BFN

    BFP # 2 5.23.2011 EDD 2.1.2012

    Stick baby stick!!

    Beta #1 13dpo 215 Beta #2 21dpo 8198

    Today I am pregnant and I love my baby
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  • BlakeGBlakeG
    Ninth Anniversary
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    I feel the same way.  The pg announcement that I mentioned in my other post, she was only 5 wks and they were telling us (and they know our whole story so they shouldn't be naive to m/c).  A few weeks have gone by and I am still so nervous for them and can't imagine telling anyone that early. 

    Just hope for the best for your friends.  Every night I say a little prayer that my friend's little bean grows strong and that they never have to go through what we are going through.  I keep telling myself to be positive, some days it works some days it doesn't. 

    Natural BFP - 2/13/10, Natural M/C - 3/9/10 (Missed m/c found at 8wks 4days) Prenatal B/W shows I'm a Beta Thal carrier & so is DH. Onto IVF w/PGD... Jan 2011 - IVF #1 - C/P Mar 2011 - IVF #2 - Day 5 PGD, no ET, 5 snow babies May 2011 - FET #1 - BFP!! Twins!!! 2/9/12 - Our precious miracles arrived! Baby A 7lbs 13oz & Baby B 5lbs 13oz
  • I had this exact conversation w/ DH the other day. I was feeling (really really ) envious of my sister who announced to the family a couple weeks ago. She was 8 weeks at the time and immediately my parents start talking about how they are going to be flying to see her in January when her baby arrives. I was shocked. I was telling DH "is that really what people think? that you can find out about a pg and then actually COUNT on the fact that there really will be a baby at the end -so much that you are already talking about plane tickets?!!" Then I realized, the answer is probably yes- that probably what people do think. I mean, at least people who have not experienced a loss. And who am I to rain on their parade but still...just salt in the jealous wound b/c I m/c 2 days after telling my whole family- so I never had the fun of having people talk about how they were going to get on a plane to visit me and MY baby in October. Just over before it even began.

    So yes, I do worry about this for my future pg but I HAVE to keep telling myself that it is worth the risk to try again. Fear is powerful but I can't let it take away my dream.

     

     

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  • Yes. Especially since I was sure that this pregnancy would stick.

     

    Also, the next time I'm pregnant, with the consent of my husband, I will tell people not as soon as the line shows up but soon after that.  Why so early?  Because I told most people (family/close friends) about both losses after they ended so I'd rather be able to FINALLY share good news even if it does end.   

     

  • I don't think I'll ever have a worry- free pregnancy. I don't think I'll be able to relax until I hold that baby in my arms. I've already told myself I won't decorate a nursery or buy anything for the baby until I'm at least 25 weeks. We had bought a few things in a yard sale after we found out and I can't stand the thought of the baby stuff in my house.

    I agree with PP though. I think I'll tell my family right away the next time. I didn't get the joy of telling anybody with this PG and I feel like I missed out. Next time I want to celebrate everyday of my pg, no matter how long it lasts.

    We'll never hold you in our arms, but we'll always hold you in our hearts.
    natural m/c 5-28-10 @ 6w
    Dx: MTHFR- compound hetero & Lupus Anticoagulant Syndrome

    BFP: 8/27/10 ~Sawyer Liam, our little miracle, born 4/17/11 @ 37 weeks 6 days.


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  • oh goodness, I do. BUT, in their defense. When I was pregnant with Evelyn at 6wks (I found out a week earlier so I had time to let it sink in) I told family and VERY close friends (who are like family). I couldn't keep the news inside.

    NEXT TIME (God, I hope there is a next time, and it's a healthy 9 months) I am not telling anyone IRL until I am showing and cannot hide it.

    Hi, I'm Amanda :)

    Remembering Evelyn and raising Bailey
    Evelyn Born at 24wks 6days on May 22, 2010 due to pre-e Passed away May 25, 2010

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  • image Ernie52408:

    I don't think I'll ever have a worry- free pregnancy. I don't think I'll be able to relax until I hold that baby in my arms. I've already told myself I won't decorate a nursery or buy anything for the baby until I'm at least 25 weeks. We had bought a few things in a yard sale after we found out and I can't stand the thought of the baby stuff in my house.

    I agree with PP though. I think I'll tell my family right away the next time. I didn't get the joy of telling anybody with this PG and I feel like I missed out. Next time I want to celebrate everyday of my pg, no matter how long it lasts.

    I agree with this.

    Hi, I'm Amanda :)

    Remembering Evelyn and raising Bailey
    Evelyn Born at 24wks 6days on May 22, 2010 due to pre-e Passed away May 25, 2010

    BFP# 2 Delivered 6wks early due to preeclampsia
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  • Yes ma'am.  My bff told me the next day (which I told her to). I'm terrified for that her pregnancy will end, but also that it will have a happy ending. I feel horrible for the second part, but it's part of my jealousy.
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  • I feel the same way. I also know that pregnancy will never be the same again for me.
    BFP#1-Signe Jo-born 9/6/08 BFP#2-natural MC on 2/13/10 BFP#3-CP on 6/7/10 BFP#4-Trygve James- born 7/30/11 BPF#5!!! EDD 4/13/13

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  • yes, i feel exactly that way.  and i hope i don't by the time i get pregnant again, but i'm not sure...
  • yes i feel the same way. i also feel sad at the fact that they can be so naive.
  • I do feel jealous, and very critical lately of people.  I had a friend on facebook complaining about feeling fat and wishing it was December already.  I really had to bite my toungue not to go off on her and tell her to be grateful for how lucky she is. 

    Believe me, I totally understand being nervous, and I think having a loss does make you more aware of bad things that can happen, but I have gotten to 17, 33, and then 29 weeks.  In my case, I don't think there is a "safe" point to get to.  I think once the doctor places a breathing, healthy baby in my arms is when I'll be over being nervous.  How you feel is completely normal.

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  • I do, esp. after having 3 m/c.  I feel like every preg. is going to end and then when I see people I know going on to have totally normal pregnancies, I feel a little jealous.  Not healthy, I know.  I don't want anyone to m/c, including ME!
    ***SAIFW***
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    M/C at 8 weeks (blighted ovum) May 2010

    3 IUIs with Gonal-f, Sept, Oct, November 2010 = BFN
    IVF#1 1/2011 - 32 eggs retrieved, 26 fertilized, 2 trans. = BFN
    Time to regroup and heal and FET at some point
  • I've had early losses and no one really knew when I was pregnant. With both of my living children I told people when I was around 5 weeks. I was ok with them knowing about the pregnancy. My thinking was that  if I lost the baby I would have support or at the very least people would know why I was so upset. I would rather have to tell people about a miscarriage that feel alone again. I've now become superstitious. The two pregnancies that ended with healthy babies were the ones where I told people and bought stuff really early.
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  • On FB, a high school classmate announced she was pregnant at like 4 or 5 weeks.  I wanted to give her a reality check but didn't want to come off as bitter.  She hasn't even had her first appointment!  I just don't get it.  I will be hiding her status updates soon. 

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    We love and miss you Jillian (18w) and Peanut (6w). Welcome to our TAC miracle Jacob!
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