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Not totally loving being on maternity leave...

bethann3181bethann3181 member
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Don't get me wrong - I love DS and taking care of him (4 1/2 weeks old), but being at home with him is wearing on me right now.  Our feedings have been a source of stress for me - we are in the midst of trying to figure out which formula is best for him.  We went from Similac Soy (super gassy and constipated), to Enfamil Gentlease (even more constipated) to Enfamil Lipil (regulated bowels, but now he spits up way more than he should be, and is extremely fussy after a feeding with a red face and squealing).  I feel like he's only happy when he's in his swing lately, not when we hold him.  I also am not the sit around at home type, but it feels really difficult to get myself together and him with his fussiness to get him out the door many days, so we are inside most of the day.  I am just wishing there was a little more to being at home with him.  I'm not saying I'm looking forward to going back to work and not being with him, but thought I would really cherish this time at home, and I'm feeling rather neutral about it.  Anyone else feel this way?

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Re: Not totally loving being on maternity leave...

  • lmpdjclmpdjc member
    I feel this way sometimes, too.  We're at about 8 1/2 weeks now and some days I think I could go crazy.  I love being with my little man, but I am looking forward to going back to work for 2 days a week in a few weeks.  I must be bi-polar or something because even as I typed that, I got teary about leaving him for work! lol
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  • JessesGirl81JessesGirl81

    I had my first son in November 2007, he had a horrible traumatic birth and was in the NICU, I was depressed about that, on top of it being winter and being extremely sleep deprived, I hate to say this but I was MISERABLE during my maternity leave and counted down the days until I went back to work. 

    I felt so conflicted in my feelings, of course I didn't want to leave him but was not at all happy at home. Once he was around 6 weeks I finally felt comfortable venturing out with him and that helped- since it was winter I would get a coffee and walk around the mall...something so simple did a world of good for me!

    I am now home with my 2nd ( he is 3.5 weeks) and my 2.5 year old- being spring helps and I am more seasoned as a mom...this time I am enjoying myself immensely =)  Don't beat yourself up about your feelings...and it DOES get BETTER!!!

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  • jarbatzjarbatz member

    Yes I totally know how you are feeling and its very normal!   Being home w/ DD drove me crazy the first few weeks and seriously by 6 weeks I was considering going back to work early (I was scheduled for 12 weeks maternity leave) b/c I was miserable.   I had envisioned maternity leave so differently...like I'd be playing with my baby all day and taking her places.   But really, the most I would do that early on was take her to the grocery store.  It was still too cold to take her for walks and her window of "happy time" was SO short.

    BUT - it does get better.  After 6 weeks, she started sleeping longer stretches, smiling, cooing, being more responsive, etc. 

    I just went back to work yesterday and I was sad to send DD off to daycare but it also felt really good coming into work, and I never thought I'd feel that way. 

    You will start to enjoy your time with LO more and more each day...don't worry! 

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  • BottomStarBottomStar member
    I'm a much better mom since I went back to work!  I love my DD and there are days when she's just so happy and adorable in the morning that it's hard to leave her, but I know I couldn't stay home with her all the time because I'd go nuts.  About 4 weeks in, I started working from home a little and it was almost a relief to be back doing something I was good at.  Nothing like motherhood to make a perfectly competent adult feel completely helpless!
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  • bethann3181bethann3181 member
    Ahhh...sigh of relief!  Thanks, everyone.  I haven't talked to anyone about feeling this way, as I thought I would be the only one experiencing this!  I am so glad to hear that others feel the same way!  I know things will get better - it just seems like DS was happier in the beginning and as we are dealing with his feeding issues, he's becoming unhappier for much longer stretches of the day now.  It's heartbreaking!   Hopefully we'll get them resolved soon.  Thanks again for the reassurance!
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  • nicobean1nicobean1 member
    Oh, totally. I love my son, but it's becoming really clear that I could not be a SAHM. I think it'll get better when he gets a little older and we can get out more without me worrying that he'll melt down, but for now, it's really challenging to get out of the house.
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  • kari0426kari0426

    I came back to work on Tuesday and feel so good!  I love my baby boy but after eight weeks of being home with him all day (DH works long hours) I was so ready to be around adults again.  DS seems to like his daycare, he's so happy and content when I pick him up and he's taking naps for the provider (which he never did for me).  I think it's been good for both of us to "see other people"! 

    To all SAHM's, I have so much respect for you!  

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