Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Question

When you post a vent,not asking a specific question, would you rather have someone give you a personal story or just say "I'm sorry" or ((hugs))?

I ask this because when I comment I usually say my experience... or I've done xyz to help and I wonder if that helps or if people just want me to hug them and shut up. lol

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Re: Question

  • I personally like both. That's why i give both.


    BFP#1 {Cashew} - 9.19.09 EDD 5.26.10
    The day you first lay in my arms, you made my life complete.
    Aurora Rose born sleeping at 35w on 4-21-10
    BFP#2 {Almond} - 2.1.11 EDD 10.12.11 C/P 2.11.11

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  • I like both as well. 
  • I enjoy both. Usually if I have a story or something to input I do, if it seems like a good place to say ((hugs)) or I'm sorry I do.

      Rylan 1/27/2011, 2:42 pm, 5lbs 12oz, 18.5 inches long
     Ayla 10/02/2013, 10:14 am, 6lbs 14oz, 19.25 inches long
    Missed Miscarriage 6w3d 3/02/2010
    I'll hold you in my heart until I hold you in heaven
    .

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  • Both. It helps to know that someone knows exactly how you're feeling and how and why they know that.
  • Both
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  • I like both as well.  
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  • Scout05Scout05 member

    I am so glad you asked this. I agree - you want to offer what you can from your own experience and research, but you don't want the person to think you are taking away from their own situation and pain.

    I like both, myself, and that seems to be the overall opinion.

  • imagelrachelle80:
    Both here as well!!! I like the empathy of (((hugs))) or a simple apology, and I like to hear stories to know that I'm not alone!

    this exactly! If I don't have any experience with what the person is going through, I say I'm sorry and give hugs, but I always like to hear that I'm not alone, so I try to give someone else that feeling.

  • imageambrandau2:

    I am so glad you asked this. I agree - you want to offer what you can from your own experience and research, but you don't want the person to think you are taking away from their own situation and pain.

    I like both, myself, and that seems to be the overall opinion.

    This is how I feel too. It would bother me when I would make a random post (not on here) and people would just say hugs. It made me feel like I was the only person feeling what I felt.  That's why if I have something to say I do, but if not then I stick with I'm sorry and hugs.

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  • Personally, I like personal stories/responses. Hugs are nice too.. but usually if I'm venting about it I guess I would like to hear that other people have gone through something similar, etc.
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  • Both. Sympathy I can get from people IRL in large doses, but you all are the only ones who can understand and provide me with stories or situations where you were faced with the same/similar issue, and what you did to cope.


    BFP #1 via IUI ~ L (Fatal Birth Defect) 4/7/10
    BFP #2 via IUI ~ m/c
    BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
    BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
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  • imageCashewsMommy:
    I personally like both. That's why i give both.

    ditto!  If I've been through something similar, I will mention it.  But, sometimes it's just nice when someone agrees that something really, really sucks. 

    DS1 age 7, DD age 5 and DS2 born 4/3/12
  • Generally I like both, its really comforting to hear personal stories and different perspectives. However if I'm venting I don't want someone to disagree with me... that's my only caveat. If I'm openly whining I don't want to hear about how I should be grateful for whatever, just that it sucks I have somethign to whine about (and yeah that happened on another board) but by all means, share your sucky story too! Whine parties are welcome! Misery does love company! :)
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  • imageIzabella22:
    Generally I like both, its really comforting to hear personal stories and different perspectives. However if I'm venting I don't want someone to disagree with me... that's my only caveat. If I'm openly whining I don't want to hear about how I should be grateful for whatever, just that it sucks I have somethign to whine about (and yeah that happened on another board) but by all means, share your sucky story too! Whine parties are welcome! Misery does love company! :)

    Where'd that happen? I'll put them in there place. lol  

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