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Babies: 6 - 9 Months
Cheekie4
member
How do you deal w/ the "drama" friend?
Cheekie4
member
I have this friend who exaggerates everything from things w/ her son, her current pregnancy, herself, family, other friends, church, work, etc. She's the type of person who has to one-up you on all situations. She sorta stresses me out.
We used to go on walk together every night, but it got to be too much. I told her that I wanted to walk to workout (she can only go for like 10 mins), so I got out of that one. Then she started calling multiple times of the day. I don't want to talk on the phone all day, so I told her to email or text. I had 7 FB messages from her today. And for the past 3 nights, she'd invited herself (w/ her DS) down to our home after DD is in bed (she's said, "I saw your lights on, so I knew you would want me over!"). This is the time of night that DH & I get alone time. Instead of enjoying our time together, we're watching her kid while she complains. I know he's just a baby, but I'm getting tired of watching someone else's kid & him waking up DD.
To be honest, I just don't want to be around her anymore. I hate feeling that way. I'm not that kind of friend.
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Re: How do you deal w/ the "drama" friend?
eep that really sucks.. sounds like you need a friend divorce
i usually just avoid people like that until they go away.. but it sounds like she might need you to be more forceful
Me: 37
DH: 36
Married: 08-25-07
DS: 11-20-09
Name change alert: Formerly Lisswastaken
I know! I just don't know how to do it nicely? I'm not good w/ snark. It just comes out all mean & crazy like. I don't want to officially writer her off; I just don't want to be her (& I swear she says this "BFF for ever & ever").
THANK YOU!!!
No problem. I've delt with this before and if you don't see/talk to each other as much you pretty much skip the drama and get down to the important stuff when you actually do get to see each other.
It's not the best way to do it, but maybe you should message her how you feel. Ask her not to come over every night, leave that many messages, etc. If you still want to be friends, tell her that, but say something like we need breathing space. If you're really want to be open, tell her you hate hearing about her drama 24/7.
Proud Mama to Mickey (12.03.09) and Nemo (06.06.13)
Don't reply to every message. Don't answer the door when you guys are ready for alone time, front porch light off, etc.
Send her a link for a mommy meet-up group. Sounds like she needs more interaction with others.
Good luck! I suck at stuff like this.
This might not work because she lives so nearby but I had to do this with a friend of mine... not nec bc she was full of drama but bc she would not leave me alone!! She had a baby a couple months before me and bc of that, she wanted to become BFF all of a sudden when, in the past, we would have gone months w/out speaking. So it all pissed me off.
Anyway, I tried not responding to emails, not returning phone calls but then she got all defensive and asked if she did something wrong. And while she was bugging the crap out of me, she didn't really do anything wrong and I didn't want her to feel bad. Then she emailed me the day I started back to work (she's a SAHM which I fully admit to being angry jealous about) asking why I hadn't returned a phone call and I had enough! So I sent her an email and kept it short and to the point and basically told her that my life is now my baby's and that because I have to work, I like to spend as much "free" time I have with my baby and my family and am not interested in play dates and whatnot right now. Basically I put it all on me.
She's since backed the F up but we're still FB friends and still email on rare occasion.
click the pic (blog)