Feelings on this? WWYD

kayteatrudeau · June 2010

DH came home from work and told me that instead of being nervous for Thursday I should be excited to be induced.

Apparently he wants to enjoy (yes, he said enjoy) Thursday with me.

Either I'm missing something or he's missing something. But he thinks I should get an epi the minute I get the IV for petocin and be ok with that. I'm totally not on the same page. Or should I go for it? And I being foolish?

I suppose my question for second time mommies would be is there any benefit to roughing it through contractions until active labor or is DH right? Is it unecessary pain? Should I just keep myself out of pain from the start?

I'm ok with getting the epi done now as I know the procedure. I'm ok with a c-section if it's needed as my friends describe it as no big deal. But extreme pain managment right from the start? Isn't there a time limit with an epi?

jturn · June 2010

I'm not sure they'll let you get an epi right away...I think you have to get to at least 4cm or something. I was induced the first time and it didn't work right away but I'm not sure they would have known if I had an epidural right off the bat. They figured out it wasn't working because I wasn't haven't any painful contractions. Also I remember once I asked for it they tried a few other things first.

LCB34 · June 2010

At my hospital you can't get an epi until you are at least 3-4 centimeters dilated.

So, your DHs plan may not even be an option.

mcadams1 · June 2010

I think its totally fair to say you'll wait and see how you feel when you're actually experiencing the pain. Nobody can tell you what's right for you. I ended up getting an epi fairly early because I was last on a long list and they would have to wait 40min to call the anesthesiologist back in once he got done if I changed my mind. Plus it was 11pm and I wanted to get some rest. I would have made a different choice had some of those things been different. You don't know how things will go or how you'll feel so I wouldn't get too worked up over possibilities. Just tell him you need his support with whatever you decide and even if he thinks you should get an epi immediately, there are some pregnancy things that aren't about being a team and this choice is yours to make.

anvloveskme · June 2010

My hospital will only give them after you have dilated to 4 cm, and you may not be able to get one if you are 8 cm or beyond.

xDanniellex · June 2010

According to the baby shows and childbirth class you can't get an epi till at least 3cm, maybe 4. Epis are also known to slow labor, so waiting would be best.

I understand wanting to be pain free, as I sit here with my 5 min apart contractions, but I wouldn't want to prolong things.

joeandmarsha · June 2010

I don't think that they will give it to you right away. Besides the begining stages of labor aren't that bad.

snowbride011004 · June 2010

They won't let you get an epi untill you're well on your way- it can stall labor. Also, just because you get an epi doesn't mean you don't feel anything... there's still discomfort and can be pretty strong.

You'll enjoy it once it's over... once that baby is OUT and on your chest.

June2007 · June 2010

I think its ok to feel whatever you feel, you cant control your feelings sometimes! I would be both nervous and excited. I would just take the day as it comes, dont try to plan when you'll get the epi or every single detail, just know its an option and is there when you need it. Like pp said they wont let you have (most likely) until you're at a certain dilation anyway.

haleybeth81 · June 2010

I would try the contractions and see how you do. I had my water break andback labor and was able to wait until 5 cm with just the stadol (I'm a huge pain whimp). I did get the epi before they started the pit ( my contractions were on top of each other and not really working) but that was because I could barely handle the regular contractions at that point. It literallly takes like 5 min for them to put the epi in and the stadol does help with the early labor pains really well. Just see how it goes is my advice.

moonrose2715 · June 2010

Personally, if it were my DH telling me what I should do and feel regarding this process, I would let him know that the next time he is about to push a bowling ball out of his vagina, he can have an opinion.

Sorry but it irritates the crap out of me when someone other than whose body it is thinks they get to have an opinion on how you should handle this situation. No one else knows what it is like to live in your body through this experience. At this point, you don't even know.

So with that said, you should do what feels right. If you want to wait and see, well then, that is exactly what you should do. Maybe you could go naturally (minus the pitocin of course) and "enjoy" the experience. Stranger things have happened! You might get in there and be begging for something right away. Your hospital may have policies (as mentioned above). Ultimately though- your body, your birthing process, your decision.

And as far as being "excited" and ready to "enjoy" this process... please see paragraph one. Not that you should go in mentally prepared to suffer, but if you're nervous, well, don't you think that is totally natural and normal!?! This is a big effing deal! If you aren't a little nervous for your first time, I think that maybe you have no idea what you are getting yourself into. It is natural and all of that and yes millions of women have done it forever, but that doesn't change that it is a big deal. It is a physical trauma even in the best of circumstances. There is a reason women have died in childbirth (thank goodness signifcantly less now because of modern medicine).

So sorry DH, but I think it is time to keep your thoughts to yourself and start supporting whatever it is you want and need.

Mrs.Rose · June 2010

I think he is just trying to get you excited and he probably doesn't "get" how nervous you might be. Just tell him you plan to go with the flow of things. Honestly, that is all you can do. I went for about 30 hours during my induction without an epi before I finally got one. The early stages were manageable and its not like I was screaming in pain or anything. DH and I watched a movie and hung out.

