The "stranger danger" talk... — The Bump
Pre-School

The "stranger danger" talk...

I'm just not looking forward to this.  DD is starting preschool in the fall, and has never been outside of our care (except with close family). 

Obviously I'll do it in an age-appropriate way, but having to have this talk makes me so sad....that I'm even introducing the possibility into her little head that people could hurt her.  Ugh.  Any advice?

Re: The "stranger danger" talk...

  • I'm looking forward to replies on this.  Im not looking forward to this talk either. :(
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  • We have an Elmo CD that has a song on it about crossing the street with a chorus of "Take the hand of someone who loves you.... before you cross the streeet"  and then it repeats with "before you move your feet"

    We've just now started talking about who "loves" them and who they should be willing to go somewhere with based on this song.

    I haven't gotten to the "what to do if a stranger tries to get you to go somewhere" thing yet.

    I'll be watching this thread! 

    I'm particularly concerned about this with Jace because he's "never met a stranger"

    Dylan's much more cautious by nature. 

    Our IF journey: 1 m/c, 1 IVF with only 3 eggs retrieved yielding Dylan and a lost twin, 1 shocker unmedicated BFP resulting in Jace, 3 more unmedicated pregnancies ending in more losses.
    Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
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  • DD has a built-in stranger danger. She's super timid.

    I think I'm going to tell DD that nobody is allowed to touch her privates.

    If someone is mean to her, she needs to tell me.

    She is not allowed to have secrets.

    And if she's ever lost, she needs to look for a family and ask them for help. She knows our address, phone, how to spell last name, our names, etc.

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  • I am so worried about this with DS.  He talks to EVERYONE!  I am constantly reminding him that he can not talk to people he doesn't know. 
  • imagebrightning:


    I think I'm going to tell DD that nobody is allowed to touch her privates.


    And if she's ever lost, she needs to look for a family and ask them for help. She knows our address, phone, how to spell last name, our names, etc.

    Thanks to Jace's obsession with grabbing at Dylan's penis we've already got the "private parts" discussions down.  (not that Jace minds about it any better but hey.... it's a start)

    And...

    DUH!!

    Learning their address and phone are a great place to start!

    No clue how the heck I'd teach them that but it's now officially on my list.

    Thanks Bright! 

    Our IF journey: 1 m/c, 1 IVF with only 3 eggs retrieved yielding Dylan and a lost twin, 1 shocker unmedicated BFP resulting in Jace, 3 more unmedicated pregnancies ending in more losses.
    Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
  • imagehowleyshell:

    Learning their address and phone are a great place to start!

    No clue how the heck I'd teach them that but it's now officially on my list.

    I didn't have to teach her my phone number - she kept overhearing me give it out and I heard her repeating it later in the day. My plan had been to teach her by making her a fake phone and put our phone number on it, but I never had to do that.

    She also learned how to spell our last name just by overhearing it whenever I have to spell it.

    I've seriously considered teaching her DH's badge number - I figure she'll get faster results if something ever happens to her if she can just say, "My dad is Sgt. #X" but I think that might be taking it a little too far. :)

    One day she asked where we lived and I used that to teach her our address. When we turn onto our street, I often ask her what our address was and we use that to practice.

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  • Wow, bright you have it down! Dd1 knows her name, daddy's name (I'm moma last name) and we live at "the happy house"

    if you ask her where the happy house is she will tell you our town, but that is about it.  

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  • The car is a great place to have this convo. You can practice all sorts of yelling in the car.

    With DS the biggest thing I tried to hit home was that if someone tried to tell him that a kitten or dog was hurt and they needed his help, they were lying. Adults don't ask kids for help for things like that. Or, if they have kittens or puppies in the car he can say that he will go get his Mom (or whomever he is with). The last draw I figured for him was if someone told him I was hurt and they needed him to come with them. Over and over we talked about how if I was hurt, he would be with me, so he would know, or that someone he knew would be coming to take care of him, not a stranger.

    For yelling we practiced, "NO!", "This is not my Mom!", and "FIRE!". More people will pay attention to the last one then the first, since it is hard to tell sometimes who is having a tantrum or not.

    For getting lost we talked about finding people who worked at the store (or where ever we went) or a Mom with other kids.

    For touching we talked about private parts, secrets, and no matter if someone says not to tell me because I will be mad at them, it isn't true. That the bad person only says that to trick you because they know they did something wrong and don't want others to find out.

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