do your friends hide they are PG from you?

so1966 · June 2010

I have friends that have done this and tell me after the fact that they have a baby or I find out from someone else. This has happend twice already. I have made every effort to stay in touch w/ my friends through emails, bday cards, xmas cards and such. That's the best that I can do right now. Pls no flames. I really don't want to go through my nightmare these past few years w/ them and fall apart. After all, for them it's been enjoying their mommyhood and all I have had is bad news after bad news. They know I have no baby and know I've seen drs and that's enough for me. I honestly am not good company and don't want to put on some happy fake face.

So...one friend in particular that I've kept in touch with, did tell me when she was PG w/ #2 through email and I sent a gift and now with #3, she tell me a few months after the baby is born and that's only because I'm checking in w/ her to see how she's doing. She told me that she was nervous about telling me. So... I respond that "I'm glad she finally told me and that I would have been hurt finding out from someone else. After all, that's why I stay in touch w/ friends to see how they are doing."

Do these people think that I cannot deal w/ reality? After all, there are babies everywhere...at the mall, at the park, at the movies.

Thanks for reading/listening...

lovemygs · June 2010

We decided to keep our IF issues within the immediate family. Our parents and brothers/sisters are the only people who know, so no, no one hides pregnancies from us.

I'm sure your friend was just trying to protect your feelings. Some people handle an IF friend wonderfully...others not so much.

lovemymonkey · June 2010

hey S,

I know friends have dreaded telling me about their PGs and sometimes I've been the last to find out, but I've never had anyone not tell me until after the baby is born! that's just ridiculous!! that would definitely upset me. I totally understand how they may not want to upset you, but I think a good friend would figure out a way to tell you b/c a good friend would know that even though you would be sad for you, you'd still be happy for them.

((((((hugs))))))

ginger67 · June 2010

My friends really can't. However my BF tries to hide when his friends are pregnant. Poor guy, I think I actually give him an attitude when I find out!

Dragonfly1226 · June 2010

Yes... but never that long. They usually struggle to figure out how to tell me, but they do.

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