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Friend lost baby today at 27 weeks :(

sabrina69barnessabrina69barnes member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

 A friend of mine went to her appt today at 27 weeks. Apprently her baby doesn't have a heartbeat, amniotic fluid, and his skull is flat. She is being induced right now. I'm am so heartbroken for this family. They have a 10 year old but were told she couldn't have anymore so this was their micacle baby.

 I went and saw her today and on my way picked up a kit so a nurse could do the babys hand and foot prints since the hospital doesn't. I also asked if they wanted me to run by their house to get a camera, special blanket, or extra clothes or anything. Her MIL was there anyway so the just asked her to get it but they thanked me because they said they wouldn't have thought about it. She is wanting visitors so I'll go see her tomorrow. My Dh works with her DH so her is going to tell their coworkers so that her DH doesn't have to. (We asked if this was something they wanted.)

  I've had several misscarriages but they were all early. Her baby had a name and everything was all ready for him. I can't imagine what they are going through. Is there anything I should do for them that I'm not thinking of? Please keep this family in yout T&P.

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Re: Friend lost baby today at 27 weeks :(

  • ChicwedChicwed member
    wow, i my heart goes out to your friend and her family.  please direct her to this board when she is ready.  we have a great support system to help her get through this horrible horrible time.
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  • jerriesgirljerriesgirl

    I am so sorry for your friend's loss and for your losses.  I think everything you have done are great.  Continue to support her after she leaves the hospital whether is just be talking to her, bringing meals, taking clothes to the dry cleaners or just watching mindless tv with her.  Remember her LO and celebrate the 27 weeks they had together when she is comfortable to do so (especially around her EDD).

    You are a great friend! 

    My Blog
    We love and miss you Jillian (18w) and Peanut (6w). Welcome to our TAC miracle Jacob!
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  • Sunflower730Sunflower730 member

    I am so sorry for your friends loss. Like the OP said direct here here as we are a great support system.

     

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  • CashewsMommyCashewsMommy member

    You've done more than enough already!!! Please tell her, if they want to hold their baby, to spend as much time as the need! I didn't spend a lot of time with Aurora.. maybe only 30 minutes. I didn't play with her fingers or examine every inch of her. I wish i did.

    Also have her ask the hospital about Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep. They'll come in and take professional photos.

    Be there for her after, say the babys name, and ask how she is doing. Not just today, but weeks... months from now. Because that'll be the time that she'll think that nobody remembers.


    BFP#1 {Cashew} - 9.19.09 EDD 5.26.10
    The day you first lay in my arms, you made my life complete.
    Aurora Rose born sleeping at 35w on 4-21-10
     BFP#2 {Almond} - 2.1.11 EDD 10.12.11 C/P 2.11.11

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  • a&b=him&mea&b=him&me member

    OMG, my prayers go out to your friend and her family.

    What you offered to do is wonderful(the kit for the hand and foot prints). I would suggest bringing over a meal, or helping with any of the errands they are going to need done.

    Im so sorry :(

    Hi, I'm Amanda :)

    Remembering Evelyn and raising Bailey
    Evelyn Born at 24wks 6days on May 22, 2010 due to pre-e Passed away May 25, 2010

    BFP# 2 Delivered 6wks early due to preeclampsia
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
    Photobucket

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  • MySweetBabooMySweetBaboo member
    I am so very sorry for your friend.  My heart breaks for her.  It just isn't fair.  I am so sorry.
    My Little
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  • tlcW0714tlcW0714
    imageCashewsMommy:

    You've done more than enough already!!! Please tell her, if they want to hold their baby, to spend as much time as the need! I didn't spend a lot of time with Aurora.. maybe only 30 minutes. I didn't play with her fingers or examine every inch of her. I wish i did.

    This! Exactly!!  She may not realize right now how important it will be to her later that she spent as much time with the baby as possible.  I didn't spend a lot of time with Keely either, and I didn't look at all of her...try to recommend to her to do this.  But if she dosn't, its okay, she will do what she can in those moments.  You are a great friend!!  My T&P's are with all of you!

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  • mommy411mommy411 member
    Oh my heart breaks for families that have to endure this pain...My T&P are with them.
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
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  • sabrina69barnessabrina69barnes member
    Thanks guys for all your support. I just talked to her a she is home now. Nikola was born around 9:30pm and they let her leave at 1am since there were no complications. That sounded early to me but its the same doctor that I had with DS who would have let me leave 24hrs after a c-section. She said he looked like his brother. She had to cut our call short because she got a call from the funeral home. I called her husband a little while ago and said I was making and bringing over their dinner sometime between 4 and 5 and to call if they would prefer something diffrent. I'm making lasagna since it re heats well. I'll bring over paper plates and stuff so they don't have dishes. My DH is stopping by on his way to work to drop of the flowers that I had intended to take to the hospital today. She was doing the nursery in rocking horses so I ordered a rocking horse charm with Junes birthston in it to give her later. I also wrote Nikola's birthday on the calendar and reminders to call her as well. That is probably something I wouldn't have thought of. There were a lot of small registry type items that she hadn't got yet so I got a baby boy photo album since she had several ultrasounds and took lots of pictures yesterday.
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  • prplprincess05prplprincess05 member

    If she needs someone to talk to in the end I can relate 100% 2 weeks ago we lost our son at 23 weeks firemanwife2005@aol.com i will pray for them.

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