Crappy friends

butterfly843 · June 2010

I am still so mad at some friends we went to dinner with last night. Before I say what happened I will give some background. A week after our loss the guy asked us to loan them 5,000 and wouldn't sign any kind of note to prove we loaned to them, so dh told him no to the loan. They stopped talking to us for about a month. The guy is a gambler and gambles all his money away which was one of the reasons we didn't want to loan them money we knew we would never see back.

So last night we go out to dinner and a movie with them. They are getting married in august and dh is the best man. Dh jokes he doesn't know what to get them for their wedding and the girl says $3,000 since you are best man that is what you have to give us (she was serious not joking). My dh just ignored it and talked about something else. Then the guy tells my dh he wants him to pay for a weekend in Atlantic City for the bachelor party. I told him all the groomsmen are suppose to chip in, my dh isn't paying for everything. Dh tells him maybe you should find someone else to be best man. The guy pretends he doesn't hear my dh and changes the conversation.

Then we are waiting in line at the movie to get tickets and the girl see's my dh's new tattoo on his leg (he got a blue and red star to remember our twins, the tattoos are pretty big, but mean a lot to both of us) she points to it and says what is that, my dh says my new tattoo, she asked what's the meaning behind that (in a nasty voice) and he tells her for the twins, my dh didn't see this disgusted look she had and proceeds to show her my tattoo on my back and in the middle of the line she yells out who the hell are Zachary and Madison. He said our twins we lost, she gives the disgusted look again. I was so pissed and ready to go home. Dh told me don't let it get to me and we watched the movie. I said nothing to her after the movie and I am still so mad about it. I am hoping they can't attend our 4th of july bbq. I think somehow my sister sensed I was mad about something because she texted me she loved me shortly after the movie ended and I didn't even tell her what happened till I got home. Sorry this is long.

dondraandluis · June 2010

Sounds like you guys need to lose these so called "friends." Sorry they are so crappy and acted that way!

Scout05 · June 2010

What a total b!tch. I think you should uninvite them, and your DH should find a better use for that weekend than to be in their wedding.

:::hugs:::

butterfly843 · June 2010

They haven't been to our new house yet, maybe I could give them the wrong address and they won't be able to find it. I am trying to talk dh out of being the best man. They haven't even gone for tuxes or anything yet so it's not like anything is ordered yet for him.

Scout05 · June 2010

butterfly843:
They haven't been to our new house yet, maybe I could give them the wrong address and they won't be able to find it. I am trying to talk dh out of being the best man. They haven't even gone for tuxes or anything yet so it's not like anything is ordered yet for him.

Seriously, I would bow out.

Yes, you will lose them as friends. It doesn't seem like this would be much of a loss.

Court1 · June 2010

Yes, ditch them. They're not really your friends.

vflipo · June 2010

ambrandau2:
butterfly843:
They haven't been to our new house yet, maybe I could give them the wrong address and they won't be able to find it. I am trying to talk dh out of being the best man. They haven't even gone for tuxes or anything yet so it's not like anything is ordered yet for him.

Seriously, I would bow out.

Yes, you will lose them as friends. It doesn't seem like this would be much of a loss.

I agree completely.

ashleyy0219 · June 2010

wow those don't sound like friends at all.

It seems like they are only happy when everything revolves around them.

(((big hugs)))

btw I love the idea of the tattoo, I was trying to think of something to do to remember my LO but I haven't decided on a design yet.

butterfly843 · June 2010

Thanks girls, dh made me think I was crazy to be so mad over this. Glad to hear I am not alone in thinking it's ridiculous. It's so sad after a loss to see people act that you thought were friends. I think she is still mad I didn't attend her bridal shower, because I couldn't handle seeing all the pregnant women there. She did get a gift I just didn't attend.

CarrieLeigh84 · June 2010

Uhhh, how did you not punch this broad in the face?

Anyone who trivializes your loss, and puts you in these kinds of positions are NOT your friends.

If my best friend asked me to give her $3000 for a wedding present, I'm pretty sure I'd laugh in her face. Friends just dont DO that.

KristysRedBarn · June 2010

I'm sorry. They don't sound like very good friends.

butterfly843 · June 2010

I don't know how I held back from hitting her. Especially since my hormones are crazy right now with my ivf meds. We have a few weddings this summer and I am thinking about lying and saying I messed up the date of my cousins wedding and can't attend their wedding.

Ashley858 · June 2010

UGH. What a _bitch!! I would have slapped her for the nasty looks. Friends suck sometimes. ((((Hugs))))

Shemico · June 2010

*hugs* I'm sorry hun. These two don't sound like the kind of friends you want to keep around.

Mocha Girl · June 2010

Wow, some people just amaze me! I agree with everyone else... You need to ditch those losers. They don't sound like "friends" to me.

ShellShockedMama · June 2010

Please divorce these "Friends".

NOW

3ltlones · June 2010

I"m sorry, they don't seem like they are worth the worry. She seems like a major biitch. I'm really sorry she and he treated you that way, you definitely deserve better friends.

butterfly843 · June 2010

Dh and I just had a talk about it. He is suppose to talk to the guy about wedding plans someday this week. Dh said when they get together he is going to tell him to find another best man and that we won't be attending the wedding. I love this board it is great to have all of your support.

schen0510 · June 2010

Wow...what is wrong with people. I would totally tell them you are canceling your party but have it anyway. It sounds like your DH is fed up with them as well...is there anyway you guys can completely separate yourselves from them?

butterfly843 · June 2010

schen0510:
Wow...what is wrong with people. I would totally tell them you are canceling your party but have it anyway. It sounds like your DH is fed up with them as well...is there anyway you guys can completely separate yourselves from them?

I am completely done with them, I was mad at them last year when they didn't say anything to us about our loss and then stop talking to us because we wouldn't loan them money. Hoping dh will be done with them this week after he talks to the guy. We had some family and close friends over tonight and we asked a couple of them what they thought about the situation and I think dh started to see why I was so angry. It's hard because he didn't see the face she made, but the comments he did hear.

pepomntpat · June 2010

dondraandluis:
Sounds like you guys need to lose these so called "friends." Sorry they are so crappy and acted that way!

Me too.

suntoto · June 2010

CarrieLeigh84:
Uhhh, how did you not punch this broad in the face?
Anyone who trivializes your loss, and puts you in these kinds of positions are NOT your friends.
If my best friend asked me to give her $3000 for a wedding present, I'm pretty sure I'd laugh in her face. Friends just dont DO that.

This. Both of them sound like selfish a$$holes. I am sorry that they put you through so much heartache.

DoingItRight · June 2010

I wouldn't be spending anymore time with them.

tashaobrien · June 2010

wait a minute...did you say these ppl are friends? Don't sound like friends to me. You'd think they would be a bit more sensitive to your loss. I'd slowly start pulling away. All of a sudden I'd be too busy to hangout or have prior committments. But, that's just me.

PS Sorry for your loss

writergirl5786 · June 2010

yeah those are definitely not real great friends. ((hugs)) so sorry you had to go through that! i would've throat punched her.

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