the age thing just hit me...

CTFandme · April 2010

and now I'm irrationally sad. My dad is turning 70 next month and I don't know why, but I'm having a hard time with it. I'm obsessed with thinking about him dying and imagining life without him. For the record, he's not incredibly healthy, but he's not bad for his age. For some reason I did the math tonight while I was brushing my teeth and these are the thoughts that followed. He was 32 when he had me. I was 37 when I had my youngest. That means I will be almost 80 when she turns 40, if I'm even still around until 80. I want to see my kids turn 40 dammit! What if my kids have children of their own when they're old like I did. I may never get to see grandkids. Then I got really sad for my kids that they would lose me when they are still young (40s) and that their kids won't have the chance to really get to know grandma. This has consumed me tonight. No flames, please. No, I'm not drunk. Yes, I realize this is terribly ridiculous. I also realize there are a lot of assumptions here. They may never have kids and I could live to be 90. I know, I know. I need a drink.

SumnerBride · April 2010

Yes, you do need a drink. You need to focus on the NOW, and not the future when it comes to your dad. Enjoy the time you have!

MelandJeff · April 2010

No flames from me, I can understand how you feel. I think in some respect, the age thing hits us all the same way it has hit you. I think it is perfectly normal, and you just need to focus on all of the positive things going on and really cherish all that you have. At least, that helps me.

danasport · April 2010

I have these same thoughts, too! I had my kids when I was 36 and 38. I am the youngest of four, and my parents are 72 and 74. They always seemed so young for their age, peppy and fun loving, and suddenly they are slowing down. Way down. My dad was diagnosed with Parkinsons and Dementia. Dealing with that, dealing with my mom NOT dealing with that...oy vay! Sometimes I am so jealous of my friends that were the oldest and have parents in their 60's! Their parents can take their grandchildren for weekends or even weeks at a time!!

I also want to know my grandchildren and babysit a lot, etc...honestly I could have written your entire post. :-) You are not alone! I do tell myself to be happy that both my parents were able to be at my wedding and at least are around for both of my children now. My 4 1/2 year old will always have memories at least and I hope my 2 year old will, too.

Hang in there! PM me anytime. I always feel like I'm the old lady on this board, even though I am young for my age!!! I still run every morning, still can party like an aging rockstar, still have a sense of humor, etc...

MelandJeff · April 2010

You really should focus on a new siggy. The one you have is from last year!

REOM · April 2010

Age doesn't always indicate your health! It's more important to focus on your health, not the number.

But have a few drinks tonight, and worry about being healthy tomorrow

CTFandme · April 2010

danasport - exactly! I'm the youngest of 2 and my brother is 6 years older than me. Most of my friends growing up were the oldest and had young folks. Only recently are my parents starting to slow.

I cherish every day with my parents and I see them a lot and talk to them every day. My mom is 64 and they actually take the kids overnight once a month at least.

I can't party quite the way I used to, but I run long distance still too! I guess running (over partying) will help me live to see them turn 40, huh?!?!

Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone!

CTFandme · April 2010

MelandJeff:
You really should focus on a new siggy. The one you have is from last year!

Really? I'll get right on that. Would it make you feel better if I deleted it?

MelandJeff · April 2010

No, dont delete it, just update it! :-)

danasport · April 2010

Ha! I was just kidding about the partying! I do have maybe two glasses of wine one night per week though! Tee! Oh, and if I go out with friends, you can bet I'm having a cosmo or three! :-)

I knew you'd get replies telling you to focus on the now, etc...but until you are in the situation, you really don't understand.

Love that you are a runner! I'm not long distance, though. I maybe go 3 - 5 miles, three during the week, 5 on weekend mornings when I have more time. That's totally "my" time, before the kids or even my husband are awake.

Take care and have a great weekend!!

SumnerBride · April 2010

And to add....I have young parents, but my IL's are old. My FIL is 83 and my MIL is 73. I know our days with them are limited. So, I am choosing to focus on that instead of waiting for the day they die. And no, that's not sarcasm. I'm totally serious. My DH is 38, and they had him when they were older, so I understand what you're saying. I'm just telling you not to dwell on it.

lsufan · April 2010

Can I just say that you look really young? I would never have guessed that you were almost 40.

Try not to worry so much about something so far into the future. It seems that people are living longer and longer, so I'm counting on being in great health when I'm 80.

And I have a siggy from Christmas 2009 as well. I keep meaning to change it...

CTFandme · May 2010

lsufan:

Can I just say that you look really young? I would never have guessed that you were almost 40.

Try not to worry so much about something so far into the future. It seems that people are living longer and longer, so I'm counting on being in great health when I'm 80.

And I have a siggy from Christmas 2009 as well. I keep meaning to change it...

Thank you!! I'll be 39 this year. I probably don't look as young IRL, but I'll take it!! FWIW, I don't feel this old either.

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