TTC After a Loss 6 Months+

Sorry I was MIA today (job interviews mentioned)

I really really wanted some bump time today.  I woke up at 8am and started getting ready for the day when my phone rang and a job that I applied for over the weekend wanted me to come in and interview right then.  So I had to spiffy up and drive into their office for an interview.  Then I went to the grocery store and got food and came home and my phone rang again.  It was a woman from the State regarding another job applied for (the one I really want).  She wants me to come in for an interview on Friday!  This job would be perfect.  It's just a few miles from my house (not the 25 miles I used to commute), its a government job (great benefits) and it pays almost $10 an hour more than I was making in my last job!  So cross your fingers ladies!

Now here's the real question.  Kevin and I have decided to go forward with IVF no matter what.  I will be needing significant time off of work for a week in July for daily u/s and my ER and ET.  So if they offer me this job do I accept the position and then say, "oh by the way... I know I won't have any sick time but I have to miss a lot of work during the week of ...".  How does that exactly work?  They could decide not to hire me based on that, correct?  Is it better to tell them before I accept an offer?

Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml

Re: Sorry I was MIA today (job interviews mentioned)

  • Good Luck!!!! 

    I think the "right" thing to do would be to tell them, tough call though. 

    Marie, wife to Ron, mom to DS
  • Loading the player...
  • Get the offer in writing, then tell them.  I'd consider taking the whole week off if that would work and telling them you already have a vacation scheduled, it would be a lot easier this way. 
    imageimage
    Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle!
    April 2011 CP @ 5 weeks
  • That's exciting news!! I hope it works out!! As for the time off in July - if they offer the position, I would just let them know, at that time. Tell them you had already planned for some time off in July and while you understand you probably won't have any sick or vacation time by then, you will need to continue to keep that time off. Make it part of your hiring agreement that they allow you that week off. I would not bother trying to work on and off that week. Just my 2 cents. Most companies don't have an issue with that. Just be up-front, you don't need to tell them what you are taking the time off for. Good luck!!!
  • imageLMichelleG:
    That's exciting news!! I hope it works out!! As for the time off in July - if they offer the position, I would just let them know, at that time. Tell them you had already planned for some time off in July and while you understand you probably won't have any sick or vacation time by then, you will need to continue to keep that time off. Make it part of your hiring agreement that they allow you that week off. I would not bother trying to work on and off that week. Just my 2 cents. Most companies don't have an issue with that. Just be up-front, you don't need to tell them what you are taking the time off for. Good luck!!!

    That's a great point.  I considered working on and off around my appointments but the RE's office is like... 30 miles away from the jobsite.  Maybe I could even ask them if I could have a delayed start date because of some planned time off.  If I interview this Friday, then probably have a second interview the next week and then they always take a week or so to make a decision, it wouldn't be unreasonable for me to request a start date of July 26th would it? I mean, they assume most people will need to give an employer 2 weeks notice anyway... so this would be like me needing to give 3 weeks notice. Of course this all depends on me getting offered the damn job in the first place!!

    Thanks for the advice ladies - good stuff!!! 

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Congrats on the interviews.

    Yes - I would tell them that after they give you the job offer but before you accept.  Something like "I am so excited about this opportunity and it is my first choice, so I would love to join XYZ Company.  Before I accept, I just wanted to let you know that I have a few prior engagements during the week of _____ that I cannot reschedule.  Otherwise, I will be available to you at any time.  Is that okay?"

    This way you are being honest, they can't really say no, and you won't feel guilty taking time off from a new job because they already said it was fine. 

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Hi Kelin!!  It's been forever since I've seen you (I've been on a serious bump break).  Congrats on the interviews - I hope something pans out soon.

    Regarding time off and IVF - don't say anything until you get an offer; don't give them a reason not to hire you.  Once they decide they want your sweet kickass self, tell them you've already scheduled time off the week of July X.  Or, say you can't start until Aug 1 or whenever you are certain the transfer will be complete.  

    Good luck.  Miss you love!

    and, fingers crossed that ivf #1 is all you need :) 

  • Good luck! I wouldn't say anything till you get an offer. We have hired people at work who had previous obligations and it was worked into letting them have off after we offered them a job.

    Jenn

    image 3 IUI's all BFN

    IVF#1 BFN IVF#2 BFP, loss at 19 weeks FET#1 BFN IVF#3 BFP, m/c FET#2 BFN

    Missing our twins Zachary and Madison, lost at 19 weeks on 11/13/09, edd 4/9/10

    BFP 7/17/10, m/c 7/25/10, edd 3/25/11

    Ectopic, lost left tube 4/20/11, edd 12/6/11

    my blog

  • I would tell them after they give you an offer. I have heard of a lot of people doing that . I hope the interview goes well! Good luck!

