How do you do it? — The Bump
Multiples

How do you do it?

I've reached a point where I feel like I can't take it anymore. I'm physically EXHAUSTED. Keeping a house clean and taking care of a busy toddler while 28 weeks pregnant with twins is IMPOSSIBLE. By 11:00 this morning I already had a major break down and was ready to go to bed and not wake up until tomorrow. Please tell me I'm not alone in feeling like this. How do you deal with it? TIA

Re: How do you do it?

  • I have alot of help- that's the only way I'd survive physically and mentally.  I applaud you for doing it all on your own.

    Do you have family you can call to help?  Or maybe find a young person to take care of your toddler for a few hours/day? 

  • Hire a cleaning lady. 

    After 2 rounds of IVF & 2 rounds of FET, we were blessed with identical twin girls!
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  • janjagjanjag
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    image kimarino13:
    Hire a cleaning lady. 

    ITA.  even if it's not in your budget... it can be short term.  also i like the suggestion of having a young person play with your toddler.  hang in there!

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  • image janjag:

    image kimarino13:
    Hire a cleaning lady. 

    ITA.  even if it's not in your budget... it can be short term.  also i like the suggestion of having a young person play with your toddler.  hang in there!

    Definitely! I was able to do very little cleaning by the third tri, and that was without chasing after a toddler. Either that or your H or other relatives will really need to step in and take over the bulk of the cleaning. 

    fraternal twin boys born january 2009
  • My H pretty much does everything, and I pitch in the tiny bit I can when I feel okay. But for the most part, watching the kid and keeping the house manageable falls to him for now. And I nap. Any time I can.
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  • hire a cleaning lady...pronto! you will probably be able to use one once the twins get here anyways :-P

    is there a college nearby? college students are always looking for some extra money for a few hours btw classes.

    I don't know how you are doing either....I am a few weeks behind and it is all I can do to maintain our house and keep up with ds. Thankfully my inlaws are here and we have ALOT of playdates at my house because I can sit for at least 1.5 hours while ds plays with his friends in a contained area, lol I don't have to chase him nearly as much! and we also do alot of playdates are friends house...especially with it getting so hot : /

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  • One foot in front of the other.  We don't have any family around, so it was just DH and me (we always asked someone to come stay with me & DD when DH had Army weekends, though).

    DH took over everything.  I did what I felt up to, which wasn't much.  He carried the weight.

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  • You are definitely not alone.   I may be delusional, but I think things might actually be easier after the twins arrive and I get my normal body back.  I REALLY hope we can find room in the budget for a cleaning person even if it's just once a month. 

    My H just started working from home one day a week, which helps, and I've lowered my expectations on what the house looks like.    It makes me really sad that I can't be as active with DD as she needs me to be, but I just keep telling myself it's just temporary.

  • image kimarino13:
    Hire a cleaning lady. 

    This.  I had one and I didn't have a toddler, just a husband to clean up after.  I told DH that I just couldn't physically do it anymore....keep the house clean and we hired someone.  It was the BEST. 

  • DH and I were just having this conversation last night.  We have our house on the market so he was like "HOW do you plan on having this house in "showing" order in the next couple weeks?!?!"  But I try to just do a little bit during the day here and there.  As far as keeping up w/DD?? well this kid wears me OUT probably more mentally than physically.  She's at her terrible 2 stage and says NO to basically everything I say.  I basically am picking my battles w/her and I try to take her out to play as much as I can, a. wear her out so she doesn't have cabin fever and go nuts in the house, b. get additional people to watch her and c. I get to socialize w/other mom's at the same time.

    Thankfully DH is pitching in.  Hang in there, I feel your pain!

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