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South Florida Babies
CesEve99
member
sahm*
CesEve99
member
i love being a mom. i love being a sahm.
but - im starting to feel a little burned out lately. my only ALONE time during the day is nap time, which is fine by me, but i still don't feel like it's my time. usually during nap time i either take a shower, clean up, seperate some laundry, etc. i know i should just take the time to just rest considering i am out of breath lately but its easier said than done (at least for me i cant stand seeing things UNdone).
dh works everyday...including some saturday afternoons which leaves me with little time for me again. i'm not trying to sound selfish, this is my JOB and i give 100% to do it the best i can. for some reason, i just feel like i'm doing a half-a$$ job at it.
and lately, mady has been giving me huge attitude (shouting mostly) and although i reprimand her, talk to her, give her time outs, sometimes i feel she doesnt love me. when she sees her dad walk in through the door its like i dont even exist...for the rest of the night.
ok, it really must be the pg hormones that are getting to me...
This discussion has been closed.
Re: sahm*
yeah, i could've written this. i don't know what to tell you except that everyone told me it gets better. abby wants nothing to do with me half the time, which i guess is fine since I'm feeding Sarah or changing all. the. time.
the only thing i can say with assurity is that you WILL feel soooooooo much better after you have the baby and you will have energy and feel wonderful and be able to juggle the two of them. I told you that the day I saw you... I thought I would be burnt out, but I actually had energy, energy I didn't have during the pregnancy, and it felt like I had myself back. I felt like I neglected Abbs while I was pregnant, but you iknow what? She really got used to playing on her own since I would lie on the couch for a bit... I was so tired! Now? Now she loves playing on her own, and it's great because i don't feel like iether one of them is being neglected whatsoever.
hang in there
and if you ever want adult company and have a playdate, let me know!
that's the thing, i don't feel i neglect mady at all. every day i do some sort of activity with her, whether its painting, walking the mall, i sit down and have lunch with her daily. my problem is my alone time, that's what's burning me out i think. it doesnt help that im with her every day and when she sees her dad for the 1st time at 7pm she loses her head over him. the terrible twos may have something to do with my feelings too, i feel.
but yes, we should plan a gtg soon!
Don't feel like you have to be ON all the time. That's what I do with Alexis, otherwise I would get totally burnt out. Not only do i SAH, but DH travels all the time, so it's just me for a large portion of the time and it's exhausting! This is especially true for you because you're pg - don't fee like you have to do everything, its ok if it doesn't all get done.
I let Alexis play by herself in her playroom while I sit at the computer for a while. Or I can just sit with her while she's playing and not necessarily be actively engaged in playing but she's happy with my presence so I can read a magazine or book or make phone calls, whatever. When she naps, I catch up on shows on my DVR, emails, etc. I do laundry throughout the day while she's up, she helps. I bring Alexis into the bathroom with me while I shower sometimes and she just hangs out in there watching me or playing with stuff. That way when she is sleeping those things are out of the way.
As for her not loving you, you know that's not true. Kids go through phases, where they favor one parent over the other. She's just excited to see her daddy. You should be happy that she's not glued to you - go out when he gets home. Just go to Publix, or drive around, walk around Target, etc. When DH is in town and gets home after work, I disappear. He takes over the nighttime stuff - dinner if he's home early enough, bath, and bed. I will go get stuff done, or relax, or leave. I'm glad that she's happy to see DH when he's home. Attitude is part of the age so is the yelling. I don't do time-outs but I do reprimand and take things away, most importantly I do not yell back and I do not give in, and I ignore and walk away. I think I've finally realized that nothing I do is going to make her stop having these tantrums for right now, but my reactions can make them less frequent and shorter.
I'm sure you are feeling like you are doing a 1/2 a$$ job b/c you aren't feeling 100% b/c of the pg... I actually feel the same way about my household chores/duties. I finally got some energy Tues night, and cooked! LOL
And as for Mady "not loving you" SO NOT TRUE! I'm sure she adores you, but is prob taking you for granted since she seens you 24/7 now. And yes, the hormones aren't helping!!!
Hope you cheer up soon! ::hugs::
"If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane" -- Jimmy Buffett
thanks for the advice. i know i have to find time for me. i think when dh gets home tonight im gonna go for a walk just to unwind. he does take over bedtime routine with her but then thats when i start cleaning up and i need to learn to set things aside. when mady was born and i stayed with her for 5 mths i learned that when she napped i would nap, i think im gonna follow my old routine more often.
as for my feelings of mady not loving me...i KNOW she loves me. im the 1st person she calls in the morning and she wont go to bed without my giving her a kiss. i guess its the feeling of not feeling appreciated at times, even though she is too young to show it, i may have a little jealousy as to how she welcomes her daddy over me. i am happy she shows so much excitement when she sees him, i also know she sees me all day so the excitement obviously is not the same.
thanks again