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Pregnant after a Loss
someflower6
member
i'm feeling guilty about money and maternity leave :(
someflower6
member
i only have two weeks left of work before i go on maternity leave and i'm starting to get stressed over money. i've been over the budget before and i am always as conservative as possible with my numbers, but as the time gets closer i keep finding out that i will be receiving less and less than i had originally thought. it just seems like there's always a new way for them to screw me... they have to deduct expenses for this, i wont be getting paid for that, etc etc.
husband and i have built up a bit of a nest egg, to the point where if either of us lost our jobs or was making NO income whatsoever, we'd still be able to pay bills/mortgage for at least 6 months. considering i'm only taking off work for 8-10 weeks, i know that we have that money put aside so that even without ANY maternity pay, we'd still be fine. but i still feel so guilty about having to resort to that. i feel like i'm going to be disapointing my husband by not "pulling my weight" during this time and will have to take out of our account-- not that he's ever made me feel that way, i just have always worked and never been in the position where i had to rely on savings.
this is mainly just a vent as i'm in need of some hugs, but is anyone else feeling similarly?
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Re: i'm feeling guilty about money and maternity leave :(
hugs to you!!!
I know what you mean. I feel guilty too. DH gets paid once a month and I get paid once a week - so we are so used to that. Today is my last day before maternity leave and I don't think I'll get a check for about 3 weeks - which scares me. We have prepared for it, but I still don't feel ready.
The good part is that I have been doubling up on my benefits for the past 13 weeks - that it looks like my disability payments will actually be HIGHER than my paychecks have been lately.
I would work longer, but my body just can't handle it anymore.
You are going to be just fine - try not to worry!
((((hugs)))) I know how you feel! You need to look at it as though having and nurturing your new baby during those 1st few weeks is a job in itself. Since no one else wants to recognize that and pay you for it...you need to pay yourself...and give yourself some credit that what you will be doing is far more important than bringing home the bacon! Im sure your husband agrees, too!
If it continues to bother you, you can make up a plan for how to replace those funds when you return to work! Just make sure you give it some time to figure out just how much your LO will cost you first!!
don't feel the slightest bit guilty about "not pulling your weight". You'll be taking care of your newborn and recovering from delivery. I'm positive your DH won't feel disappointed. In fact, if anything, he may feel like he's disappointing you that you even have to go back to work (if that's the case).
Hugs.
(((HUGS)))
I completey understand what you are going through. To be frank, my DH and I are kind of screwed. I am planning on taking a decent maternity leave because I feel that it will be such an important time for our family, that I am not planning on missing out because of my job (which I am not liking so much right now). We don't have much of a nest egg, because most of our money has been wrapped up in this fixer-upper of a house. What I do have is a very understanding and generous family that will help/lend if it becomes absolutely necessary, so DH and I are going to try to make the traditional (at least 8 week) maternity leave work.
I think it will be very hard, and I will essentially have no income coming in. I am not currently under contract (should have pushed for this but there were other circumstances), and I work for a small enough company that is probably not required to give me any benefits. DH is just working his way up in his current position, and is not getting paid what he is worth. Despite all of this, I think I am leaving at least 2 weeks early from my job to continue fixing up this mess of a house!
I think it will all be okay. I am lucky because I know that no matter what happens I should be able to find some type of work, and I have an awesome support system. Life will not be luxurious, but we will make do, like our parents before us who had virtually no money, and did well in the end.
Look on the bright side, it sounds like you have a really substantial amount of savings for this!