Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

My job makes me hate myself.

I know this is the wrong board, but you ladies have great things to say...I don't feel like posting on a board I don't know right now.

I manage 50 nurses. One of them has a chronically sick husband who is a quadriplegic. She is his sole caretaker. She is constantly giving us staffing problems because she must be in and out to take care of him.

My boss (who is one cold-hearted jerk in many ways) has told me that if she can't be there, she's not a fit with our company.

She called tonight and said that she has to go with her husband to the hospital tomorrow. And I had to be the one to tell her that if she couldn't find someone to take her place in the clinic, she'd have to work. She almost started crying and said, "What would you do if it was your baby?" Well, that was it for me.

I opened a bottle of wine and locked myself here in the office.

This job makes me hate myself.

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Re: My job makes me hate myself.

  • ahhhhhh thats awful!   try to forget your work life when you go home!  i know it's not easy and i feel your pain but try to turn it off and enjoy your family at home and don't feel too guilty about your "day job".  hang in there!
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  • I'm so sorry.  Did you explain that it's YOUR boss that is making her do that?  I wonder if there's any program out there designed to help that poor woman?  Some sort of assistance of some sort?  It just seems like there should be.
  • I know, right? I can't imagine having to work a full time job and take care of a handicapped husband. Not to mention she just came through surgery herself! This poor woman. I want to hug her, not reprimand her.

     

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  • Ritzy19Ritzy19 member
    Sounds like you're in a tough situation.  Being caught in the middle is never a fun place to be. 

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  • aforstaforst member
    I'm so sorry, that is a really rough spot to be in, for both you and her.  Does she qualify for any FMLA to cover her absences related to her husband?  She might not get paid, but it should protect her job.  I'm sure you have already looked into all of that, just curious.  Hang in there!!
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  • Caregiving is a tough job alone. Why not give her some resources, because it's going to happen again. Employee Assistance Programs are very helpful. Care.com, Maybe the Dept of Aging (age requirement) but at least she can find other support. Thats an awful position to be in for you. 
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  • That's why I'm thankful I have a union job.  What a shiity thing to have to decide between caring for your disabled husband and working your job. 

    Hang in there.  It's not you doing it, it's your boss.

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