How to tell 4 yr old about strangers?

Re: How to tell 4 yr old about strangers?

• elm1032004

  May 2010

  I told her it's ok to say hi to people when she is with Mommy or Daddy (or other adults that she knows and take care of her).

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• docmay25 member

  May 2010

  I would definetely get a book to read.  We found some good ones at our library.  This helped to reinforce what we told them.

  I tell my kids that it is okay to say hi to people, like in our neighborhood, as long as you have mommy or daddy with you.  So, they have learned that when we are out somewhere and they want to talk to someone they ask us first if it is okay becasue mommy and daddy can tell us who is safe.

  I also want to make sure they know that if they got lost and I was not with them that there are safe strangers that they can talk to to help them.  i tell them a police officer, fireman, cashier (if at the store) or if they can't find any of those ask another mommy that they see who has children with her.

  We also did a lot of role playing with my kids (which they loved doing).

  For example:

  Me pretending to be stanger "Jack I have some extra candy would you like some"   DC "no, I have to ask my mommy or daddy first"  (tell them to leave and tell a grown up)  Practicing for us was important for them to understand.

  
  
  
  

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• Andrewsgal member

  May 2010

  -auntie-:

  There are some good books designed to start this dialog.

  Don't forget to cover the bits about "grown ups should ask other gronw ups for help" and don't forget to cover the uglier truth that most kids who are molested are victims of people they know well.

  Auntie, can you explain thiis one?

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• Grantand member

  May 2010

  Andrewsgal:

  -auntie-:

  There are some good books designed to start this dialog.

  Don't forget to cover the bits about "grown ups should ask other gronw ups for help" and don't forget to cover the uglier truth that most kids who are molested are victims of people they know well.

  Auntie, can you explain thiis one?

  To me, this is to counteract the ploy that  a creeper could use: "Oh, I lost my puppy, can you help me look for it?" with a kid, but if they really needed help they should be asking another grown-up, not a child.

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• shouldbworkin

  May 2010

  We read a Bearenstain Bear book about it and then had a talk about who was and wasn't a stranger, things you should and shouldn't do with strangers, etc.  Not sure if it helped at all.  I used our neighbor as an example since we don't know him well.  And now he asks if our neighbor is a stranger every time we drive by his house.  Not exactly the intended effect.

  DS1 age 7, DD age 5 and DS2 born 4/3/12

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• Andrewsgal member

  May 2010

  -auntie-:

  Grantand:

  Andrewsgal:

  -auntie-:

  There are some good books designed to start this dialog.

  Don't forget to cover the bits about "grown ups should ask other gronw ups for help" and don't forget to cover the uglier truth that most kids who are molested are victims of people they know well.

  Auntie, can you explain thiis one?

  To me, this is to counteract the ploy that  a creeper could use: "Oh, I lost my puppy, can you help me look for it?" with a kid, but if they really needed help they should be asking another grown-up, not a child.

   

  This exactly.

   

  It's the perp MO to play on a nice little kid's willingness to help that often gets them into trouble. Especially little girls who are "pleasers" need to be taught it's OK to say "no" to an adult.

  Ah Got it, I am a little slow today. Thanks!

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