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So...all hell broke loose last night.

MDBabyMamaMDBabyMama
in Single Parents

My STBX started a new job yesterday. Well, because of clearance issues, he was let go before the day was over. He's been dealing with depression due to job loss over the last year and hasn't done anything about it. So, yesterday he calls me and tells me he feels "emotionally unstable," and could I please pick up DS? Obviously, not an issue for me. So I go home with DS last night, no word from STBX. Around 10 pm I go to take the dog out one last time, and notice she's limping badly. I have no clue what happened but she can barely walk, so I call STBX because I'm home with the baby and can't go anywhere. He's drunk, doesn't want to talk, doesn't care about the dog. I asked him where he was and he refused to tell me, SCREAMED at me for turning the conversation around on him (whatever the hell that means) and hung up on me. The poor dog started walking around a little better and didn't seem to be in terrible pain, so I decided to wait until this morning to call the vet. Early this morning STBX calls and says he'll take the dog to the vet and that he's sorry for last night.

We start mediation today, and I am totally freaked out by his behavior. We went through a patch last year when he was acting totally irrational (threatening to clean me out, trying to kick me out of the house, spending money like water), but over the past few months he seemed to be getting it together and acting appropriately. Now I just don't trust him. I don't trust him to play fair, I don't trust him to make good decisions, and I don't trust him with DS. I hate this. I just want him gone and I want him to realize that he has no business screwing up our lives like this. I wonder what today will bring...

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Re: So...all hell broke loose last night.

  • fauxshelleyfauxshelley member

    You need to act like a single parent.  Just bc he hasn't moved out yet doesn't mean that he will be willing to do squat for you, your son, or the dog.  If my dog was injured (I mean emergency) and I were home alone with my children, I would pack everyone in the car and go to the vet.  If I thought it could wait until the morning, I would make the dog as comfortable as possible and take her in the morning (after dropping kids off).  There is not a chance in hell that I would call my ex for help, bc he would just add to my stress.

    You don't need him or the drama that comes along with him.  If you can't physically move out and on with your life yet, do it mentally.   Good luck!

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  • MDBabyMamaMDBabyMama
    You're right. I'm still in the headspace of thinking we're a team. He asks so much of me and my family, I feel like I can do the same of him. But we're not a team anymore, and I can't rely on him. And we all need to get better at telling him no. He's gotten really good at manipulating and taking advantage, and I need to do a better job of protecting myself. Thanks for the much-needed slap in the face! Yes
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