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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
Serial Biter at Daycare WWYD?
There is a child at my son's daycare that apparantly is a serial biter, I am averaging 2 accident reports a week from daycare in reference to DS being bitten by this child.
They aren't your typical bites either these are hard bruise inducing bites in one case they child bit so hard he broke DS skin there was blood all over DS's shirt from where this child bit him.
According to the reports this kid is random he is not biting because he is provoked. He has apparently bitten other children as well. I asked the head teacher and she said it was just the one child and that they are shaddowing the child, but I am still getting reports weekly of DS being bitten.
WWYD? I am thinking maybe I need to talk to the director about this but I don't really know how to bring it up.
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Re: Serial Biter at Daycare WWYD?
this is ****unacceptable.****
schedule a meeting with director asap.
my gut response is that other child needs to be let go from the daycare due to consistent biting despite efforts, and to the point of drawing blood.
my sister switched daycares b/c her LO was getting bitten and the director wouldn't do anything. the teacher actually told her that if it was her child, she'd switch daycares and not keep her child there. yikes.
that's not the best response though. IMO they need to separate this child if they can't guarantee safety for the other children.
This has happened at my son's daycare, with my son being the victim.
What is the policy regarding biting? Definitely talk to the director. Find out a plan of action and if it doesn't improve immediately ask that the child:
#1. Be sent home every day that he bites. Once the parents start missing work because of this they will begin to take it seriously.
#2. If the biting continues ask that the child be dis-enrolled.
I didn't go as far as #2 because Hudson was about to be moved up to another room. I demanded that he be moved up 2 months early to get away from the biter and they accommodated.
What do you mean, you don't know how to bring it up????
"Hi, Director? i know kids sometimes bite, but this is no longer an isolated incident and something needs to be done. what are you going to do?"
IMO, the biter needs to be kicked out. Sorry, but serial biting is not on the okay list.
I am not quite sure what the policy is in regards to constant biting.
There have been a few instances where the bites were not reported the one that drew blood was one that was not reported. I actually didn't even realize he had been bitten til I got him home and took his coat off. It was clear that it was a bite though given the shape and size of the bite, plus you could make out the teeth marks.
I will have to make an appt with the director thanks for the input.
I am not very good with confrontation and to be honest I wanted to get a sanity check to make sure I wasn't overreacting before going in to talk with my daycare.
I understand. We try to be pretty chill about shizz that happens because there can be a lot of overreacting at daycare, but this is not one of those instances.
Thanks.....I am really not trying to underplay this, I am very concerned about this I just wasn't sure if I was being "that mom" KWIM?
God this pisses me off. I have heard the same thing from two other women with their kids in day care. That is totally unacceptable to allow that child to continue on at that day care. Sounds like you need to find another day care.
Easier said than done, I know. I think you do need to talk to the director, though. GL.
The fact that it was not reported tells me you need a new daycare. They are not shadowing the kid if (s)he can still bite that frequently. They need to find something else to deal with it and the childs parent's need to be involved. DD went through a period (I think she was teething) where she seemed to bite a lot. (not as frequent as your biter) giving her teethers helped we also watched what we did with her at home that may encourage the behavior. She grew out of it rather quickly though...
While I agree that you need to have a serious conversation with your DCP, how do you know that the parents of the biter aren't taking this seriously? My DD went through a phase at DC where she was biting constantly. Let me assure you that I took it very seriously. I was doing everything in my power to work on the behavior. I was having constant conversations with the providers in her room to determine what was triggering the biting and what we could do to stop it.
Please don't assume that the child's parents don't care. Maybe they don't, but you never know. I was embarrassed, stressed, and heartbroken over my child's behavior. I wanted to do anything at all that would make things better. Luckily this phase passed rather quickly in our case.
I'm in no way saying that it is okay for your child to have to suffer, nor am I saying that you shouldn't take this seriously. It is a big deal and I'm sorry that you're dealing with it.
Ditto this exactly. DD wasn't as bad as the biter the OP is talking about. But she has gone through biting phases when she's teething. One week she bit every day, some days multiple times. I can assure you I took it seriously. But there isn't much you can do when the biting is only taking place when you're not around. I did talk with her teachers and director and they worked with us on it.
IMO, it is the daycare that is at fault here. Toddler bite. Every single person I know with a kid in daycare has either had a biter or kid has been bitten. It is common, but your daycare needs to work on a solution. They need to be shadowing him way more than they are if he is able to bite that much and that badly. (DD never broke any skin and her skin has never been broken when bit).
Don't get me wrong I know children bite heck I was a biter as a child, it is the severity of the bites that has me concerned.