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I HATE feeding him and that makes me SO sad...

osscott4510osscott4510
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Everyone talks about what a great bonding time and how amazing it is to spend this time with their LO and I would give ANYTHING to have that experience with my little guy....

EVERY feeding is a fight, he has reflux so I have to burp him after every ounce and every time I take the bottle out of his mouth to do this he screams bloody murder and while I am burping him he kicks his feet so hard right into my C Section incision which does not feel so great (although getting better now that we are 8 weeks out, but for weeks my entire stomach felt bruised and I winced anytime it got touched...) then when we are done feeding I keep him upright for a half hour so he doesn't puke.  At the end of that half hour I change his diaper and I still have a 50/50 chance of him barfing all over (I tried changing him before but he always pees while he eats and I just can't leave him sitting in it...)  I go through at least 10-15 bibs/burp cloths (I have started using hand towels) a day and wash them every night so I have enough for the next day.  He wears about 5 or 6 outfits a day and I wear about 3 or 4 if I'm lucky.

All that being said, we have found that after our morning feeding we have a happy play time for an hour or two that is the light of my day because it is the only time I am guaranteed to have my happy little man : )  So thank the good lord for that hour or two in the morning or I don't know if I could survive this!    I can't wait until we pass through this phase and he can enjoy more of his day.

Thanks for the vent

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Re: I HATE feeding him and that makes me SO sad...

  • kate1011kate1011

    I'm sorry - that does sound rough.  Have you tried burping him in the sitting position so he won't kick your incision?  That's my lo's fav position; just support the head by holding at the jaw.  I hope it gets better for you!

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  • jhoanna.delgadojhoanna.delgado

    I know what you're going through. I promise, it gets better. I went through something similar.

     Mine was more of a BFing issue. I never looked forward to BFing for about 2 months. The pain from him latching was unreal. I cried every time. A lot of the time he would fall asleep after a short while, I put him down and 15 min later he'd wake up only to still feed again.

    Do you have some one to help you, at least to do the laundry?Maybe DH can take over 1 or 2 feeding in the evening/nights to give you a break?

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  • becki78becki78 member
    wow I am going through almost exactly the same thing with my 6 week old...even down to the csection kicks!  I feel the same way.  The ped. prescribed Axid, which given 3x a day is rough to dispense (half of it gets spit out) but seems to have made a difference & is way better tasting for them than Zantac.  He's been on it since Thursday so I'm going to give it a little more time, doc said if it doesn't work on it's own, they combine it with Prevacid.  So far his reflux is better, but def not all gone.  He still wakes up screaming and takes his day time naps on me, when I try to transfer him anywhere (always swings or bassinets on 30 deg incline) he is up within 10 mins, screaming again.  Is your baby on anything for it? Are you formula feeding, if so, Good Start seems to work for colic, but not sure if it's helping him with his reflux....
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  • l_elizabethl_elizabeth member

    I feel your pain. I kind of dread feeding time too. My LO has reflux too, and I hate seeing him spit-up, so I just almost fear burping him. It makes me worry that he doesn't feel good, that he isn't getting enough food, that I will have to change him again...the list goes on. And sometimes  it takes awhile to feed him with all the burping, so by the time he eats, is changed (and held upright), it's been over an hour. He will also scream when I burp him because he's mad I took his bottle away. Sometimes he screams when he's done eating (and he isn't still hungry). I just get frustrated and hate doing it. I can't wait until this passes either. 

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  • osscott4510osscott4510
    imagejhoanna.delgado:

    I know what you're going through. I promise, it gets better. I went through something similar.

     Mine was more of a BFing issue. I never looked forward to BFing for about 2 months. The pain from him latching was unreal. I cried every time. A lot of the time he would fall asleep after a short while, I put him down and 15 min later he'd wake up only to still feed again.

    Do you have some one to help you, at least to do the laundry?Maybe DH can take over 1 or 2 feeding in the evening/nights to give you a break?

    Unfortunately I do not have anyone to help : (  We live in California and all of our family and friends are in Ohio.  DH does do the one feeding he is home/awake for, at night he is a SUPER deep sleeper and I don't trust him to fully wake up and know what he is doing when he feeds the baby at night.  Luckily LO usually only wakes up once sometimes twice at night to feed, it is going to be rough when I go back to work...

    Thanks for the words of encouragement, I am definitely looking forward to it getting better!  For me, but mostly for LO, it's so awful to not be able to do anything to make it better for him

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  • tarapaige1tarapaige1
    I could've written this post. I'm so upset because DS is never awake and happy! His best time is right after he wakes up for the day but it's not long until he's hungry. Hopefully it passes soon so that I can enjoy my baby because right now I'm pretty much just sad and frustrated all the time.
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  • ernocsernocs

    I don't completely understand your frustration, about the constant spitting-up.  But I do understand on the C-Section incision.  My LO did/does the same thing to me...but I have found if I use the Boppy and have it around the higher part of  my waist, even when feeding her the bottle (when I have to supplement), she kicks the air and the upper part of my belly...and no where near the incision.  A pillow works too.  I have to use one when we forget to pack it when we go to the GP homes.

    I would love to give you advice on the burping or spitting-up thing.  But I'm a first time mom whose kid only spits-up when she eats to much or is screaming to much before she gets fed.  Although, I did read to make sure that your baby is calm before you feed her...that way she's not swallowing air before you get food in her.  Don't know if that's something you could use or not.

    But it will get better.  Just be patient and enjoy the happy times.  And love on him in the bad, well love on him any chance you get.

    Big Smile

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  • teelamanteelaman member
    imagekate1011:

    I'm sorry - that does sound rough.  Have you tried burping him in the sitting position so he won't kick your incision?  That's my lo's fav position; just support the head by holding at the jaw.  I hope it gets better for you!

    This. This is how the NICU nurses showed us to do it, and it works great. Plus, there's no kicking involved.

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