I'm Scared To Death (no Flames)

Sarahp63 · May 2010

Ok, I know symptoms come and go, but serioously I know its never a good sign. I went through this with my loss. Ok, my bbs have been super sore, I mean super sore, yesterday I noticed they weren't really hurting, and now they do not hurt AT ALL. I am losing symptoms (more than just bbs). I know you will say this is normal, and I need to relax. BUT my intuition is never wrong and I have a sickening feeling over this. I'm a hot mess over here.

jds0521 · May 2010

Big ((hugs)) - when is your next appt?

Sarahp63 · May 2010

jds0521:
Big ((hugs)) - when is your next appt?

I meet with the midwife next week. But no u/s or anything scheduled. And I never had spotting or bledding with my last m/c.

jds0521 · May 2010

Are you still under the care of your RE? Can you call him/her or your nurse to discuss your options? I'd at least try to explain the situation & see if there's anything they can do to help ease your mind. Are you on Endometrion or PIO? I know you don't want to hear this, but everyone always says every pregnancy is different, just /c your boobs were super sore last time & they had a day of not as sore this time doesn't always equal bad news. I was on Estrace & Endometrin & my boobs were only slightly sore. GL sweetie.

ETA: Also, did you see the h/b with your last pregnancy? The chance of m/c goes way down after seeing a healthy h/b & you have seen it twice!

Sarahp63 · May 2010

jds0521:

Are you still under the care of your RE? Can you call him/her or your nurse to discuss your options? I'd at least try to explain the situation & see if there's anything they can do to help ease your mind. Are you on Endometrion or PIO? I know you don't want to hear this, but everyone always says every pregnancy is different, just /c your boobs were super sore last time & they had a day of not as sore this time doesn't always equal bad news. I was on Estrace & Endometrin & my boobs were only slightly sore. GL sweetie.

ETA: Also, did you see the h/b with your last pregnancy? The chance of m/c goes way down after seeing a healthy h/b & you have seen it twice!

Yeah we saw a good hb. And my boobs have been super sore this time. Its just so hard not to freak out. But its also hard to just chill out when you know this feeling all too well.

krissyh21 · May 2010

Around 7 weeks was when I started not noticing my sore boobs and I was getting energy back. My OB told me that around 7-8 weeks is when a lot of people who had early symptoms start feeling better. I hope that is the case for you as it was for me. (((hugs)))

lovemymonkey · May 2010

oh sweetie, I'm sorry you're so scared. I'm the same way, reading into every little symptom or what I think is a lack of symptoms. No flames here, ever!

Could you ask your RE for another u/s? That's what I would do, for peace of mind.

GL and please keep us updated!!! Parying all is well with your LO.

itsmevkb · May 2010

First, I will never tell you to relax.

Second, I can say that with each of my pregnancies I've had less and less sore breasts. I think your body can sort of get used to the hormones and you have less of a symptom as a result.

Third, with this pregnancy I've noticed a lot more off and on symptoms than with any of my others. Of course, I don't know yet if that is good or bad. However, with my last pregnancy, the one that I lost, I had horrible morning sickness up until the day I miscarried and so in the end that really didn't mean anything good. I just feel as though you can't trust having or not having symptoms.

Fourth, ask for another ultrasound. There is nothing wrong with asking and them letting you have one for peace of mind.

Fifth, I am right there with you and having a sickening feeling with this pregnancy. I'm hoping that my intuition is being effected by my previous loss. I hope it is the same for you.

howleyshell · May 2010

Pregnancy after the long road of IF is stressful.

Pregnancy after IF AND previous loss(es) is almost impossible. Time seems to crawl so slowly between appointments and reassurance seems tough to come by.

All I can tell you is that I lived u/s to u/s and doppler to doppler.

I was lucky that I had an OB who "got it" and told me any time I was freaking I could come in for reassurance (doppler or u/s in the early days before doppler would work).

Talk to your care provider about your concerns and ask what they can do for you.

In the mean time.... just know that it's 100% normal to be out of your mind scared. The only advice I have is to do everything you can to keep yourself busy. A project around the house, lots of planned outtings with DH and gal pals, a new book that you can get sucked into, TV, movies, ANYTHING that sucks your mind away from this to help you pass the time.

(((HUGS)))

jds0521 · May 2010

Sarahp63:
jds0521:

Are you still under the care of your RE? Can you call him/her or your nurse to discuss your options? I'd at least try to explain the situation & see if there's anything they can do to help ease your mind. Are you on Endometrion or PIO? I know you don't want to hear this, but everyone always says every pregnancy is different, just /c your boobs were super sore last time & they had a day of not as sore this time doesn't always equal bad news. I was on Estrace & Endometrin & my boobs were only slightly sore. GL sweetie.

ETA: Also, did you see the h/b with your last pregnancy? The chance of m/c goes way down after seeing a healthy h/b & you have seen it twice!

Yeah we saw a good hb. And my boobs have been super sore this time. Its just so hard not to freak out. But its also hard to just chill out when you know this feeling all too well.

Well I'm praying that everything is fine! Call your RE to see if you can get another u/s or something. GL & let us know how it goes.

nikinikinine · May 2010

Sarah I really hope that this is just a case of symptoms popping up and disappearing. big ((((HUGS)))))

Temp893722312503334 · May 2010

I am so sorry. I know exactly how you feel - not only are we bitter about our IF, we are ultra paranoid and have a wall up so that we don't ever let ourselves get too excited.

It sucks. But I agree with pp, I think you should call your RE and see if you can go in. After talking with my nurse and RE, they told me to come in whenever I am worried or having pain etc. I do think they get it.

Good luck honey!

dianne2007 · May 2010

Sarah- I am really sorry that you are scared right now. I agree with pps that you should try and call the RE to see if they can see you for another u/s.

I hope that your intuition is so very wrong and that this pg is just different.(((Hugs)))

Dochas · May 2010

I was convinced between every appointment that I had lost the baby. I would honestly say to my DH "if I'm still pregnant...". I know telling you not to worry won't help - but you will never be flamed here for being nervous. Or irrational. Or downright crazy. Well, maybe crazy.

And I definitely had disappearing symptoms.

pooman · May 2010

I know after TTC for so many years my intuition was totally f-ed up. The fact that you had a miscarriage would just add to that.

I'm almost 15 weeks and just beginning to accept the fact that this could work. The entire first trimester EVERY u/s EVERY re visit I was just waiting to be told the baby didn't make it. I would watch my husband watch the U/S screen and refused to look til he told me he saw the heartbeat. Then I'd be so happy...for about a day. The doubt would slip right back in waiting for the next appointment.

Infertility takes so much from us. I'm sorry you have to worry. I will say logically if a friend told you she saw a healthy h/b twice and was worried because her symptoms were coming and going you would probably tell her not to worry, it's normal, the chances of a m/c are small. It's sad we can't accept that for ourselves. :::HUGS:::

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