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Hawaii Babies
first day back to work went ok -w/ an eating Q
kind of long...
I was gone from 7:30-4. Everything went great and he was so happy to see me when I got home 
MIL had trouble getting him to take a nap so that already had an immediate effect on his sleep. He was overly tired by the time I got home so he napped from 5-6:30 and then fell asleep at 8 and wanted to STTN, we usually like to let him stay up until about 10 and then he would sleep until 5, eat and then go back to sleep until 7-8. He woke up at 1am and 4am and then wanted to be up for good at 6am. His interrupted sleep could also partially be blamed on the fact that he knows how to roll now and has started to roll over in his sleep and then gets mad when he gets stuck on his belly or side and isn't really awake enough to figure out what to do. (so nice that he's in the ARCS so I can just reach over and get him flipped to his back - that helped for the 1am wake up).
next issue - he hated the bottle last week so I was nervous he wouldn't eat. He had the opposite problem. He hate 12oz while I was gone, including 5 oz at one sitting. Does that sound right? I did the Kellymom calculator and he use to eat 9 times so I made bottles with a little over 3oz. in each (average feeds would be 2.7 with a high of 3.3). Sounds ok, but what concerns me is for the next feed MIL took it upon herself to pour 2 bottles together and he ate another 4oz right away. DH was home for that feeding and said Jack sucked it down, stopped (kind of fell asleep) and when he woke up 20 mins. later MIL immediately offered him the bottle again. She has only formula fed before and I think she mentally doesn't believe he should be ok with less than a full small bottle and she kind of seemed really proud at how much she "got" him to eat. I will see how today goes because I know every day can be different and I need to give it a while to see a "pattern" but for the time being, what do you think of the feeds I have explained and how would you bring it up to her? from the looks of the pacifier post her "he must be hungry" mentality is definitely not rare (especially with that generation??) but I do think she probably offers food more than necessary, but how do you really know? If he eats when re-offered maybe he is actually still hungry?
I should say that MIL is great, she seems to really want to please us and follow our preferences and I know she truly loves the time she gets to spend with Jack.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: first day back to work went ok -w/ an eating Q
I can't say for sure, but maybe he's having a growth spurt? I know sometimes they will eat more/nurse longer when this is happening. Usually they will stop eating when they are full.
Was his overall intake the same, or was it more? Do you usually burp him more during feedings than she does? Is your concern that he's eating too fast/too much/in too short of a time?
Are you following the Baby Whisperer/EASY system? This is what I thought of when I read that she offered him the bottle after he woke up.
sorry for all the qs, just trying to get more info.
Let's see - I guess I'm more concerned (as was DH) that her first instinct was to reach for the bottle. We don't follow any system, but he did kind of self regulate into a pattern - wake, eat, change, play, sleep (eating does not usually make him drowsy, he has never been a "nurse down" type baby).
I guess I'm also concerned about how much he seemed to eat while I was gone because he had 2 feeds before I left (5am and 7:30am) then ate 12 oz while I was gone (in 3 feeds) and then distractedly ate 2 times and then once before bed. I just didn't like how he seemed a little uninterested in BFing when I got home, I think he was probably pretty really full, but it could also have to do with the fact that he was overtired - so perhaps the bigger issue would be working with MIL to help her find ways to encourage napping.
I know he should self regulate how much he eats, but if he is constantly being offered the bottle b/c MIL thinks any peep signals hunger and/or thinks she really needs to get him to eat as much as possible I'm curious to know if he can still successfully self regulate... hmmmm. I guess we will know more in the coming days.
I don't really know what's normal, but A has been eating a ton lately. I store milk in 3oz bottles but now he can eat 4-5 oz in one sitting. We use the Breastflow bottles too, so it's not like he effortlessly guzzles it down. I also attribute it to a growth spurt.
Maybe MIL can feed him the portions you prepare and only give him more if he's still hungry. That's what seems to work for us.
Glad your first day back was okay. As for the feeding question, every baby is different and maybe he's gearing up for growth spurt?
DH and my mom have to cup feed Libby when I am at work because she refuses to take a bottle. She used to only take 2 oz. mid-morning and now is up to 3 oz. and sometimes was another 3 oz. in the mid-afternoon. I come home for lunch and nurse her. So our routine for feedings (the times are sometime between the two listed)is:
4:30-5 am - nurse 15-20 minutes (she'll go back to sleep until around 8:30-9:00 am)
9:30-10 am - cup feed 2-3 oz.
12:15-12:30 pm - nurse (usually just 5-7 minutes)
3-3:30 pm - cup feed (sometimes) or she'll hold out and nurse at 4 pm when I get home
5:30-6 pm - nurse (15-20 minutes)
9-9:30 pm - nurse (7-10 minutes)
10:30-11 pm - nurse (this is when we come to bed with her) (15-20 minutes)
2:30-3 am - nurse (co-sleeping) (5-7 minutes)
J and my mom have identified her "hunger" cry versus her "need a diaper change" or "I'm sleepy" cry...maybe you can work with your MIL to do the same so that her "go to" isn't the bottle. Also, BF babies tend to overeat when they're given bottles because they don't have to "work" for the milk in the same way. Is he gassy or spitting up a lot after the bottles? If so, that may be an indication that he's getting too much. MIL should bottle feed in a manner similar to BF...offer breaks, etc. and see if he wants more by offering the nipple but not putting it in his mouth. Most babies will instinctively suck if something put in their mouth and it's not always an indication of hunger.
Here's a great article on how to bottle feed a breastfed baby. Perhaps you can go over it with your MIL?
https://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/bottle-feeding.html
TTC/PG Blog | Mommy Blog
ok, you guys are making me feel a lot better. I will see how things play out this week, both with eating and napping. Each day it will get easier for MIL to figure out what he needs and we can figure out how much food he does need.
Today I made 3.5 oz bottles and asked her to keep them like that rather than make monster bottles just on the premise that it will waste less BM - but said she could definitely offer a second bottle if he wants more.
That sounds like a totally reasonable solution.
I vote for making bottles on the smaller side too so less is wasted. That's a good idea from Lori too - just showing him the bottle instead of putting it in his mouth - my LO is now to the point where if he's hungry, he doesn't want to let me sit down before he gets it - he will grab it and put his face over it (if I'm holding the bottle upright) and cry until I put it in his mouth!
yes, I agree, I will show MIL the bottle feeding link and also ask her to try to offer the bottle w/out putting in his mouth right away.
I think the thing that totally got me concerned to begin with is the way she seemed so proud of how much she was able to get him to eat. I think that is the wrong attitude so hopefully we talked her through that last night.
You can also have her add an ounce at a time to the original bottle rather than starting a new one. We do this to minimize waste and prevent overfeeding. That stuff is liquid gold!
My mom did the same thing. I was like, I'm not trying to starve him, you know! But after he kept throwing it up and was diagnosed with the reflux, that's when she stopped with that attitude. But she doesn't see him more than about once/month, so it's not really an issue for us like it is w/ you. She also was more ok with it when she saw that he was in the 50th %ile for weight and he wasn't being underfed!