How did you know what to do when babies came home?

LakeGenevaBride · May 2010

I've read all these books on feeding and sleeping, etc. It is all turning in to one big blur. How in the world did you know what to do? I've been so focused on buying stuff for the babies, I think I've overlooked that fact that I have no idea what to do when the babies come home. Did you have a plan, or did you figure it out as you went along? OK, panic mode is starting to set in!

Dec31stBride · May 2010

Book learning and trial by fire! The key is to use instincts and go with the flow. All babies are different. There is no such thing as a schedule for infants - unless a NICU got them into one, and in the case of trying to keep multiples on the same feeding schedule.

Wantastickybaby · May 2010

My mom was here, so we relied on her a lot! I also posted questions on this board and called my friends who already have kids. You'll see (hopefully) that the first two weeks are actually pretty easy - they sleep A LOT - so that will give you some time to figure things out.

A few things I would suggest setting up ahead of time:

A place to breast feed/pump. Have snacks, water, t.v. remote, magazines handy - as well as your pump if you're pumping.

Have bottles clean and ready to go, as well as a bottle rack.

Have some meals frozen for you and DH, unless you're going to have family there to cook for you.

Wash baby clothes ahead of time so that they're ready to go. A friend of mine didn't open or wash anything until the babies came home and she was always scrambling to unwrap/open things.

You'll be fine! It will be stressful at times, but you'll get into a rhythm pretty quickly. Best of luck!

keg · May 2010

You just do what needs to be done. ;-) Our DDs were only in the NICU for a couple days, but they were on a 3 hour feeding schedule so basically we changed, fed, burped times two every three hours and they basically slept between feedings. You just slowly figure stuff out and/or make it up as you go along. :-)

aniticipation · May 2010

Ditto having things ready - inlcuding diapers and wipes out, co-sleeper or whatever you're using made, lots of onesies, swaddle blankets and burp clloths washed.

We were lucky and had a ton of help. when you first get home, all they will do it sleep and eat so you have some time to adjust

Rangergal9 · May 2010

With my DD we just went with the flow. Like others mentioned you can try to get them on a schedule but they will make their own. Just be confident in your ability and you'll settle in. It was hard enough with one baby, so I am just trying to remain calm about the craziness that will ensue with two.

macchiatto · May 2010

I also tried to have everything set up and ready to go, and I read Secrets of the Baby Whisperer beforehand, Mothering Multiples, and a few other books. I also ended up reading HSHHC and watching the HBOTB DVD when the babies were just a month or so old, and they were both really helpful!

jalaiaa · May 2010

You figure it out as you go and ask lots of questions of the ladies here to figure out the rest.

healthynut · May 2010

As pp said, a NICU sometimes gets them on a schedule, which is what happened for us. The schedule was every three to four hours by the time they came home, so we stuck to that (meaning feeding, diaper, etc.). Unfortunately, DD came home 6 days before DS and by the time they were together again, the schedule didn't exactly match, but we went with the flow and figured it out. It's a lot of figuring out what works as you go along. Some parents work in shifts where you handle both while the other takes a break, and some work together and each handle one, and some do a mix. You'll try all different things and eventually settle on what works for you and your family. I also agreet to have a pumping station with all the necessities set up. If you end up using formula, I would suggest making bottles in advance. H & H!

CER+MEL · May 2010

Have a general plan of how you intend to feed them and where they'll sleep for the first couple of weeks, and plan to adjust all of that based on how things go. Read books, watch videos (HBOTB helped us in those first weeks), and have discussions with your DH to get an idea of how you'll handle everything, but really those first few days in the hospital will help you get started.

The routine we started in the hospital was DH would change the babies' diapers and bring them to me to feed when it was time (about every two hours). They would go to sleep at that point until the cycle started again. At home we set up a bassinette (actually a mini co-sleeper) in the living room for them to nap in and planned for them to sleep in their cribs at night with angelcare monitors.

Needless to say we didn't sleep much those first few nights and ended up taking shifts (still do) where DH takes care of any between-feeding fussiness from bedtime until 2 a.m. and I take over until morning. We both still get up with every feeding and do our parts.

We're still doing all of this for the most part, but we now have two mini co-sleepers in the living room, the feedings have stretched to every three hours, fussiness between feedings is minimal, they're awake a little more, and I do it all on my own during the weekdays.

jbl126 · May 2010

The NICU got them on a schedule and we tried to stick to that. But I asked my mom lots of questions. And even call the pedi more than I like to admit in the beginning. Part of it was definitely trial and error.

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