Okay. I don't really know how to put all of this into words. I'm so frazzled right now and I'm running on absolute empty.
Hubs and I have been fighting, fighting, fighting. It's gotten to be so unbearable. I have no idea if we can really make it through this. We had problems before our MC, but after talking to him last night...I think it's apparent that it might be a contributing factor.
We don't really discuss it anymore, just because I've moved on for the most part...okay maybe not. But to me, it does no good talking about it with him because he just doesn't understand. Anyway, last night he brought up some things that have been stressing him out/bothering him and the MC was one of them. He went on about how he wanted that baby and he's sad too and all of that. It's all very frustrating to me. I honestly sometimes wish it had never happened. That I had never gotten a BFP or that I never told him. There's nothing I can do to fix the situation and obviously getting PG again is just not in the cards for us. Babies don't fix marriages, as much as I'd like to believe they do.
I just feel like nothing is helping and nothing is going to but perhaps time? It's been over 3 months now and like I said, I feel I've adapted pretty well but I wish I could just wake up and it would have never happened. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind kinda stuff.
Re: I think this MC has wrecked my life...
The fact your husband wants to talk about it is really good! You may wnat to shut it out of your mind and pretend it never happened, but that's not fair to him. He has emotions he wants to express and you need to be there for him.
This did not just happen to you.
First of all a miscarriage is a trauma....its a loss..it is definitely something that can put a toll on a marriage. My DH thinks its time to "be over it". Nobody can understand unless they suffered the loss.
I am not sure of the specifics of what your issues were prior to your BFP and your m/c.
However, IMO, a marriage is worth working for & saving. IF you love each other and you want to make it work maybe you guys should try couples counseling.
Prior to getting married I said to my husband that I wanted to try EVERYTHING to save our marriage should we have trouble. It sounds like the two of you love one another enough to fight for it. would you try the counseling.
Thanks ladies. We've done all of the above. Marital counseling, individual counseling, etc. Some things occurred and the Army had to step in and basically requested we no longer do marital counseling until the individual stuff was taken care of. He's in anger management group therapy (well, soon to be) and some individual counseling. I've been in counseling since I moved out here in February. It's just exhausting and I'm starting to feel like this PG/MC was the last thing I needed. We had issues before all of this happened and the MC only exacerbated them.