    TTC Since Oct 08 BFP #1- 1/23/09, missed m/c 2/26/09 BFP #2- 9/8/09, natural m/c 9/16/09 BFP #3- 4/13/10, missed m/c 5/26/10 BFP #4- 4/6/11 beta#1 at 12dpo-133 prog-55.7, beta#2 at 16dpo- 861 DD born 12/8/2011 BFP#5- 11/23/12 EDD 7/25/13 Dx- Uterine septum (removed Aug 2010), endo, MTHFR C677t hetero, Factor II hetero, Low Protein S Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Good luck!!!  I agree with the PP about telling them after you get an offer.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Accept the job, then tell them. They'll survive. People with lives get new jobs all the time.
  • When I applied for a job with a big company they asked me at the end 'is there anytime in the next year you have planned to take off?'  And I said my honeymoon at X dates.  So, when I went to take my honeymoon and didn't have enough leave saved up, all I had to say was 'informed of dates at interview'.  So they knew I needed the time off, and when it was time to take the time off, it wasn't a big deal.  So I'd say if they don't ask mention it at the end.

    Good luck Kelin!  I hope you get both jobs, and have to decide which one you want! 

    ***** TTCAL/Forever Buddy to Cour10e******
    -m/c at 11w2d due to partial molar 2008 -m/c #2 2009
    Beautiful daughter born February 2011
    image
    **Ultimate TTCALer 2009**

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Good luck!

    BFP 12/18/2009. HB 1/4/2010. NO HB 1/18/2010. D&C 1/19/2010
    April 2011 IUI #1 BFN. High FSH and other issues.
    May 2011 Chose to build our family through adoption
    September 2011 Actively waiting for a match
    11/26/11 Surprise BFP * DD born 7/23/12 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Oh I hope you get the job you really want!

    Once they give you the offer you can negotiate things like the time off for the IVF- so it becomes part of the offer package.  I really wouldn't worry about it until then.  

    Forever buddy to Angelica; Natural Miscarriage Jan. 2008 @ 11 weeks; 2 years of BFFN's; DX: Unexplained IF (RE thinks IF is due to tubal issues); IUI #1 & 2= BFFN; IUI#3 = BFP, resulted in Cornual ectopic pregnancy; IUI #4 - 6 =BFFN; Our next endeavor... IVF. 1 grade AA embryo transferred on 4-23-2011 and 5 frosties. BFP Abby born 1/5/2012

    imageimageimage
  • Im crossing my fingers yuo get the job!!   Also, I agree that telling them you had already scheduled time off/vacation, etc for that week is a good way to go, in fact I've done it before and it was no issue.
     
    GL!
  • The other girls have already covered some great advice, but good luck!
  • imageKristysRedBarn:
    Get the offer in writing, then tell them.  I'd consider taking the whole week off if that would work and telling them you already have a vacation scheduled, it would be a lot easier this way. 

    Hi Kelin-

    I agree with Kristy, they don't need to know WHY you have to take the week off.  After you accept the offer, you can then negotiate any wants/needs.

    Good luck! Sounds like things are happening fast!!!

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Congrats on the interviews and good luck!!  I would mention it when they offer you the job.  I would think most companies are used to having to give new employees time off, especially when it's in the summer, because people have vacations and stuff scheduled prior to accepting a job.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageColindaP:
    Accept the job, then tell them. They'll survive. People with lives get new jobs all the time.

    This.  Congrats on the interviews!

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie Fifth Birthday tickers
    Goblin Gallup 5k 10/30/11 - 36:46
    Turkey Trot 5k 11/24/11 - 35:14
    Festival of Lights 5k 12/31/11 - 33:13
    Love the Run You're With 5k 2/13/12 - 31:58
    Backyard Burn 5 miler 3/11/12 - 1:08:42
    Cherry Blossom 10 Miler 4/1/12 - 1:58:22
    Wine Country HF 6/2/12 - TBD
    Spartan Race 8/25/12 - TBD
  • Wow...that's great. It would be awesome if you got a job that quick and one that paid better.

    As for the time off......could you pull back your start date or are they looking for immediate.  I would be honest with them when you accept, otherwise it could get messy.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • This is excellent news Kelin!  I hope it all works out.  I like the idea of a delayed start.  :::fingers crossed:::
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Good luck with the interviews!  I like the idea of the delayed start date.  By the time they finish the interview process and get you an offer letter it will probably be at least the middle of July anyway.  They don't need to know what you are doing, so if you did have to start earlier just tell them you have a commitment that you need to plan around.  I hope you get the job!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageKristysRedBarn:
    Get the offer in writing, then tell them.  I'd consider taking the whole week off if that would work and telling them you already have a vacation scheduled, it would be a lot easier this way. 

    GL Kelin! I hope you knock their socks off on Friday! And I like Kristy's advice. I'd go for the whole week off. 

    BFP 4/23/09. D&E 7/17/09 16W5D. BFP #2 3/10/10. EDD 11/15/10 Babycakes was born 11/5/10! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"