MontrealWing · June 2010

It all depends upon you but I was induced with #1 (I was not dilated at all) and I got the epi when I hit 1cm and was as happy as could be. I dislike pain so I figured that there was no sense of me having to feel any. I am living in another state for this delivery and already made sure that my doctor would okay my epi when I wanted it again, even at 1cm. Good luck.

trickywoo · June 2010

With an induction, I know my hospital assumes you'll have the epi right away.

I think it's worth waiting as long as you can - especially if this is your first delivery - because the epi can slow labor down. Also, sometimes because of the epi they need to up the pitocin dose, and if that doesn't do the trick, you're off to the c-section.

I was induced and passed on the epi. Early labor felt just as it does without the pitocin and was tolerable. You can still chat and watch TV and have a nice time with your hubby. If you think you want an epi, see if you can hang on to 4 cm or so, because that's sort of the prime time slot to get one. Good luck!

katie277s · June 2010

I wasn't allowed to get my epi until I hit 3cm.

momof2buggs · June 2010

I noticed you asked about toughing it out until "active labor" and I wanted to tell you that with Pitocin, you're pretty much in active labor right from the start. I'm not trying to scare you by any means, I just don't think anyone who has never had a pitocin induced labor understands this. I don't know what your hospital's policy is as far as epi's, but as a mom who has had 2 Pitocin induced labors, I advise you to get your epi ASAP! My last labor started on its own at home, and my contractions were so far apart, and so NOT intense that I doubted that I was in real labor, until 5 pm, and he DS was born 2 hours later. I did not get any pain medication because by the time I got to the hospital, I was dilated to 9 cm and almost ready to push. They would not give me anything, even though I told them I was going to kill them lol!

That said, my cousin was induced with Pitocin, and she managed to get through her 12 hour labor without an epi, though she did get Nubain. All I can say is she is one tough woman! I still don't know how she got through that. Pitocin is nasty stuff. Some women just have a higher pain tolerance, I guess. I am not among them. I wish you the best. Your baby is on the way, and as soon as you see your little bundle, it doesn't matter what you've just endured. All you can think about is how much in love with your LO you are.

tmp-610736125005207 · June 2010

I don't think you'll need the epi right away. I'm the biggest wimp and even I was able to handle the contractions until I was given the pitocin. (Labor had stalled and I wasn't progressing.)

That said, it's your body. Just go with the flow and get the epi when YOU feel you need it.

chicagoshannon · June 2010

I'd wait until you are in some pain. It usually takes a little while for the pitocin to kick in. BUT once it does the contractions will come on strong and fast. When you feel that first really painful one go for the epi.

I was able to go about 4.5 hours before getting the epidural. At that time I had a really painful contraction so I asked for the epi. In the 10 minutes it took to get the guy up there I had 4 more really painful ones. I was so glad I asked for it when I did. I was then able to take a nap for about 2 hours and then started pushing.

rcbuko · June 2010

The advantage to waiting until you can't take it anymore is that the epidural is less likely to stall labor the later it is given. My hospital allows it to be given all the way to 9 cm. I got mine at 4 cm after 10 hours of contractions and right after they broke my water. That's when the pain became unbearable. The pitocin wasn't started until after the epidural was in and working. I will do the same this time as long as everything goes according to plan.

Skruffy · June 2010

i got the epi right after being admitted. my water had already broken but I was a 1cm. My hospital gives it immediately regardless of how dilated you are. you may want to ask what your hospital rules are. The epi was amazing. I would do it again immediately if given the chance. Maybe if i had never experienced a contraction and wanted to see what they felt like I would wait, but only for a bit.

firsttogo · June 2010

Epis are not "known" to slow labor, and there are no benefits to waiting until you are 3-4 cm. My Hospital(s) do not make you wait to get it, but rather take it on an individual basis. If I had to wait until I was 4 to get it, I would be too late, as I have dilated too fast in the past.

I would take it as it comes. If you feel you need it, get it, if you can stand it, hang in there.

Everyone is different, and hospitals that make you wait to get it, do not seem to me to have very individualized treatment plans. I have never heard of two labors that are the same between the same woman, or different ones.

momofolivia · June 2010

I also have an issue with a DH that informs his pg wife how to feel, and what to do for pain meds for labor. It's not his call.

I labored for 5 hours without pain meds (induced with Cytotec), that meant that my body and my DD were under the influence of the epi for only 1.5 hours.

The pain is absolutely NOT "unnecessary pain" - it is pain with a purpose - to bring your child into the world. Being induced intendifies the feeling (at least for me it did), but that doesn't mean you can't handle it.

tsevere · June 2010

I was 4 cm when I went in for induction with DS. I toughed out the contractions for an hour and then asked for the epi. If I could do it again, I would get it the same time I got the pitocin! Lol.

With #2 I was 4cm when I got to the hospital, and 5cm within 30min. Again, I toughed it out for about an hour. I wish I had asked for it sooner, because I was in transition by the time the anesthesiologist got there. It still helped, but it could have been much easier for me!

With this one (34w1d with #3), I'm getting is ASAP. Like, as soon as I walk in the door. Otherwise I probably risk not having time for it. In which case, I should just go natural, but no thanks.

I don't think your DH is all that crazy for wanting to enjoy it. DH and I have enjoyed both the births. We were able to just hang out and talk and relax, instead of me screaming in pain and suffering.

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