Feeding issues — The Bump
Special Needs

Feeding issues

DS is super skinny, 0% for weight and 75% for height.  He has been Failure to thrive and now is "malnourished" (Low iron, low protein, eats no veggies, only bananas for fruit).  I try to feed him, but most of the time he just closes his mouth, shakes his head "no" and won't eat.  My DD also has feeding issues and at 4, takes at least one meal a day as a "smoothie" with peanut butter, peas, and a fruit.  The other meals she eats don't have near the calories.  She is finally not failure to thrive, but I am starting to feel like I am doing something wrong.  I try to feed them good healthy food.  Beans, meat, veggies, fruit.  I have been to nutritionist for DD and they didn't think I was doing anything wrong (had a pretty complete food diary with all of the visits.)  They are just insanely picky. 

My DS won't even eat McDonalds.  

Anyone else have a kid like this?  I know he can eat because occasionally he will eat a slice of pizza, a hot dog, or a piece of sausage.  He will sometimes eat regular people oatmeal.  He will eat as many goldfish or cheerios as I will let him (none right now, since he isn't eating), but they have little nutritional value.  I am getting worn down by trying to cook things and come up with meals.  I am making 9 meals a day (3 for him, 3 for DD, and then for DH and I) and still he is not eating any of the things I offer that have nutrition.

I want to enjoy my kids,  I want them to be happy, but I put him in his high chair or next to me on the sofa and try to feed him and he just shakes his head, clamps his lips shut, and waits for his milk (the doctor told me to cut back on milk to 16 oz, which I have done).  He cries until he gets his sip cup, with milk.  

Anyone have any tips or experience they can share?  I am just super frustrated at this point.   

 

Re: Feeding issues

  • Have you had a feeding evaluation by an occupational therapist or speech language pathologist?  

    When he does eat, how are bowel movements?

    Did he have reflux when little?

    Could eating either be causing pain/discomfort or is this a behavior in response to pain/discomfort that used to occur?  

    What does the pedi say? I would keep having this checked out until you get some more answers than what it seemed the nutritionist apparently said.  Kids don't really just become malnourished without an explanation. 

    I can't recall or don't know his history though - was he born prematurely? Any explanation for the failure to thrive?  Is he on track developmentally?

    GL.  I can imagine this is really tough. 

  • image susanmosley:

    Have you had a feeding evaluation by an occupational therapist or speech language pathologist?  

    When he does eat, how are bowel movements?

    Did he have reflux when little?

    Could eating either be causing pain/discomfort or is this a behavior in response to pain/discomfort that used to occur?  

    What does the pedi say? I would keep having this checked out until you get some more answers than what it seemed the nutritionist apparently said.  Kids don't really just become malnourished without an explanation. 

    I can't recall or don't know his history though - was he born prematurely? Any explanation for the failure to thrive?  Is he on track developmentally?

    GL.  I can imagine this is really tough. 

    I know how you feel.  I think you have responded to my posts about DS#2 lack of weight gain. I was going to suggest an evaluation also. Kayson was having a gag issue also so we went and got him evaluated after a few visits this issue cleared up.

     

    What does the pediatrician say?

     

  • Loading the player...
  • We go to GI next week.  He used to eat better from about 7-10 months.  I could just put food on the tray and he would eat it and be fine (it was a nice change from DD, so relaxing).  He didn't seem to have any reflux or other issues.  I know I just have to go through the motions, see the doctors and figure it out.  It just takes so much time and it is frustrating to feel like you can't do the right thing.
  • My son who is 2.5 has not been on the growth chart for weight since about 6 months old, he currently weighs 25 pounds ( with clothes on) and is in the 3rd percentile ( finally, sad that I am "happy" with that). I count his calories and he takes between 1,000 and 1,300 a day but that is with a lot of work on my part ( adding heavy cream to his chocolate milk, butter to everything, etc.) and a lot of coaxing and bribing. He is very picky ( eats pasta, chicken nuggets, corn, banana's, yogurt, waffles, french toast, cheese, chicken cutlets, rice, crackers, popcorn...that is about it) and loves milk. Noah also gets very very constipated monthly. I get what you mean about just wanting to enjoy your kids....it sucks and if you haven't been there you have no idea. I am constantly worried about what did or didn't make it in his mouth!!!!
  • Provided the GI doesn't find anything physical, feeding therapy can help.

     One of the techniques we use is to "bribe" him with a toy.

    he gets a toy (something small but fun/noisy) for 30 seconds

    then "time to take 1 bite" (take the toy away)

    you say" toy is waiting, time to take 1 bite"

     if he refuses, turn your head away, do your best to show no emotion at all, do not interact with him at all for 15 seconds. then do it again, "toy is waiting, time to take 1 bite" 

    even if it is a small tiny bite, he got it in, and is learning the techinique.

    give him the toy for 30 seconds, then "time for 2 bites"

    continue until he seems to be full/ finished. but make him responsible, "time for last bite, then you put the top on the jar"

    we got to the point where we barely needed the toy at the start of the meal to get him going. 

    If I didn't explain it well let me know 

     

    Katherine Proud Mommy and Foster Mommy
  • In response to KathW - I would not try that technique at home with you (mom) as the therapist!!  No way.  Sure there is a behavioral approach to some feeding therapies (and I think your child could likely benefit from feeding therapy - behavioral? not sure.) but I wouldn't initiate it without the skilled and direct teaching from a professional - and a good idea of why your child is having feeing difficulties.  I don't think a power struggle needs to be added into this situation.  What you describe, OP isn't going to be nipped in the bud by following the (many times valuable) technique above.  I am betting you know this already.  I wasn't going to share my opinions on this, but I have a hard time keeping to myself.  Sorry if I am coming off know-it-all-ish.  I definitely don't know it all nor have a good explanation or treatment option for your son.  GL, OP.  Tough tough situation.  Update after the GI appt.
  •  and a good idea of why your child is having feeing difficulties.  I don't think a power struggle needs to be added into this situation.  

     I don't think anything I said in my response is an indication of why my child has feeding difficulties. If anything the technique I described takes away the power struggle. It simply is time to eat. 

     OP asked if anybody had been in the same place or had ideas. I told her what worked for us.  

    Katherine Proud Mommy and Foster Mommy
  • image KathW:

     and a good idea of why your child is having feeing difficulties.  I don't think a power struggle needs to be added into this situation.  

     I don't think anything I said in my response is an indication of why my child has feeding difficulties. If anything the technique I described takes away the power struggle. It simply is time to eat. 

     OP asked if anybody had been in the same place or had ideas. I told her what worked for us.  

    No no, KathW, I didn't mean YOU were having a power struggle.  You are obviously using a technique that is successful with your child.  I think it is great and totally respect that.  I just think that in the situation the OP describes, it wouldn't be the best for her to try to tackle this herself with a behavioral approach until she gets more answers and explanations and input from people trained to address such issues.

    I am really honestly sorry I was misunderstood and sounded like I was bashing you or your techniques.  100% not my purpose.  I hope you can see that and believe me.  My apologies. 

    ETA: oy. I just reread - my wording was horrible.  I was referring to your post (kathW), but all of the "you"s were directed at the OP.  Yikes.  Sorry again.   

  • Its ok :) It is hard sometimes to say things how you intend on a message board.

     

    Katherine Proud Mommy and Foster Mommy
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards